-01-
One night in the Song Dynasty, the gongs and drums were noisy, the laughter was full of laughter, and the joy was jubilant.
The west window is lit with candles, the cheers are continuous, the bride is smiling, and the groom is affectionate.
Everyone congratulated, and the combination of the two people's love and concubine intentions will surely be a good story in the future.
After marriage, she added incense to his red sleeves, and he met her poetry and books, but he did not know that this beautiful marriage did not last for two years, and the bride was suspended from writing and returned to her mother's house.
Only because a man cannot resist his mother, his own woman cannot give birth, he cannot disobey his parents' orders, and he can only send his wife out of the house.
This man is Lu You, and his wife is his cousin, Tang Wan.
He did not want to let go, but in that era of "no filial piety has three, no posterity is greater", he can only choose to give up his love.
He secretly placed Tang Wan in the courtyard outside, but not long after, his mother found out, married another wife for him, and beat the Mandarin duck.
The woman was taken back to her mother's house, and soon after, she sought another marriage.
I thought that this matter would end here, and from then on, the end of the world was far away, and the meeting was indefinite, she took her Yangguan Road, and he crossed his canoe bridge.
Who knows, once on a visit to the garden, two people came to a big collision of fate, and Lu You wrote down a famous sentence throughout the ages:
Red crispy hands, yellow wine. The city is full of spring color palace wall willows. East Wind Evil. The joy is thin. A few years of sorrow. Wrong, wrong, wrong.
Spring is as old as ever. People are empty and thin. The tear stains are red and the fish is soaked. Peach blossoms fall. Idle Pool Pavilion. Although the mountain alliance is there, the Jinshu is difficult to trust. Momomo.
Tang Wan saw this word, and when she returned home, she fell ill and died.
Love to the depths is a tragedy.
-02-
From ancient times to the present, it seems that all love stories, if they are stained with the four words of "lingering pity", most of them will have a little tragic color.
We all like to have lovers who eventually become dependents, but often the reality is that the greater the expectation, the more the ending will be disappointed.
Life is short, how much love is like a flash in the pan, the first sight is amazing, the goodbye is unforgettable, after concluding a good relationship, but under the sword blade of reality, it is cut to blood.
Love in this world, like the sky that is suddenly sunny and rainy, makes people uncertain, and love and hatred are the most entangled.
Originally, each had its own fate, each had its own journey, but suddenly, a red dust rolled in, Wushan Clouds and Rain, he became her lover, she became his beauty.
But how many people, in deep love, insist, but also by various contradictions in life, for example, the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can not be solved, poor and lowly couples Pepsi lament, the gap between the two people is getting bigger and bigger, and even the chat has begun to "cross the service"...
Originally thought that it would be the people who could keep each other safe and stable in the world, and have been whiteheads until they were old, but when they raised their eyebrows and raised their hands, there was a time staggering, and when they woke up, the people they loved changed their appearance.
As a result, all kinds of contradictions keep appearing, quarrels continue, all kinds of heartache are tormented, and each other's inner complaints about each other's lack of understanding are becoming more and more frequent...
Perhaps, people who love each other deeply, what they are most afraid of is that they are too tired to get along.
-03-
Zhang Ailing once said a sentence: Feelings are originally fragile, can withstand wind and rain, but can not withstand the ordinary.
Deeply.
Many times, there are always people who think that two people are married, that is, love has reached its peak, but this is not the case. For those who love deeply, marriage is only the first step in the beginning of love.
Love is a matter of two people, and marriage is a matter of two families.
Just like Lu You and Tang Wan, originally thought that they were harmonious with each other, but they did not know that the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has been a big problem since ancient times, moreover, they are also mixed with "offspring", which was the most important purpose of marrying a daughter-in-law in ancient times, it can be seen that the deeper they love each other, the more they are a great torture for each other.
Perhaps, when I was in love, I read Cangyang Gyatso's poem: You see or don't see, I am there, not sad or happy...
How wonderful.
And after marriage, reading this poem again, it becomes to see or not see, all are chai rice oil and salt, all are chickens and dogs, all are the social interactions of various relatives, and the boredom of all kinds of complicated trivia...
Therefore, even if two people love each other deeply, if they cannot come up with a heart of mutual understanding and mutual understanding, and cannot communicate and understand more, then most of them will let each other's deep feelings be consumed little by little in contradictions.
-04-
Yishu once said:
The biggest mistake people make on a daily basis is to be too polite to strangers and too harsh to intimate people, to change this bad habit and balance the world.
There are always women who say that he used to let me, whatever I said, he listened to me, but at the moment, he always came to me.
There are always men who say that she used to be gentle as water, obedient and sensible, and filial to my parents, but at the moment, she doesn't want to care about anything in the family.
Ask the other person, still love? Will answer: Of course love.
But why in the present, the eyes are full of various non-beings and shortcomings of the other party.
Once "she is making trouble, he is laughing", once "across the mountains and seas, but also to hold each other's hands", once "walk to protect the other party inside", once "see him, the eyes will appear stars"...
In the moment, it all becomes: I feel very tired and tired of love.
Only because, less understanding, less contrasting pain, less of the most important point in the relationship: protection.
Life is complicated, the more you live later, the greater the pressure on people, the more you want to find someone who can pad a cushion, can give yourself a little energy, but the people around you, but will always blindly complain, blindly complain, so the feelings are getting farther and farther away.
In "Thirty Only", Chen Yu said angrily to Zhong Xiaoqin: They all say that marriage is a safe haven, who gets married and starts a family, not to live a solid life?
Zhong Xiaoqin replied: "They all want to avoid the wind, who will come to be the port?"
Love, should be mutual. Don't seek to understand each other's sorrows and joys, but we must know the cold and warm.
Otherwise, no matter how deeply you love, it is also a kind of torture for each other.
-05-
Zhou Guoping once said a sentence:
Love is heartache without reason and tolerance without preconditions.
Women, always the more pampered, the more gentle; men are always more adored, the more they know how to care and tolerate.
Therefore, the most taboo thing about a family is to encounter problems, not two people working hand in hand, but blaming each other.
In the face of the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, if a man cannot take out his own backbone, follow his mother to blame the daughter-in-law, or he has no ability to deal with the problem, cannot be pacified at both ends, cannot be a lubricant, but does the fuse, then, it will only make the contradiction between the daughter-in-law and the mother-in-law grow larger and larger;
And women, if they can't take an attitude towards their mother-in-law, be preoccupied, and be more truthful everywhere, then they will only feel that they are wronged;
In the face of the gradual separation between husband and wife, if men can't come up with their own attitudes, spoil their own women, and take good care of her, but they will be more and more competitive, and in case of machismo, the contradictions between so many and a half people will become more and more difficult to reconcile;
And women, if they always think that they should be treated as "children", need to be spoiled by men, always think that men do not hurt her, always complain about repeatedly, or talk continuously, so many men who love you deeply will also feel tired.
……
Some people who always thought they loved each other deeply eventually became each other's enemies.
Love cannot always be vigorous, but it is not after walking into the dull, indifferent to each other.
Love needs to be in the middle of time, he cares about you, you hurt him.
True deep love is not saying "can't do without you", "the person you love the most, only you"... Rather, in the two people together, warm to each other, support each other.
As the saying goes, "In this world, there is no best love, there is no most beautiful scenery, only the best people who treat you", so if two people love deeply, take out their own attitude and action, don't be a hero on the mouth.
If it is really to the point of torturing each other, feeling uncomfortable with each other, and seeing each other, you feel that you can't live, then pat the dust on your body and say goodbye!
Life is a long road, and there really isn't that much time to waste.
Author, Frank Fox
Figure, network
May you find in my words the ordinary years, a strong affection! Thanks for your attention!