Guangzhou Listen and Speak Bar Psychological Counseling Introduction:
Nowadays, the younger generation seems to be free in the choice of feelings, but there are more worries and unknowns.
Now one-night stands, extramarital affairs, leg splitting things are not uncommon, in the face of a new relationship, many women will worry about whether the other party is sincere, afraid of being played, with such worries and fears in love to suffer from loss, and even afraid of love.
"I'm 28 years old and my parents keep urging me to go back on a blind date. Hey, in fact, I am not bad, but I am always afraid of meeting people who are unladylike, being played, and I am not embarrassed to see men with feelings, worried that the other party already has a girlfriend or is married.
In fact, when I was in college, I also longed for love. When I was a sophomore, I met a man, 3 years older than me, very chatty, and then began to chase me, but also very good to me, the two people also naturally developed into boyfriend and girlfriend.
I went to see my parents at my house during the summer vacation, and I would buy things for my parents on the big holidays. Mom and Dad liked him a lot.
I thought we could develop well, but after a year I found out that this was not the case. One day I called his phone and found that it was always turned off. At that time, because I couldn't contact him, I was very anxious, so I had to ask someone who knew him, and when I inquired, I learned that he was married and the children were 5 years old. I broke down...
Thinking back to when we were together, there were several mentions of asking him to take me to meet his parents, and he always shirked it for various reasons, even saying that his parents did not agree with us together, that his mother had a bad temper, and that if I went this way, I would suffer. I offered to meet his friend, and he said several of his friends were busy and kept pushing. At that time, I felt that love was a matter for two people, and I usually had a lot of homework, so I didn't care. Now that I think about it, I'm really stupid.
Later he contacted me, I asked him if he was married and had children, he admitted, but said that he had a bad relationship with his wife, his wife and daughter were in his hometown, and he was ready to divorce his wife when the children were older.
Later, I told my parents about this matter, and they were very angry, felt that there was a problem with the character of others, and asked me to break off relations with him. Later, I didn't have any more contact with him...
I also slowly walked out, went to work in the field after graduation, and I haven't seen him again for so many years. However, now every time I meet someone who has feelings, I am always very afraid, afraid of being deceived again. Alas, what should I do?"
Guangzhou heard about the interpretation of psychological counseling for extramarital affairs
The most feared thing in the relationship is to be played, originally one party is sincerely paying, but the other party has another purpose, bringing great psychological trauma to the party who really pays.
When encountered to be played, they often feel sad, blame themselves, feel that they are too stupid to be deceived, blame themselves for believing in each other too much and being toyed with, and dare not believe their partners in the future marital feelings; feel unwilling, very angry in their hearts, but it is difficult to express their emotions to that person; some people feel unclear in the process, and their hearts are very confused. Mixed emotions.
After such a sad encounter, some women want to develop a set of anti-deception programs to protect themselves, avoid similar situations or help themselves out.
But this method is unrealistic,
First, the situation encountered by each person is different, and the understanding and response to the situation are different;
Second, many things need to be discovered after communication, in the early stage of love everyone will cover up themselves to win each other's love, and it takes time to see the true face of each other.
Faced with the experience of being toyed with, how can we get out of this trauma and reduce the harm to ourselves?
The first is to admit that you have been hurt, let the backlog of emotions be released, and say goodbye to the "unfinished event";
The second is to forgive oneself and rebuild faith;
The third is to reorganize the understanding of love and clarify some criteria for consideration before determining the relationship to protect yourself.
If necessary, you can seek a professional emotional counselor to help yourself emerge from this emotional trauma and enter a normal love marriage.