A family in the process of life will always face such and such contradictions, or between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, or between husband and wife, these contradictions are often testing the attitude and way of running the family between husband and wife, and also test whether the family can do enough sincerity and understanding, if you do not know how to understand and communicate with the family, it will inevitably lead to a gap in the heart, leaving a knot, with time more and more difficult to resolve, ultimately affect the feelings of husband and wife, affect life.
In fact, too many problems in life are derived from what they think they should be, thus ignoring the real feelings between each other's hearts, blindly only considering their own considerations is always inappropriate, and for the elders, it is more necessary to take care of the feelings between children, many times to take care of children's feelings, do not act willfully.
There is no need to be idle with the dowry, buy a house for your brother-in-law! Daughter-in-law: Just give me a request
Ms. Zhou's married life
Ms. Zhou and Mr. Bai have been married for two years, the feelings of the two people are still relatively deep, before marriage, the two people are free to love, with a very good emotional foundation, but when they got married, there were still a lot of differences.
Ms. Zhou's family conditions are more general, is the only daughter in the family, the parents naturally love this daughter very much, but when they get married, they are a little opposed, the reason for opposition is also because they belong to the distant marriage, the two families are separated by four or five hundred kilometers, so Ms. Zhou's parents were not very willing at first, but in the end it was for the sake of the child's feelings, only agreed to this marriage, and proposed a dowry of 200,000, on the one hand, the dowry of the marriage around themselves is basically such a situation. On the other hand, it is because Ms. Zhou belongs to a distant marriage, so she proposed such a bride price.
And Mr. Liu's family situation is still relatively good, his parents have purchased a marriage house for him in the early years, but did not decorate, just promised to decorate after marriage, now the money on hand is not much, and it is also an initiative to buy a car, but when Ms. Zhou proposed that the house plus not add his own name, Mr. Liu's family chose to refuse, after all, it was bought in full, although it has not been renovated, but after all, it is bought at home, so it is not willing to write Ms. Zhou's name, which also caused a contradiction between the two families. In the end, Mr. Liu's family agreed to a dowry of 200,000 yuan, but the marriage room would not write the woman's name, which made the two families take a step back and get married smoothly.
After getting married, Ms. Zhou deposited the 150,000 yuan she brought from home into her card, after all, it was her own dowry, and she did not think of moving this dowry, but just wanted to keep the money.
However, even if Ms. Zhou has such an idea, it is not for Mr. Liu's family, because the money has always been "remembered".
When Mr. Liu's home after marriage was preparing for renovation, Mr. Liu proposed to take Ms. Zhou's dowry money for decoration, but Ms. Zhou disagreed and said bluntly:
"Didn't you say that before you got married, didn't you say that you were going to decorate your home after you got married?"
Mr. Liu also explains:
"After all, our family doesn't have a lot of money right now."
Ms. Zhou said:
"Will I have my name on the book?"
Mr. Liu did not speak, but said in a fragmented manner:
"This is definitely not appropriate, then you know our financial situation, my parents can't take care of us both, and I can't always ask the family for money." 」
Ms. Zhou was also angry and said:
"The house before the marriage will not write my name, and you also promised to bear the burden of your family after marriage, then now you have to take the dowry money to decorate, I must be a little unhappy, originally the house is not going to write my name, even if it is, now I am responsible for the decoration, then you say that this family house is your name, the car is also your name, I have nothing?" And the money was originally left to my parents, in other words I should have kept the money at home. ”
Ms. Zhou's attitude is very tough, and finally the relationship between the two families is not very good, and the life in the in-laws' family also makes Ms. Zhou feel unhappy, because she also knows that the reason why Mr. Liu will say such things is actually largely because of the mother-in-law's idea in it, which will lead to such a situation, but Ms. Zhou also feels that she has just married and does not want to make too stiff, so she did not have to worry too much, and finally took fifty thousand yuan to help decorate the home.
But even so, after moving into the new home, the mother-in-law once again found Ms. Zhou and said:
"Daughter-in-law, you don't need the dowry to be idle, buy a house for your little uncle!" He is also approaching this age, the family wants to buy him a house early, in case the house price rises in the future, it is not good, the family is also short of money, want to take your money, the family to make a little more, to pay a down payment, loan us, do not have to worry about you. ”
But Ms. Zhou was not happy to hear it and said:
"Then who will pay back this money later?"
But the mother-in-law said:
"This money let Xiao Liu pay you back in the future, his brother's marriage, he as an older brother also has to help."
The mother-in-law's words made Ms. Zhou completely angry in her heart:
"Mom, I'm in the same family with him, what does it mean to let him return me?" Meaning that the money we make now is not mine, not our family, but his own? ”
The mother-in-law went on to say:
"Then your dowry is not still guarded by yourself, it is your own money, and I have not seen you take it out to your family to spend."
Ms. Zhou was once again wronged:
"This money was originally given to my parents, how much to take over is decided by my parents, and I am far married, after marrying over, the house does not have my name, the car is not mine, there is no sense of security, what is wrong with the dowry money I keep?" The last time I renovated, I took 50,000 out, why is it still like this? Now the little uncle has to take my bride price money when he gets married, I will not agree, what do you think of me? Have you ever been a daughter-in-law? If you want it, just agree to a request, write my name on the house book, when to pay back the money and when to change the name. ”
Ms. Zhou's attitude was more intense this time, and even packed up her things and returned to her mother's house, although the mother-in-law felt inappropriate, and also took the initiative to resolve the contradiction with Ms. Zhou, but Ms. Zhou always did not want to go, always thought that the in-laws did not regard themselves as a family, until now they have not returned to their mother's home.
Write at the end:
For the relationship between the small family and everyone in marriage has always been a matter that many people need to face in life, often this kind of thing is not handled well, which often leads to contradictions, whether it is for parents or for children, after all, in this process, people are only out of their own considerations, or do not know how to understand each other, or do not do enough tolerance, and the situation faced by Ms. Zhou in the text is the same, because there are various barriers between the in-laws and the in-laws. Moreover, the in-laws also have some incomprehension with themselves, which gradually leads to the breakdown of the final relationship.
Therefore, in life, we must understand each other, tolerate each other, and communicate and communicate in time on any matter, so as to avoid the accumulation of contradictions in our hearts, what do you think?