1, the husband returned early from a business trip, just arrived at the door, heard the voice of a man in the bedroom, very angry, and rushed into the bedroom in a panic. I saw my wife sitting on the bed alone in sweat

1, the husband returned early from a business trip, just arrived at the door, heard the voice of a man in the bedroom, very angry, and rushed into the bedroom in a panic. Seeing his wife sitting on the bed alone in sweat, the husband asked angrily: What about people! The wife replied breathlessly: Say... Say what, how can there be other people in this room. The husband's bedroom, living room, kitchen, under the bed, wardrobe are all looked for again, and sure enough, a figure was found on the bed table, the husband kicked down, and the wife came in later and said, "Hey, where did the master who repaired the air conditioner go?"

2. The husband is the sales manager of the BMW 4s store, who sold more than 30 cars last month, plus the bonus and received a total of 800,000 yuan. After the salary arrived, the lady boss said to the old man: "Don't put all the money in your pocket is not safe!" When the old man listened, his heart tightened: "Lady boss, you are right, I can't take this money away by my wife!" After that, the old man solemnly returned the money to the boss lady!

3. The daughter-in-law worked at Foxconn for 2 years and was recently promoted to supervisor. Last week, she went on a business trip, and today, she suddenly texted me and asked: Honey, what are you doing? I immediately replied: I am at work, I am exhausted, when will you come back from a business trip? Her: I'm back, just stand behind you, the wave of battle you just fought was so wonderful! Oops I went, I was tricked again!?

4, go to the dental wisdom tooth extraction plus an operation, because you can't speak, so you recorded a sound "good pain" in advance, as soon as you feel pain, press the play, the whole clinic echoed "good pain, good pain, good pain...", a group of doctors and nurses in that hahahaha endless... Later, the doctor who operated on me couldn't bear it and took my mobile phone away...

5, wife: "I like feminism, I think a modern woman should maintain her legal rights, the right to know the whereabouts of men; the right to supervise men's property; when bored, but also to keep pet dogs..." Husband: "What about men's rights?" Wife: "Men, you must have the right to work." Husband: "Men have too few rights." Wife: "Men still have the right to silence." ”?

6, buddy is an ordinary worker in the electronics factory, with an income of only 4500 yuan. Today the buddies went on a blind date in Quanjude and let me be his wingman. After arriving there, the woman opened her mouth and asked for a gift of 100,000 yuan. Then he said: "If you have been together for 50 years, you will only be 5 yuan and 4 yuan 8 a day, and it is already very cheap for you who have no house and no car." "I couldn't help but look at my buddies' faces that were almost blackened. Just say, "Well, let's give 21 a day, no, 22 yuan a day, settle the bill by day, and after 50 years you can make 4 times more money." "The woman won't speak.?"

7, take the bus in the morning, come up a few deaf and mute people. I didn't know they were deaf and mute before, but I didn't know it until I saw them signing sign language with each other. Then someone got up and gave them a seat, and they signed at people and didn't sit down, and they compared for half a day, and we understood that the gist was that they were just deaf and dumb, and their legs and feet were not broken, so they didn't sit. Later, when I thought about it, the person who gave up the seat was quite stupid.

8, fu er dai sent from The Run-off to take a taxi home, ready to pay with the driver master said: master Alipay to pay. The driver master took out the mobile phone, there is a two-dimensional code on the desktop, the driver master: you scan this payment. Fu Er Dai said: Yes, it is very convenient, get it yourself? The driver said: It was my son who helped to get it. The second generation of the rich will sweep up the bills. As a result, I took a look at his mobile phone, I didn't get the account at all, I sent it directly to his son, and the master left with a dragon swinging his tail in place!

9, female colleagues last asked me to help her charge two hundred words, now it is two months, has not yet returned me, I asked her for three times, but she always said next time with a hippie smile. Today I went to her again, and the female colleague said: Stingy, isn't it 200 words, how many times have you urged? When she said this, I was a little embarrassed, and I said: Then you say an accurate time. Female colleague said: Why do you always think about money? Do you think otherwise, I'll make you a wife, and the money will be written off, right? I thought for a moment: "No, not a single point can be less." Some people may say that I am stupid, this is equivalent to getting a girlfriend in vain, hehe, you think, when I am a girlfriend, I have to charge her every month, and I have to spend my money, live in my house, drive my car, think of the beauty, you say right??

10, today is really distressed, there have been two female neighbors who have asked me to dinner, and the time is still conflicting. When I went to work, the boss asked me: "Why am I absent-minded and troublesome?" I had to tell the truth: "Boss, why do you say that I am so unlucky, every time I move, I will be entangled with female neighbors, the key is still beautiful.... You say this thing?" Oh my god! The boss suddenly shook my hand and said, "Brother, I call you brother, you tell me how you can attract female neighbors!" I thought about it carefully and said one word, handsome!

11. On this day, the bald rich man accompanied his girlfriend to the barber shop to perm his hair, and the rich man sat in a chair and waited to fall asleep. When he woke up, he found that his hair was full of soapy water! The owner smeared some soapy water on top of his head! After half a day, the rich man couldn't help but ask: I don't get a haircut, why do you put soapy water on me? Boss: You just sit, you do a live advertisement for me here, people will know that you are cutting your hair here, and it is cut quite clean!

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #