In this life, people want to be loved, whether they have a partner who is in love with each other, or in front of their parents who have raised themselves, they all hope to be surrounded by full love.
But not everyone is so lucky. When you get married, you also go to your parents with the goal of happiness, but in fact, no one can predict how the marriage will be run.
If you can't go on, can you go back to your loving parents? This problem seems simple, but when it comes to really facing it, some women are embarrassed. There is no way forward, what about the way back?
Zhang Hua (pseudonym), who has been married for 7 years, did not survive the 7-year itch, and the marriage came to an end. To be honest, she didn't want to go on for a day, but every time she mentioned divorce, her parents would stop her.
Yes, in this small county, many people are familiar with each other. Although divorce is not a shameful thing in this era, it will make parents very faceless in front of acquaintances who look up and do not look down.
Therefore, Zhang Hua's parents have been bitterly advising her not to divorce easily, on the one hand, it is not good for the children, on the other hand, the life after the divorce is also very painful.
However, feelings are like people drinking water, cold and warm self-knowledge, whether marriage is suitable, their own hearts know best. The husband is not motivated, often talking with people behind her back, as for whether there is substantive behavior, it is just that Zhang Hua did not catch the form.
The lover's eyes could not tolerate sand, and when he thought of the time in the next few decades, his heart was as uncomfortable as swallowing a fly, and with the despair of looking at his head, Zhang Hua really couldn't bear it.
She thought that she had made her mind clear, that her parents could understand, and that after the divorce, her parents would open their arms and provide a warm shelter for themselves and their daughters. However, his mother's words made Zhang Hua fall into contemplation.
Mother and daughter are connected, when the mother where there is hope that the daughter will live in the depths of the water. Seeing that Zhang Hua is unhappy, her parents are also anxious, but they think that divorce is not the fundamental solution to the problem.
Because after the divorce, where Zhang Hua wants to live, this is the first problem to be solved. The house they lived in after marriage was Zhang Hua's husband's pre-marital room, and the two of them should not have much savings in recent years.
Once divorced, it means that Zhang Hua will lose a stable residence, and after several years of marriage, Zhang Hua has nothing but a daughter.
Although her parents can let her live in her mother's house, this is not a long-term solution, after all, Zhang Hua still has her brother, and her parents and sister-in-law live together.
In addition, Zhang Hua's daughter is still in kindergarten, and if she goes to work, the child will not be picked up and taken care of, which is also a very important issue.
Her parents were able to help her for a while, but her brother-in-law had two children there, who were also chickens and dogs, and they were already exhausted in terms of energy and physical strength alone, so how could they accept their daughters and granddaughters for a long time?
Everyone is crowded together, there are many people, and there will inevitably be many contradictions, rather than making trouble at that time, it is better to refuse her daughter to return to her mother's house at the beginning.
Her mother gave Zhang Hua an example of this series of questions, and after she listened to it, she realized that divorce is really not so simple.
In the past, I just wanted to quickly free myself from marriage, thinking that my parents blocked me because I simply cared about face, and when it came to things, I thought that I was not ready to face everything after divorce.
After sorting out these problems, Zhang Hua began to re-plan his future life.
Her relationship with her husband can no longer go on, but she can't divorce herself in a vacuum. Liquidated the deposits in the hands of the two, assumed custody of their daughters, and mortgaged a small apartment with the help of their parents.
Fortunately, the house price in the county is not too high, and in addition to her formal job, she has worked part-time as an accountant for two small companies, and the problem of repaying the monthly payment is not big.
Although the husband is lazy about marriage, he is always responsible for his daughter and agrees on monthly maintenance. Zhang Hua finally divorced, and her parents considered her temporary difficulties and temporarily lived in her house to help her take care of her children.
Zhang Hua, who was still indignant because he could not go back to his mother's house after divorce, finally understood his parents' good intentions, and only relying on his will and deeds could not solve the problem.
After the divorce, can I go back to my mother's house? There is nothing wrong with this problem.
First of all, women who marry are already adults and have the ability to live alone. Although it is a fortunate thing to live a happy life, it is not a good life, and you cannot regard your mother's family as a complete retreat.
Because when you make every decision, you have to be careful, on the premise of being responsible for yourself. After all, the road is your own way, even if your parents regard you as a treasure in the palm of your hand, they cannot replace you.
The parents' home, from their own adulthood, is no longer their own destination, short-term residence can be, long-term dependence of the idea, it will be eliminated as soon as possible.
Your parents raised you to adulthood and have accomplished their task, and the next step must be carried out by yourself.
The happiness of marriage is also the result of your own choices.
There may be parental opinions mixed in, but an adult must have the ability to carry his own life. You can't think of relying on others and seeking help from others as soon as you encounter things, even if the other person is your parent.
You're doing well, and your parents can't take it away. If you are doing poorly, your parents may pity you, feel sorry for you, and may help you, but they also have the right to refuse to help you.
Therefore, at any time, do not regard others as your backer, no matter who the other person is.
You know, only by relying on yourself and making yourself strong can you live a truly happy life.
END.