1, there is a classmate, the class suddenly wanted to fart, and it must be a fart, can't hold back, so he thought of a wonderful idea, almost fart when the slap suddenly slapped ... As a result, he was fierce

1, there is a classmate, the class suddenly wanted to fart, and it must be a fart, can't hold back, so he thought of a wonderful idea, almost fart when the slap suddenly slapped ... As a result, he slapped his face violently, and the whole class looked back at him, and then he let out a loud fart. The whole class was overwhelmed...

2, the elderly rich want to marry a beautiful woman as a wife, the woman has never seen what the rich look like. So she went to the temple to pray to the gods and worship the Buddha, and there was an abbot in the temple sitting there telling fortunes. The woman asked the abbot, "Master, if you count the marriages for me, what kind of man can I marry?" The abbot pinched his fingers and said, "Girl, your future husband is older and still bald!" When the woman heard this, she slapped the abbot twice and scolded: "Old bald donkey, I don't want to marry you!" The abbot: "....."

3. I work on a construction site, and after work I drag my tired body home. Seeing a lot of things that my wife bought online on the couch, I said sourly: "The money in the card has been swiped a lot, right?" The wife replied: "At night you also brush, feel free to brush!" After listening to it, I was full of expectations, waited until I had happily eaten dinner, and asked my wife: "Can I brush it casually?" The wife narrowed her eyes, threw the rag into the pool, and said viciously: "Take the bowl and the dish, and brush it casually!" ”"

4. The farmer's wife is pregnant with her second child, and the farmer takes his six-year-old eldest son to accompany his wife to the hospital for obstetric examination. When the registration queue was queued, the farmer said to his son: Son, you must not call me and your mother and parents later, because giving birth to a second child will be fined. His son nodded his head again and again, as if he understood. After a while, a voice came from behind: big brother, big brother. The farmer turned his head to look at it, only to see his son shouting to himself: Big brother, when will my sister-in-law be born?

5. Lead the way this month to organize everyone to build a team together, and our department eats barbecue. The goddess I have always had a crush on in the company does not seem to be very drinkable, and the drink is high. After the meeting, everyone asked me to send the goddess to the hotel, and I reluctantly agreed. When I arrived at the hotel, the goddess was still sleeping, and she decisively took a few nude photos, and the more she looked, the better she looked, and she kissed the photos. Who knew that the goddess suddenly got up and slapped me and said: The old woman has been pretending to sleep for so long, you kiss the mobile phone?

6. On the weekend, my brother-in-law was very depressed at home driving a Maybach self-driving tour, and just after driving out, he hit an old man and fell down. The brother-in-law was frightened and thought that if he was touched, he would be unlucky. So the brother-in-law began to gasp witly, and then lay motionless on the ground. At night, there was no one on the road, and the two of them were lying on their stomachs. Half an hour later, the brother-in-law fell asleep on the ground, and the old man got up and patted the P shares and went home!

7. A few days ago, my girlfriend who studied abroad returned to China and asked me to go out shopping. She drives her Porsche 911, which is very noodle-filled. While shopping, a small child asked me: "Sister, sister, how old are you?" "I'm 22" "Ah, it looks like a teenager!" "Looking at his surprised expression I was so happy and young! Ha ha! "I mean your IQ!" Bear kid come and see I don't beat you to death!

8. Before the blind date, the matchmaker told the brother-in-law: "That little girl has a watery spirit, and her skin is like mutton fat white jade, and the blow bomb can be broken!" After returning from the blind date the next day, the brother-in-law was dejected, and the matchmaker asked: "What's wrong, are you not satisfied?" The brother-in-law shook his head: "Not long after I sat down, she slapped me and left." The matchmaker was surprised: "Why? Brother-in-law: "In fact, they all complain about me, I really can't help but blow her a little, and drop a layer of powder!" ”

9. My cousin participated in the unit physical examination and found a terminal cancer certificate, I took 50,000 yuan to treat him, and he turned around and bought a color drift. Cousin: "Isn't it just a cancer certificate?" Who's afraid of whom! I wiped away my tears and asked him, "What are your plans if you buy a lottery and float the prize?" Cousin: "If I can win 100,000, I will rent a place near our unit and open a restaurant." Me: "What if you planted 1 million?" Cousin: "Then I will play all over the great rivers and mountains of the motherland until there are still 100,000 left, and then rent a place near the unit and open a restaurant." ”

10. My wife works overtime in the company, and I tutor my son at home to write his homework. The house was so quiet that I fell asleep on the couch before I knew it. My wife came back and slapped me awake and asked: What about my son? I opened my eyes in confusion, and my son, who was lying on the table doing his homework, had long since disappeared. As soon as I wiped my pocket and my wallet was gone, I knew something was wrong. In a hurry, he and his wife looked for various kinds, and finally saw his son in front of a supermarket. When the son saw his wife, he immediately went to his wife and cried bitterly: There is not a dime in the wallet.

11, the mother-in-law is 77 years old this year, 160 tall people weigh nearly 180 pounds. But two days ago, my mother-in-law was admitted to the hospital because of high blood pressure! The doctor instructed her to eat some light meals. Today I went to see my mother-in-law, she took my hand, and suddenly tears came to my eyes. I hurriedly asked what was wrong, and my mother-in-law said: Daughter-in-law, when I see your hand, I want to eat pig's trotters!

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #