Marriage is a top priority for young people and a headache that currently plagues young people. Authoritative data show that the marriage rate has been as low as 5.8 ‰, which has been decreasing for eight consecutive years.
The so-called "marriage rate" refers to the ratio of the number of people married in a certain period of time to the number of people in a certain range in the same period. The decline in the marriage rate year after year directly indicates that the number of people married is decreasing.
Looking at the surrounding crowd, it is not difficult to find that the elderly unmarried young people have grabbed a large handful. Why are single and marriageable youth so "abundant" that fewer and fewer people are married. What makes those older youths prefer to be alone and determined not to get married?
High load of economic pressure
I am not a medicine god, there is a line that says it really well, there is only one disease in the world, and that is the disease of poverty.
The number one factor for young people not wanting to get married is the "money" hilariousness.
Except for a small number of young people with wealthy families, the vast majority of older young people who are not married are undoubtedly caused by "no money".
In fact, when discussing why young people do not get married, the scope of the discussion has been locked, mostly young people from poor families.
Those single young people who are rich in families are either eccentric, or have eccentric conditions, or are divorced and single.
In modern society, it costs a lot of money to get married. Wedding rooms, bride prices, banquets, wedding photos, honeymoons, etc., a series of expenditures add up, enough to "reimburse" the savings saved by an ordinary working-class retired couple overnight.
For those rural couples facing the loess with their backs to the sky, it is simply an unattainable dream.
As early as 20 years ago, there was a word in society called "nibbling on the old people". At that time, everyone cast a dismissive glance at "nibbling on the old", and even criticized and scorned it.
Twenty years have passed, "nibbling on the old" has become the norm, and no one is quite critical of it anymore.
Because with the continuous increase in the cost of living, the meager salary of the vast majority of young people can no longer cope with such a huge expenditure.
Getting married has become a big project for the whole family.
Young people seem to be in gorgeous classes, seem to earn a lot, in fact, spend a lot, mostly live in a state of moonlight.
Some people know that young people should struggle and rely on their own skills to buy a house, a car and a daughter-in-law. Ask, the salary of five or six thousand in third-tier cities must earn until the Year of the Monkey and the Month of Horses to get an average house price of more than 10,000 yuan.
Suppose a young man's salary is eight thousand yuan, and he earns 120,000 yuan a year without eating or drinking. Assuming that the house price is 15,000 square meters, according to the calculation of 80 square meters, the total house price must also be 1.2 million, and you can buy a house without eating or drinking for ten years.
The house was barely solved, and then there was the problem of the bride price. In the early years, a national bride price map exploded on the Internet, and the authenticity of this survey was not known to the author, but it could reflect some realistic information.
Add to this the expenses of the honeymoon period from acquaintance to marriage. It is completely understandable that young people do not dare to talk about marriage easily.
Weddings, honeymoons, dowries, and dowries are the same, can the mother-in-law promise you?
Even if you reluctantly get married, the cost of having children and the cost of maintaining the interpersonal communication between the seven aunts and eight aunts have become the biggest stumbling block to prevent young people from getting married.
To put it bluntly, the problems all originate from "money". Not getting married is no way to change the status quo under the most "comfortable" lifestyle.
People's "appetite" has become more and more tricky
Insight determines thought, and thought determines action.
With the rapid development of society and the expansion of young people's knowledge and insights, young people are no longer satisfied with the family state of "three acres of land and one cow" as in the past. They are becoming more and more demanding of themselves, and in contrast, the criteria for mate selection are also rising.
"Rather lack than abuse" has become the first concept of mate selection for young people.
It is necessary to be satisfied with the actual material living conditions, but also to have the common pursuit of the three views. The "house car" has brushed off most people, and it is even more difficult to find people with the same "three views" from the few survivors.
The water flows low, and the people go up. This is the law of nature, and it is also human nature, and there is nothing wrong with it in itself.
But don't forget the "law of two and eight" of human civilization, the generally recognized excellent people account for less than 20%, and the remaining 80% of people are vast beings.
Because the improvement of ideological insight is improved by the whole people, 20% and 80% of the population are in sync. As a result, 80% of the people want to find the other half from the 20% of the population, and 20% of the people also want to match the mate from their "class".
As is the case, the sentence that everyone sees on the Internet is "I just prefer to be lacking, I just want to stay by the rabbit, I just don't believe that the best people of the opposite sex in the whole world are blind."
Speaking of this, the author really wants to say: you save it, if you are really as good as you think, you will not let the excellent opposite sex in the whole world be collectively blind in front of you.
From another point of view, the more excellent older single young people, the less worthy of sympathy, or even unsympathetic.
Because the "appetite" of such people is extremely tricky, it is by no means what they call "inappropriate" and "to find a conversation".
They just have other plans, and behind the seemingly emotionally weak people, there is a huge ambition hidden.
At this point, young men and women are the same. It is not that you can't meet the high-quality "opposite sex", but with the increase of age, the supply will be less and less, even if you encounter high-quality opposite sex, you may not be able to get it.
The influence of the family of origin
In fact, the main reason why today's young people are "difficult to get married" is that the "three views" are only secondary. Don't believe it, you ask the people around you about the criteria for choosing a mate, stable work income, dual-time employee retirement parents and other factors, the probability will be in the front, the last item is "three views match".
The so-called "three views" are, in the final analysis, the influence of the original family on a person's growth. At present, the elderly unmarried young people are mostly post-90s, and there will not be too many brothers and sisters in the family. Only children make up the majority, no more than three at most.
Because since childhood, he has been a "rare treasure" at home, and he wants the moon not to give the stars to the master. After growing up, the personality cultivated by the original family will extend to marriage and love, which in turn will affect the major events of marriage. The most immediate problem is that it goes their separate ways without saying a word.
The author knows a little brother, the Spring Festival blind date, two months pregnant, May 1 rushed to get married, June 1 rushed to do divorce procedures.
Think deeply
Finally, I would like to respond again to the question of "why is it difficult to get married".
In the final analysis, the current marriage has a certain purpose, and it is no longer simply to marry for the sake of marriage.
Many people want to rely on marriage to achieve the possibility of crossing classes.
However, the author still wants to advise: it is not impossible to use the "marriage" method to achieve a salted fish turnaround, but think twice.
Countless bitter lessons tell us that a marriage without a love foundation is a "stud" gamble, and the probability of losing is extremely high.