Now people have indeed updated some of the concept of marriage, the husband is no longer a bare tube to earn money, the wife is no longer a bare tube money, the current mode of getting along with the husband and wife, completely different from the previous fathers, the current husband and wife, if still in the old mode of getting along, did not update with the changes of the times, so more and more problems, many couples will go to the end of divorce.
It turns out that I also thought that marriage was a matter for two people, and it was not unusual for a man and a woman to take on their own roles and discipline each other. However, now I have found that people in today's era like to be independent and free, husbands do not want their wives to be disciplined, and so do wives, and now women are much more tired than women in the past, and if you add more strict discipline from marriage and husband, it is true that life will be quite awkward, contradictory and problematic.
A good marriage is a husband and wife, no one is in charge of anyone, the wife is too dependent on the husband, the husband will feel that the wife is strong, these problems always plague many couples.
The wife relies too much on the husband, will feel that the husband does not accompany herself, does not help herself to do housework, does not spend money to buy things for herself, the wife asks the husband according to her own will, and if the husband cannot do it, the husband and wife will complain and accuse, the wife feels that she is too wronged, not loved by the husband, there is no husband to accompany, this emotional dependence, the inner harm to the woman who is the wife is very much, because there are always too many expectations and fantasies for the husband, and the reality is often disappointed.
Some husbands regard their wives as their own personal belongings, what clothes their wives wear, they must be managed, always want their wives to wear clothes that they like instead of their wives' favorite clothes, although women are pleasing to themselves, but respect their wives' aesthetics and preferences, which is also what husbands should do. Some husbands hate their wives for being too strong, and don't think that if they do everything in place, will the wife still be a strong woman?
Over-dependence, demanding companionship, and over-discipline, these are the problems encountered by couples now, men want to be free, women also want to be free, and there must be a balance between this freedom and marriage, this freedom must first be based on independence, economic independence and emotional independence, that is, without the company of the other party, they can also live happily, the other party does not give money, they can also earn money to live.
There are too many expectations for the husband or wife, there are too many requirements, always let the husband and wife feelings get worse and worse, the husband feels that the wife is tightly managed, needs an excuse to go out and breathe, the wife feels that the husband does not accompany him, and does not give money, so he has to find an excuse to find a confidant to talk about his distress. Between husband and wife, as soon as there is more complaining, the relationship will be tense, and with these chattering complaints and aggressive accusations, the feelings of the husband and wife are getting weaker and weaker, and the relationship is becoming more and more disharmonious. After there are too many problems in marriage, there are too many opportunities for infidelity.
Absolute trust and excessive dependence between husband and wife will become the last marriage problem, because no one's feelings have always been in an unchanged state, we are all on the road to growth, men have become husbands, women have become wives, and have not stopped growing with these roles, growth will change, so when your absolute trust and excessive dependence, when you encounter changes, the pain of harm is greater.
We marry and live with the people we love, of course, we are running to the desire to live the old, but in today's era, we also need to be prepared for each other to go at any time in marriage, whether it is emotional, psychological, or life, the other party can leave at any time, you can deal with it at any time, not to the other party once left, you are like a collapsed sky surrounded by desperate pain, feel that you can not live.
Especially women, after having absolute trust and excessive dependence on their husbands, they will especially need their husbands to accompany them at all times, and there is also the kind of obedience that husbands must obey their own words, if the husband cannot achieve his wishes, women will be particularly sad and disappointed, and feel that they are very painful in marriage. The relationship and feelings between husband and wife are also like the sand we hold, the tighter we hold, the more it leaks out into the finger slit, and as a result, our hands hurt because our hands are too tight, and the sand in our hands is leaked.
When the other party is gone, we will not collapse, and we will not die and live, this kind of independence without dependence on the other party is a self-protection system that has the heart and emotions to start with ourselves, there is no absolute trust and excessive dependence, and there will be no deep harm. Therefore, people's emotional problems are always complicated, because people's feelings themselves are complex and changeable. We always demand each other's feelings in a constant state of absolute trust and over-dependence, which will obviously conflict with reality.
Therefore, now our business concept of marriage also needs to be updated with the changes of the times, and the current marriage is run by the previous standards, and the problems are more complicated and people are poor to cope with. The divorce rate is high, the infidelity rate is also high, and the happiness of marriage is simply a luxury imagination for people now.
Be kind to yourself in marriage, let yourself have the ability to support and care for each other and your lover, and you must also have the ability to be too sad and disappointed when the other party wants to go, do not let yourself be in absolute trust and excessive dependence, because you have too much hope for each other's happiness and are thrown out of the gap by the disappointment of reality, feel too sad or even collapse.
The reality is cruel, husband and wife are often contradicted by the withdrawal of money, the trivial life of a chicken feather, and the complexity and unpredictability of people's hearts, this variety of situations tell us that we can no longer obsess over the absolute trust and excessive dependence between husband and wife in the past, and strict discipline, only to reflect the standard of love and true feelings. Especially people and women in marriage, improve their talents, have their own ability to earn money independently, can live independently emotionally, read human nature, understand human nature, and can slowly figure out the most suitable way to manage marriage for their own situation.
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