Text/Zhiheng
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In the TV series "Xiao Min Family", because of Chen Jiajia's willfulness, her mother and stepfather's children disappeared, which made Chen Jiajia's stepfather very angry, and he had to let Chen Jiajia give him a reply.
Looking at Chen Jiajia's father's face full of anger and heartache, the majority of netizens can feel his sadness. The child is gone, I am afraid that the saddest thing is the parents.
Sometimes, however, children can become a burden on parents, for example, when couples face divorce, the ownership of children becomes a problem. When parents face remarriage, the child's retention also becomes a big problem.
A friend of mine, after her divorce, chose to leave her son to her parents and then regularly sent money home for her son's daily expenses.
Without children dragging her down, she soon entered the work, and successfully fell in love and prepared to get married. Despite what she is still thinking about, because the precondition for her boyfriend to get married is that she does not want to take her friend's son back, and hopes that she can be as far away from her son and ex-husband as possible.
I also have a friend who is also divorced with a daughter, and her daughter was only two years old when she divorced, because she was reluctant to leave it to her ex-husband, she chose to take her daughter with her.
Now that her daughter is ten years old, she also wants to fall in love and start a family, but she is not lucky, she has been on a blind date many times, but she has never met a suitable person. Or rather, she didn't meet anyone who was willing to marry her, and the reason was simply because she had a child.
"It's really hard to remarry with kids!" This is probably the voice of many people.
But what is wrong with the child, and why is it not good to remarry with the child? Or if it were you, would you marry a divorced woman with a son?
For this question, the three men gave their own answers, and their answers were surprisingly consistent and realistic.
01 "After all, I am not his own father, and I can't give him true fatherly love"
Xu Feng has been divorced, and he has also kissed and thought about remarrying over the years. But he was divorced like this, and the women introduced by others were also divorced.
There's nothing wrong with that in itself, but the problem is that most divorced women have children, and he can't accept women with children.
The woman who can't accept the child is not because he hates it, but because he feels that he is not the father of the child and cannot give him true fatherly love.
Raising a child is a very sensitive thing, and even if he is good to the child, there will be a gap in the middle. If the child is small and OK, from small to large, it is similar to the biological child, but whenever the child remembers things and understands things, he will always think of his own father.
In addition, divorce will have a certain impact on the children, and if this relationship is not handled well, it will also harm the children in the future.
Therefore, no matter what, Xu Feng does not want to marry a divorced woman with children, he would rather not get married in this life.
02 "I'm afraid two people will disagree on the issue of educating each other's children"
For Qianyuan, he is also reluctant to marry a divorced woman with children, for no reason other than him, as a primary school teacher, he is afraid that the two people will have differences on the issue of educating each other's children.
As a teacher, he even has the importance of his children's education, sometimes to be generous and generous. Naturally, when you are kind, you don't need to say much, but everyone has a temper, especially in the case of children, and sometimes anger can't help but have to be sent out.
Even if you lose your temper and turn around and coax, your child is still close to himself. But other people's children are different, and if you lose your temper with him, I am afraid that the other party will remember it.
Where do you teach your child to have a good temper? Sometimes it's not harsh, and the child really can't listen. Even the students in his class sometimes have to criticize harshly so that the child can remember it.
Therefore, in view of this, Qianyuan is reluctant to marry a woman with children, and if he really can't meet the right person, he may never want to get married again in this life.
03 "I also have children, I am afraid that I will not be fair and just"
For Wu Jie, he is reluctant to marry a divorced woman with children, and the reason is also because of children. Wu Jie and his ex-wife have a child, for him, the child is his life, so when he divorced, he took pains to get the child over.
He attaches great importance to the education of his children, in the past 3 years of divorce, he has been a father and a mother, although he is very tired, but he is also very happy, especially when the child shouts at his father, he feels that all the hard work is worth it.
Some people also introduced him to the object, although he did not have too much heart to remarry, but still thought that if he could meet the right one, it would be best, so he did not refuse.
Unfortunately, eight out of ten of the women introduced to him had children. He also has children, plus each other's children, two children, and he really doesn't know how to be a good stepfather, a pro-dad.
Good for this, wronged that, good for that, wronged this. Even if both children are biological, it is rare to be able to level a bowl of water, let alone one biological and one to someone else.'s
And once the child can not be fair and just, the child's psychology will also appear, so that it will not also hurt the two children. This is the last thing Wu Jie wants to see.
The answers of the three men to the question of whether they would marry a divorced woman with children were unexpectedly unanimous, and they were reluctant to do so.
And looking at the reasons they say, it is actually very reasonable and especially realistic. Indeed, children are the flowers of the motherland and need to be cared for with heart. But it is not his own child, and in terms of care, he always feels that he cannot perform it.
Children are the most innocent, whether they experience parental remarriage or experience parental divorce, children are hurt in ways that parents can't imagine.
I hope that all people can think clearly before getting married and having children, and once they choose this way, they should not divorce easily. Of course, if you really can't live, don't reluctantly love to live together, children are very sensitive, how the parents feel in their hearts are very clear, don't hurt them in disguise in the name of loving them.
END.