The girlfriend called and said that her son had returned to his grandmother's house. These two days, her heart was empty, very uncomfortable, let the landlord to accompany her... When I arrived at my girlfriend's house, I saw that the house was in a mess, like entering

The girlfriend called and said that her son had returned to his grandmother's house. These two days, her heart was empty, very uncomfortable, let the landlord to accompany her... When I arrived at my girlfriend's house, I saw that the house was in chaos, like a thief. Just listen to the girlfriend shouting: My son has hidden the money at home, and he will accompany me to find it. Can't find it, I feel bad...

2, the family's Yuxi smoked, I stole my wife 100 yuan to buy the Hibiscus King. When it was time to pay, the big brother in front of him was just 19 yuan 9. He gave the salesman 20, and the salesman found a dime of sugar for him. The eldest brother actually said: No. After saying that, the eldest brother took out 9 such candies from his pocket and said: Find me a piece? My partner and I were stunned.

3. After graduating, I went to work in a private studio and thought that the atmosphere was good and stayed. When I officially punched the card, the finance actually asked me for the card number of two cards, I was very puzzled, but I still reported it. A month passed, the company paid its salary, one card went in five hundred, and the rest went into another card. I was very strange and puzzled to ask a colleague next to me what was going on. The colleague listened, suddenly smiled mimi looked at me, and said: The young man will get married as soon as he sees you, follow the boss well, this year such a boss is not easy to find!

4, the sister's husband went out to buy something, and his Xiaomi Mi 10PRO stayed at home. At this time, there was a phone call coming, I saw the display "10086", I did not think much, I directly hung up. A minute later came a text message from 10086, "Why don't you answer the phone?" "I was so anxious that the ghost made God call back." Dad, why don't you answer my phone. My living expenses are gone, you hurry to call me..." The familiar voice of my granddaughter came from the other side of the phone, and I instantly understood the meaning of 10086.

5, today with the mother to buy vegetables, walked to a stall, look at the island a dish I don't know, I asked the uncle is this a leek? Uncle: Meow. I said: Is this a leek! Uncle: Meow. I remembered the horror story I watched some time ago, the old lady with the cat's face, and it was too scary to think about. Dragged my mom away. When I came back I told my mom about it, and my mom said, "Oh, that's the leek seedlings.....

6, today out of the meeting, the opening sudden stomach pain, hurry to the bathroom to run one by one to push the door, no push movement, a pit did not stay, thinking that it was really unlucky. While waiting, the meeting was over, and a large group of people poured in, pulled open the toilet door and went in to bomb...

7, today a salesman next to me a vigorous sales of his charging treasure, I took out my Nokia and said: "I don't need it." He said, "Why don't you buy one for your girlfriend?" I glanced at him obliquely and said, "My girlfriend is inflated and not charged." ”

8, husband: daughter-in-law, my socks broke a hole wife: cut nails, too long, right? Husband: Yeah, I haven't cut my nails in a long time, daughter-in-law, daughter-in-law, my panties are also a hole. My wife squinted at me and said, "That must be a fart."

9, the husband just entered the door, he complained: "I just parked in the parking space, there was a lack of heart to hit my car, but fortunately, this guy lost me a thousand dollars." I shouted in surprise, "What about giving you a thousand?" When my husband went to take a shower, I took out my mobile phone and WeChat said: "Didn't you say five hundred?" The other party replied: "I'm sorry, I hit it hard..."

10, that day, I rode a bicycle alone, passing through a remote alley, and came to a very beautiful woman. She stopped me, sat directly in the back seat of my bike, put her arms around my waist, and kissed me. I looked confused, and she whispered in my ear: There are two women in the back who are following me, I am afraid, let's pretend to be lovers, please. I looked up, and there were indeed two sisters not far away, secretly looking at this side. This piqued my desire to be protective, to go, and to send her home. In this way, I met, fellowship, and love with her. It wasn't until the wedding that I found out that the two girls were also dressed beautifully, and they were bridesmaids.

1 boyfriend threw my skin on the ground and snorted melon seeds, I reminded him to throw the trash can, this cargo stared at the TV and said let me sweep it. So I snatched the melon seeds from his hand, and my boyfriend looked back at me helplessly, just as my mother came over with a fruit plate, I said, "Mom, your future son-in-law is littering!" Mom's face immediately turned cloudy, and I squinted triumphantly at my boyfriend, and sure enough, his expression was intimidated and embarrassed. The old mother glanced at him, and then issued a leopard-like low roar to me: "How can you bully your boyfriend without talking about marriage?" Let's cook and go! ”

12, the girlfriend returned home, happily told me that the lady of her company returned from a trip abroad, and gave her a high-quality brand bag that began with L, and a travel hat. I was silent, and after a while, I seriously asked my girlfriend, "Is your company boss very kind to you?" The girlfriend suddenly woke up and went through the resignation procedures the next day

13. Accompany a friend to the driving school and see an old coach bullying the new female students. Holding 10 yuan in his hand: "Come, the commissary at the door to help me buy a bag of Chinese, don't want toothpaste!"." The new female trainees were confused and stunned. I smiled and ran over: "Coach, he's new and doesn't understand things, I'll help you buy it." So I took the 10 bucks and went home."

14, go to the bank to withdraw money, there are more people, take the number queue in the idle bored, the number of the paper folded into a heart shape, just folded to me, too late to dismantle, directly handed to the window girl. The girl looked at me, blushed, looked at the balance on my card, and decisively threw it into the trash.