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"Quiet Don": "Don't spit into the well, maybe you will come and drink the water from the well." ”
Maybe you won't drink the well water you spit on again, but you may be able to turn to someone you've hurt.
No one can be sure that their life will be smooth, because you don't know which tomorrow or the accident will come first. If you think very highly of yourself, thinking that you can never look back, never ask for anyone, sooner or later you will pay the price for this arrogance.
Taking marriage as an example, some men look down on their wives, think that they are worthy of a better wife, worth living a better life, so in order to divorce, unscrupulously hurt their wives, and even abandon their wives and children.
Such people are often hit by reality and recognize that they are not great. When they can't go on mixing, they will "miss the old", they will linger on their ex-wives, they will realize their mistakes after realizing it, and they will want to remarry their ex-wife. But the results are often not satisfactory, because they block the road to remarriage when they divorce.
The reason why the following woman refuses to remarry her ex-husband is because the harm her ex-husband has done to her is unforgettable, let's take a look at what is going on.
Hello Mr. Donglin:
My girlfriend has recently been struggling with whether to remarry her ex-husband: "Although I used to hate him, now I pity him a little because he has a bad life." 」 He begged me to remarry him for the sake of my children, and his attitude was very sincere, do you think I should promise him? If it was just a remarriage and did not consider other issues, I could agree; but, thinking of what he had done before, I was afraid that after the remarriage, I would repeat the same mistakes, so entangled! ”
I did not give her clear advice, because this kind of thing varies from person to person, whether to remarry, only depends on whether you are willing or not, others have no right to make decisions on your behalf, otherwise in case of problems, who will bear it?
She asked me for advice because I had a similar experience. When my ex-husband asked me to remarry, he said something similar to her ex-husband's statement: "For the sake of the children, remarry me!" ”
I refused him without hesitation: "Don't talk to me about children, you don't deserve it!" Don't say it as if you are very sad for your children, when you insisted on divorcing me, how did you not care about the feelings of your children? I don't believe you will change, you come to me to remarry, using children as an excuse, is nothing more than to cover up the truth of your own incompetence! Whether you mix well yourself is your own problem, and you don't want to bother me and the children! ”
My hatred for him will never be gone; the hurt he has done me, I will never forget.
We could have lived a dull life in peace, but he was restless, didn't like a plain life, thought he shouldn't live such an ordinary life, and thought he deserved a better life.
He heard that a friend had made money by starting a business, and he thought that he could also take this road, thinking that he was no worse than that friend, and he had to let me support him, let me give him all the money to make money, and let me go to my mother's house to borrow money.
I advised him to calm down, because others are successful in starting a business, not only because of ability, but also because of the ingredients of luck, others may not be successful if they do it, and they should not be so blind.
Then he started hurting me without saying a word. I couldn't bear to argue with him, he was going to divorce me, saying that I was not Wangfu's wife, saying that I was delaying him to live a better life, saying that he would take the divorced property to start a business, and when the time came to become famous, I would definitely regret it.
He didn't get what he wanted, and like I said, he wasn't as lucky as his friends, and not only did he run out of money, but he was in debt. He couldn't go on, so he thought of remarrying me, which is the truth, he wanted to remarry me, not because he was worried about his children.
I don't know what the specific situation of my girlfriend and her ex-husband is, I just hope that she will think clearly, look back at the reasons for the divorce, and at the same time figure out the truth that men want to remarry, don't be confused and remarry, and don't remarry because of a momentary touch, otherwise sooner or later you will regret it. Do you think I'm right?
Donglin Xiting Emotional Advice:
For some couples, divorce is easy, and remarriage is easy because each other's feelings have not really broken down.
In addition to this situation, it is "easy to divorce and difficult to remarry", because it is difficult to break the mirror after the relationship is broken.
Especially in the case of the woman and her ex-husband, it will be more difficult to remarry, because the request for remarriage is made by the man who insisted on divorce in the first place, and whether or not she can eventually remarry depends only on whether the woman agrees.
In this case, the woman should consider not "whether to remarry", but "whether to remarry".
Consider whether you should remarry, care about the "value of remarriage", whether remarriage is good for yourself. If it is beneficial and harmless, of course it should be remarried; but if it is harmful and unprofitable, it should not be remarried.
Perhaps in the eyes of outsiders, the woman resolutely refused to remarry, ignoring how miserable her ex-husband was, and appeared inhumane. But from her own perspective, her decision has its own merits.
As she said, she reviewed the reasons for the divorce, recognized the truth that her ex-husband wanted to remarry herself, and thus came to the conclusion that "remarriage is harmful to herself", so she would refuse. This is not called impersonal, but to live cautiously.
I hope that others can learn from her ex-husband, do not blindly dislike their marriage, do not blindly hurt their wives, otherwise your blindness will only bring disaster to you, even if you regret it, it is difficult to let your ex-wife share with you.