1, a traffic policeman is issuing a ticket, a man with a cigarette came over and shouted: ''What will you do in addition to the ticket?' The traffic police ignored it, and the man continued: "There is a kind of dragging away|" The traffic police were furious

1, a traffic policeman is issuing a ticket, a man with a cigarette came over and shouted: ''What will you do in addition to the ticket?' The traffic police ignored it, and the man continued: "There is a kind of dragging away|." "The traffic police are very angry, and the man continues: there is a kind of dragging away!" The traffic police couldn't bear to take out the walkie-talkie, and when towing the truck, they kindly said to him: ''Come to the five brigades in the afternoon to deal with it!'" Man: "It's my bird business, the car is not mine!" After humming a little song, he rode away on the battery car.

2, this day the rat dragged people to buy a bag back. The next day, he was driving around the road, showing off his new bag, when suddenly a flower cat found it. The mouse quickly slammed on the accelerator to escape, which knew that the flower cat fought for his life, chased after it, and saw that it caught up, and the mouse thought that he was dead today. At this time, the flower cat looked at the mouse and snorted: "I thought it was a brand-name bag, and such a broken bag was also good to come out and hang out." After saying that, he turned around and walked away.

3. The brother-in-law who graduated from college became a line manager in an electronics factory, and his salary rose to 80,000 yuan. He was particularly pleased and came to me with a bottle of Moutai wine. After three rounds of drinking, I said drunkly: My daughter-in-law is beautiful, she is a mother of two children, and walking is like dancing! When my daughter-in-law heard this, she was immediately happy and asked me: Honey, what kind of dance am I dancing? The brother-in-law rushed to answer: This still needs to be asked? At a glance, you can see that it is two hundred and five!

4, my wife asked me to buy 10 pounds of rice, and I went to give me the money. I went to the store and said: Boss, buy 8 pounds of rice. The boss smiled and said: Your wife weighs 10 pounds every time she comes, are you mistaken? I hurriedly urged: it is 8 pounds faster. Then the boss picked up the phone next to him, as if he were on the phone. The boss looked at me and said, "Well, you're done playing when you get home."

5. I am a student at the Polytechnic University, there is a female student in our class, no matter what you look at once, you will!? I found that whenever she did a difficult math problem, she habitually pulled the hair on her forehead up, revealing her big forehead!? I was curious and asked her why. She said: Because CP U needs good heat dissipation when it operates at high speed, otherwise it will cause crashes!?

6, the girlfriend has a relatively large amount of rice, and sometimes can eat two large bowls of rice. When I brought my girlfriend back to my house, my mother made a lot of dishes, all of which my girlfriend liked to eat, and my girlfriend's appetite was wide open, and a bowl of rice would be gone after a while. How can a bowl of rice be enough? My girlfriend was going to the kitchen with the bowl, and my mother quickly said: Put the bowl on it, I'll brush it. My girlfriend was a little embarrassed to put the bowl on the table, and I was not embarrassed to serve rice, so I said that I was not hungry and could not finish the rice, and then asked my girlfriend to help me eliminate the rice in my bowl.

7. The creditor defaulted on the debt for too long, and the local tycoon boss decided to personally go to the door to collect the debt. When the local tycoon came to the customer's house, he was just in time to catch the man slaughtering a fat hen. The local tycoon boss opened the door to the mountain: "Sir, why don't you pay me back the money you owe?" Creditor: "Ah, my friend, I really don't have any money, so wait a minute!" The local boss: "No money?" So why do you still slaughter chickens? Creditor: "Don't get me wrong, it's because I can't really come up with anything to feed it." The local tycoon boss: "This reason is inevitably too desolate." ”

8. When I was in junior high school, there was a buddy in the class who came from elementary school karate, and he often caused trouble everywhere because he had some skills. Once, he made a date with someone on the Internet, and specially called us to watch the game, and changed into Zhongshan suits and black leather shoes. As a result, when we all went to the distance to watch him abuse the dish, he came up with a kick and the crotch of his pants was gorgeously split... I still can't forget the driver's wild laughter when we carried him with a blue nose and swollen face to the taxi.

9. The boss is signing a contract of 60 million, and I prepared red wine as an assistant. After the contract was signed, the bosses of the two rooms shook hands and the others applauded. At this time, I brought the red wine up, and suddenly the boss said to me: "Believe it or not, I can open the red wine with my thumb?" I looked surprised, shook my head, and said, "I don't believe it." The boss said lightly: "Then you don't bring the bottle screwdriver yet!" ”?

10. One day I went to the canteen to eat, ordered a bowl of egg flower soup, and drank a mouthful of egg flower soup to feel that the egg flower soup was too salty. Then he said to the chef, "Your soup is a little salty." The chef smiled slightly and said, "You can drink it for a while." I felt a little puzzled: "What do you mean?" Chef took a puff of his cigarette, looked out the window, and said deeply, "Time can dilute everything." ”

11, my eldest brother is a nibbling old family, since the end of college neither work nor blind date, recently by the mother forced out to find a job. After doing the delivery of takeaways, he did a very hard job. I asked him what was your motivation to run the takeaway desperately? Big Brother: And play the game a matter, a week to run 100 singles is bronze, running 200 singles is silver, running 300 singles is gold, running 400 singles is diamonds, running 500 singles is the king... It turned out that the eldest brother did not go to work, but just changed the game play. "

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #