When I was climbing, I met my ex-wife, and I didn't say a word, silently following behind her ass. After a while, she stepped aside and said: You go first, you have to live and go fast! I asked her what was wrong? She said: I am now

When I was climbing, I met my ex-wife, and I didn't say a word, silently following behind her ass. After a while, she stepped aside and said: You go first, you have to live and go fast! I asked her what was wrong? She said: I now have two little people in my head, one who says left foot and one who says right foot, and both tell me to kick you down the mountain.

A woman ate noodles at the Guangxi Railway Station, and when she checked out, she found that a bowl of noodles cost 1,000 yuan, so the woman did not hesitate to call the police, and after calling the police, she found that the bowl of noodles was really worth 1,000 yuan. It turned out that the owner had found that when a man and a woman were eating noodles, the man's look was not quite right, so he asked for 1,000 yuan a bowl of noodles, which was expensive, and the woman certainly couldn't bear to call the police. As a result, the man listened. Frightened, he immediately ran away. Because he is engaged in pyramid schemes. In this way, women will avoid being deceived by pyramid schemes.

Yesterday went to the supermarket to buy cigarettes, bought a bag of 20, gave the owner 50. Looking for me 40, I pretended not to know, put it in my pocket and left. The boss didn't go far and called me: Your cigarette was not taken, and I shed tears of emotion.

Take out ten dollars to the boss: you found me ten more dollars. The boss also shed tears of emotion: Boy, bring the cigarette, I will change a pack for you. Smoking the cigarette that the boss had just changed for me, the pure taste couldn't help but move me again: Boss, take the 50 just now and I will give you another one.

The boss took the 50 and was also touched again: Young man, give me the money that was looking for you just now, and I will change it for you. After taking the boss to find my money again, I was also moved again, and took out a mobile phone from my pocket: Boss, the mobile phone is returned to you. The boss was in tears, trembling and pulling out a wallet: Boy, the wallet is back to you.

On a particularly cold winter day, an employee explained to his boss the reason he was an hour late: "Outside."

The road is particularly slippery, and I take a hard step forward and then two steps back. ”

The boss said with some incredulity: "Is this really the case?" So how did you get to the company? ”

The employee said helplessly: "After walking for half an hour, I finally conceded defeat, so I turned my head and began to walk home, and as a result, I walked for half an hour to the company." ”

There was a female physical education teacher who had just graduated from our class, and she was really beautiful. I was on the varsity hurdles, and she helped us train and said she was going to open my crotch. I didn't know what it was to open my crotch, that is, to make me lie flat on the ground, my legs were frog-like, and then she used her knees to push my two knees until the knees touched the ground. At that time, I thought: It is rare to be intimate with a beautiful woman, and the pain cannot be said to be painful! As a result, the whole classroom that day was the sound of my slaughtering pigs...

Uncle went to work in the electronics factory, made the belly of the factory flowers bigger, and the uncle was a responsible person, so he married the factory flowers home and became my aunt. My aunt didn't like her uncle to smoke, but she didn't have a good nose, and sometimes she couldn't smell her uncle stealing cigarettes. This night, my uncle secretly smoked on the balcony, always on high alert, heard the door knock, and immediately threw the unfinished cigarette downstairs. The aunt came over and asked alertly: What is it? The uncle calmly replied: Look at the scenery. Before the words fell, someone downstairs shouted: Which lack of morality to throw down the cigarette butt!

After I got off work at Foxconn this evening, I found that the light bulbs in our house were broken, because I was a little afraid of heights, so I didn't dare to change them. Finally my wife couldn't help but let me change it, and I pushed TUO: "It's too high, I can't reach without a ladder!" Wife: "As far as your appearance is concerned, you can get it without a ladder!" Me: "What does it have to do with looks?" Wife: "Haven't you heard of the beam-jumping clown?" ”

The brother thought that it was a car accident and became half-dead, and the sister-in-law abandoned her brother and remarried to a foreign country. My nephew was young and unattended, so I took him into our house. Now that my nephew is in junior high school, he is much shorter than his peers. At dinner yesterday, he said: Second uncle, there are three girls in our class chasing me. I quickly praised: Cow, much more powerful than your uncle! The nephew then said: "Later, I really couldn't run, and I was chased and beaten by the three of them. I couldn't help it then, and laughed out loud on the spot!

#Funny paragraph # #搞笑 #