Woman, when your husband no longer loves you, what else can you do to prove your happiness?
When one day your love is taken away by someone else, when your marriage is interfered with by another woman, do you dare to say that you are still a happy woman?
That woman took away my love, took my husband, and wanted to take away my family.
In order to force me to make a step back, my husband once beat me up and did not let me get upset. The woman scolded me, saying that I was not worthy of my husband, that I should have divorced her sooner and given him to her.
What can I do, what can I do...
The above is from a marriage case, which is a woman's self-questioning and self-answering, and the logic is simple and straightforward.
A woman's cry inadvertently tells a very realistic emotional problem that exists in many marriages and families.
In her account, ever since her husband had a woman out there, her love has disappeared. The marriage continues, but the feelings of the husband and wife are getting colder and colder.
The husband empathizes with the other, and there is nothing she can do. Love is taken away, she can only retreat to the second place, try to protect the family.
In the face of her husband's big fight, she vowed never to divorce, forced to die, and maintained the last bit of stubbornness. In the face of the woman's aggressive momentum, she pretended to be happy in marriage, unwilling to let go of the last shred of dignity and want to spend time with her to the end.
Marriage is not good, divorce is inseparable. Whenever she felt desperate for the future, she would ask herself what to do. She thought about it for a long time, but she never found the answer she wanted...
If you were this woman, what would you do in this situation?
First, every woman has ever had love
Next, I will tell you about this lady's marriage case. In her tone, I will only tell the truth, and I will sort it out a little to improve readability.
Women, even if they are no longer young, still long for love. It's just that women like me, because their identity is too low, a lot of inner words are more and more afraid to express.
Every woman has had a romantic time. At that time, I also had love, but unfortunately people's hearts are fickle, and now the love has long since ceased to belong to me, and even the marriage is about to break up...
More than ten years ago, when I first met love, I thought I was the luckiest woman under the heavens. The only time I fell in love in my life, Heaven arranged for me to have a man with both talents and good looks.
Except for the bad family conditions, he was fine everywhere. Tall, highly educated, sunny and handsome, humorous, decisive, many girls around him all day.
I aspired to be his friend, but unfortunately we were just ordinary colleagues. I was naïve at the time, happy to have a few words with him, and occasionally blushed.
I can't tell you how shy it felt, but I knew I had quietly fallen in love with him. I want to see him every day, but I don't dare to be sentimental. Never dared to take the initiative to talk to him, for fear of blushing in front of him.
At that time, I was also confused, how could a man as good as him look up to me? A lot of people have a crush on him, they are better than me, braver than me, how can they get my turn...
I didn't expect him to take the initiative to pursue me, maybe this is the arrangement of fate. One day he suddenly confessed to me, saying that he liked me for a long time and was willing to love me for a lifetime, take care of me for a lifetime, and never die.
Looking into his sincere, clear eyes, I was touched by him. Like a dream, the sweet words I most longed to hear suddenly came to my heart and warmed my heart.
One night a few days later, I made a bold decision. I was willing to be with him, I gave myself to him and he was my man ever since.
In love, we have faced many ups and downs. First of all, my parents disagreed, and secondly, his ex-girlfriend often obstructed us.
For the sake of love, I had nothing to fear and followed him with a dead heart. Even if many people don't look favorably on us, no one can stop my determination to love him.
Of course, this is the power of love, and in this life I have identified him and want to go on with him forever. I hope to love only this person in my life and never regret it...
Second, the pressure of life changes the initial love
The days of love are beautiful and romantic, and I always trust my instincts and can never love the wrong person. After falling in love for 1 year and 3 months, I finally persuaded my parents to marry him as they wished and become his bride.
When we first got married, our family conditions were not good, but our feelings were very deep. Even if life is hard and tired, I have never abandoned him and am willing to suffer with him. Even if we can only rent a house, it is still our warm little home.
Of course, at that time, he was also very good and careful.
He also bought me cosmetics, clothes, and often surprised me. Even if I made a small mistake carelessly, he never bothered with me. Whenever my hometown farmer is busy, he always rushes to the front...
You say, is this kind of marriage considered happy?
Although we are not as rich as other people's families, our love is very sincere. Go to work and leave work together every day, and go home together to cook and eat. Caring for each other, taking care of each other, working hard for common life goals, even my parents who once opposed us praised me for having a good eye.
Like many happy couples, when we are fine at night, we go out hand in hand for a walk and a walk. This should be the best way to look at love, even if I look back now, I still feel that those days were really happy.
I don't know what's wrong, although we have been working hard, but life has always stood still. Time goes by day by day, we all gradually feel the pressure, and unconsciously there are feelings of resistance in the feelings.
Especially after having children, life suddenly became difficult. Sometimes I can't help but lose my temper with him, not because I don't hate him, but because I feel that life is really too difficult.
For a while, I was very upset. Can the pressures of life really change the first love?
As soon as others get married, they have a big house, we have all been married for 3 and a half years, the children are 2 years old, but they can only rent a house, why is this, is love wrong...
Maybe life is too stressful, and love seems to have lost its meaning. In the 4th year of marriage, we quarreled for almost 1 whole year. Once there was a heated argument and I took a gamble to file for divorce.
My mother-in-law apologized to me and begged me to give him a chance not to get a divorce for the sake of the children.
In fact, I am just talking about anger, I still love him deeply, I just want to give him a little pressure, I hope he will do something serious. At that time, even if my mother-in-law didn't persuade me, I was reluctant to really divorce...
Third, the collision of marriage reality and life dreams
Why should I argue with him? Because hating iron is not steel, it is the collision of the reality of marriage and the dream of life.
I also blamed my short-sightedness at that time, and I only saw the gains and losses of a moment. On many issues, I underestimated my husband's determination and ability.
In that year, I was very distressed, and other people's husbands knew to find something to do, and work overtime to subsidize the family. My husband daydreamed all day, delusionally trying to get a meritorious name, delusional to ascend to the heavens one step at a time...
Yes, he wanted to take the civil service exam, which was his dream all along. Before getting married, he studied hard every day, and he was still learning after marriage.
It's not me hitting him, so many people competing, how easy is it for him to come out and talk about it?
He studied hard for several years, failing every year and taking exams every year. He didn't care about my feelings and spent his spare time studying!
Did you know that the child's milk powder money has to save money, and he is indifferent, and he continues to dream when he returns home from work!
To be honest, he was so unenterprising, how could I not be angry? Because of this matter, we quarreled many times in that year.
I told him: Failure is not the mother of success, we just don't have that life. You are also a big person, it is time to face reality. Stop making unnecessary efforts and take care of the life in front of you. I don't want you to walk in the clouds, I just want you to cheer up. When will you be able to be a little more down-to-earth, and do you really want to live? Since getting married, you have delayed me year after year, have you considered my feelings...
Maybe I didn't speak rationally enough and hurt his heart, but I had too much pain in my heart, and I was telling the truth.
I don't want him to take the exam anymore, not that I don't have a different heart than him. I loved him so much that I hated iron not steel. I want him to do something that really makes sense, not always drilling the horns and not walking into dead ends.
At that time, life was too stressful, and whenever I was emotionally excited, I didn't understand what he was doing. He was almost terrified, wanting a way to go to the black.
I am a paranoid person, I always think that poverty is not terrible, the terrible thing is that he is lazy because he is poor. I am afraid that he will give up on himself because of this, and I am afraid that he will lose himself in one failure after another!
One day we had a fight, and I burned all his books. Clearly tell him to let go of his fantasies and stop dreaming. We had a heated argument that day, almost on the verge of divorce.
Although we did not divorce, that quarrel affected our later life.
I really didn't expect that he was actually admitted that year, and since then he has had a "golden rice bowl", and he has changed his destiny, and I am happy for him...
Fourth, 10 years of marriage, from pride to inferiority
He won the meritorious examination, and I was really happy for him, and I burst into tears with excitement.
Only then did I understand that I was wrong to blame him, that I had underestimated him. He wasn't selfish, all his efforts were for the sake of his family.
Although I was a little ashamed, I was still proud of his success.
He finally changed our lives with his own efforts, and gradually made me look up in front of my friends. My vision is not wrong, married to such a good husband...
In the next 6 years, our lives got better and better. I had my own house and bought a car. Everything went in the direction we had originally agreed, as if happiness were everywhere for the rest of our lives.
Unfortunately, once some people succeed, their vision is high. I hate myself for understanding it too late and being negligent about emotional issues. By the time I suddenly realized, it was too late.
Since the beginning of the previous year, I hope that we will have a second treasure. But my husband always disagreed, as if something was hiding from me. He gradually became grumpy, unwilling to talk about the topic of erbao, unwilling to touch me, and even a little disgusted with me.
It didn't take long for me to find out in my anxiety that he had cheated on him. He was so close to a woman that he had already done everything, and I finally understood...
I never thought he would do this to me, and my heart was almost broken that day. Not only did he not admit his mistakes, but he also advised me not to disturb them, and it was better to fulfill them. We had a fight and he hit me and made me calm.
I scolded the woman and told her to leave my husband. Not only was she not ashamed, but she also said I didn't deserve my husband. It is better to divorce her early and give up her husband to her.
I almost took a gamble to reflect on it and let them be punished as they deserved. But my mother-in-law suddenly knelt down to me, crying and begging me not to ruin his son's future...
In fact, I don't want to tear my face, and I don't have such a cruel heart. For the sake of the child, I had to put up with this breath. I turned a blind eye to what they were doing.
I endured them for more than 1 year and lived for the sake of my family.
No one understood my humility and awkwardness, not even myself, why I was so stubborn.
I gave in again and again, but they were aggressive and exhausted me. Life is getting harder and harder every day, I have lost the direction of life, and perhaps I will gradually lose hope.
My only mistake was to underestimate him and not support him. In fact, it was not distrust of him, but an expression of love, and I had always loved him deeply.
But he said: We have long since disagreed, I have accompanied you for 10 years, and I have done my best to be kind and righteous...
Maybe from then on, in my husband's heart, I became a woman who was not worthy of love. Maybe he had already thought about this day and only hated me for being too self-righteous and understanding too late.
10 years of marriage, a blink of an eye, how small was the original love, how fragile were those so-called happiness? From pride to inferiority, it's like a moment, how natural...
Fifth, some marital problems are not solved
That day my husband told me: more than 1 year, it is time for divorce, I don't want to force you, you don't want to force me. Don't say that I live realistically, life is originally realistic, that's what you said to me in the first place! Please understand that I love her more than I did in the first place. Different levels of people have different lives, and she and I are the same level of people. If it weren't for the children, I would have divorced you a long time ago. But after all, I have loved one, and I only hope that we will end peacefully...
I will talk about this marriage case here, and there is no follow-up to a woman's story some time ago. This lady did not want to leave when she died, but her husband had an iron heart to leave.
Before writing this article, I heard a colleague's sister say that the reason why this man is determined to divorce may be because he has a child with the woman, almost 1 year old...
I do not express too many views on this case, nor do I evaluate right or wrong. Sort out a context, truthfully narrate, I believe that everyone who comes over has their own opinion.
Many people have encountered similar marital and emotional problems, and it is a very difficult thing for lovers to empathize with each other. Not only is it impossible to dissuade, it is also difficult to turn back. The deeper the love, the more seriously it hurts, until it is completely dead and leaves the scene.
This is not nonsense, you will understand it when you see it more.
If you haven't experienced that kind of pain, you won't know the bumps in the road. After going through it, you will gradually understand the true sorrow of marriage.
Some emotional problems are indeed insoluble, and if it is difficult to walk with different hearts, one day she will be alone. In the case of this marriage, maybe divorce is her best bet, unless she can stick to it to the end, it's too difficult.
She loves the wrong person, it is not a question of her acceptance and non-acceptance, but a real problem that cannot be avoided. Although the divorce is not willing, it can also be regarded as letting go of yourself. Be brave, dry your tears, and maybe regain your pride and confidence.
Of course, there is a cycle of cause and effect, and there is always a price for dividing and merging. Even if she divorced, she could not be abandoned by him for no reason.
This marriage case tells us that we often say that life is like a drama, a drama is like life, and sometimes it is true.
Is there a right or wrong play? It's all your own choice. As she said, how small was the original love, and how fragile was the so-called happiness?
This sentence is actually a form of fate, you once really did not trust his ability, how can you expect him to give you a lifetime of happiness?
As a woman, emotional issues cannot contradict themselves, and so can men. Always remember that some people can share suffering and cannot share happiness, so that you are dumb and eat yellow lian. The biggest confidence in life is to improve yourself. As for those who abandon their families, they may not be able to live better, so let's talk about it.