Text/Themi Mama (original article, welcome to share and forward personally)
Let's start by asking you a question: Will you buy a house for your daughter?
In fact, all along, the folk have a tacit standard:
If it is a family with a son, for the sake of the son's marriage, the parent must prepare a car and a house and a bride price, but if it is a daughter, it is actually not necessary.
However, with the growth and marriage of only children in the 90s, many parents have also changed this idea, believing that whether it is a daughter or a son, as long as the child needs, they should help.
Even some parents believe that even if there is only one daughter, in order for the daughter to find a partner in the future, the waist pole can be harder, and they will buy a house for their daughter to buy a car.
But sometimes, maybe when we do, new problems arise that catch people off guard.
01. "After buying a house for my daughter, I regretted it"
Aunt Sun is 60 years old this year, she and her wife only have one daughter, is the pearl in the palm of Aunt Sun, and has been spoiled since childhood.
After the daughter graduated, she stayed in the big city to work, Aunt Sun and her wife were still at home, originally Aunt Sun wanted to let her daughter go back to her hometown to work, and even in order to let her daughter return to her hometown, Aunt Sun also bought a house in her hometown county.
Despite this, the daughter insisted on staying in the big city.
Later, once, Aunt Sun and her wife went to visit their daughter and walked around for a few days, but when they saw their daughter's living environment, the old couple was very distressed.
After returning home, as soon as she gritted her teeth, Aunt Sun and her wife sold the house in the county town, plus some savings of the old couple for so many years, and bought a small two-room set for their daughter in the big city.
Seeing that there is a house, the daughter's marriage has not been settled, Aunt Sun asked about the situation several times, and the daughter said: "I have a house now, and I can see it for ordinary people." ”
Aunt Sun's daughter is now 31 years old and has no boyfriend, and Aunt Sun and her wife are also more and more worried.
At the same time, the matter of buying a house for his daughter has also become a thorn in the heart of the old couple, who already knew the current situation and would not have bought a house for their daughter no matter what.
02. After buying a house for her daughter, the 3-point feeling of a 60-year-old mother is thought-provoking
Speaking of giving her daughter a full amount of money to buy a house in a big city, Aunt Sun also has a lot of feelings, specifically, there are three points, which have resonated with many people.
The economy is under pressure
Although Aunt Sun only has one daughter and does not spend money on her, if you empty your savings and buy a house for your daughter, there will be many follow-up problems.
For example, the daughter will always marry in the future, if the daughter stays in the big city, then how to solve the pension problem of Aunt Sun and his wife?
In addition, because the family is hollowed out, it will also face a lot of economic pressure, it seems that buying a house is a good thing, but if the step is too big, it will produce many drawbacks.
The house has nothing to do with itself
Buying a house for his daughter seems to be contributing to his own money, but as his daughter marries, it is difficult for him to live in this house, and it is bound to have nothing to do with himself.
You are like Aunt Sun and the old two, you live in your hometown, the house you bought for your daughter is a big city, not to mention living all year round, you can see it once a year, it is a very luxurious thing.
Wait until the daughter gets married in the future, then the house is big or small, the decoration is good or bad, in fact, in the end, it has nothing to do with the old two, and it is also lamentable to say.
After buying a house, the daughter spent a lot of money and did not even rush to get married
Many people spend their whole lives struggling to buy a house and a car, but if they are young and these things are realized, then it is easy to have high requirements for some things.
For example, Aunt Sun's daughter, since buying a house, spending money is not very frugal, every time she is extravagant, this is the rear is guaranteed, there is no scruples.
In addition, there is no hurry to get married, and the requirements for the other half will be higher, and under careful selection, it will be later and later to get married slowly.
This is undoubtedly a kind of torment for the old man who is looking forward to holding his grandson.
03. Do you want to buy a house for your daughter? Consider the actual situation
In fact, as a parent, whether to buy a house for your daughter in the end, do not have to think so much, just need to consider their own actual situation.
For example, if the family conditions are superior, then there is no need to worry, so that the daughter can live better, which is also what parents want to see.
However, for the general family situation, try not to punch the swollen face and be fat, after all, the children and grandchildren have their own children and grandchildren, we must take care of ourselves first, and the children themselves will also have their own life and way out.
Of course, if the house can not be bought, then we can also comprehensively consider their own actual situation, you can pay a down payment to the child, let the child go to the monthly payment every month, help if you can help, can not help, let the child to fight by himself, perhaps this is the best choice.
Finally, I would like to ask you, do you think you should buy a house for your daughter?