01
It is said that "Yuezi Revenge" is unforgettable in a lifetime.
After a woman gives birth, both the body and the mind are reshaping, with the sudden increase in hormone levels in the body, this time is indeed more irritable and more like to drill the horn tip, so at this time, if unpleasant things happen, it is often easier to make people think.
Most of the "confinement feuds" are more daughter-in-law and mother-in-law, most of them are mother-in-law or mothers to take care of the confinement after childbirth, the mother naturally needless to say, everything must listen to the daughter, mainly the daughter's body.
But the mother-in-law is different, most of the mother-in-law is based on newly born babies, rarely care about the mother's body and mood, contradictions are naturally easy to produce.
Moreover, women are already weak after giving birth, even if there is a contradiction, they cannot resist, they can only endure, and the "moon feud" is planted in the heart.
02
The relationship between Xiao Jing and her mother-in-law has always been very poor, the mother-in-law is more snobbish, she wants her husband to find a rich daughter-in-law, but the husband and Xiao Jing are in agreement, but they can only reluctantly let them get married, although they agreed to the marriage, but after marriage, the mother-in-law's difficulty with Xiao Jing has never been less.
Xiao Jing has no culture, because the family values sons over daughters, and when the book is read in junior high school, xiao Jing will not be allowed to continue reading, and there is no way for Xiao Jing to drop out of school and break out.
The mother-in-law is quite dissatisfied with Xiao Jing's academic qualifications, after all, her son is a famous university graduate, and she always feels that Xiao Jing has climbed their home, and from time to time she will speak ill of Xiao Jing.
Because the mother-in-law is not optimistic about the marriage between Xiaojing and her husband, and did not buy a marriage room for two people, Xiaojing has been living in her in-laws' house after marriage, looking at her mother-in-law's face every day, fortunately, although Xiaojing's work is not good, she still has a job, earns her own money to spend, and will not send people to live under the fence.
Although the mother-in-law always said that she earned that little money was not enough to plug her teeth, it was better to resign and go home to wash and cook and help the family do some work, but Xiao Jing did not care, the mother-in-law said her, Xiao Jing did her own.
Not long after the marriage, Xiaojing became pregnant, which was supposed to be a happy time, who knew that this was just the beginning of the escalation of the conflict between her and her mother-in-law.
From the beginning of pregnancy, the mother-in-law nagged every day not to let Xiao Jing go to work again, to raise a good fetus at home, at first Xiao Jing refused, but once because the work was too tired and uncomfortable, she agreed to the mother-in-law's suggestion to resign at home.
During the pregnancy period, the mother-in-law also became extremely diligent, every day the big fish and big meat to Xiao Jing to eat, the mouth is also a left one right one can not be hungry my grandson, Xiao Jing knows that the mother-in-law is not good to her, all for the baby in the belly.
Unfortunately, Xiao Jing gave birth to a daughter, at that time in the hospital mother-in-law turned her face, did not wait to see the child at a glance to pack up things and go home, fortunately Xiao Jing's husband to give strength, but also to take care of the child and take care of Xiao Jing, finally also survived to the discharge home.
Xiao Jing was discharged from the hospital, and her husband was also going to work, so she could only let her mother-in-law help take care of Xiao Jing, after all, Xiao Jing was a caesarean section and was still very weak. The mother-in-law promised to be fine in front of her husband, but as soon as the husband went to work, the mother-in-law went out to go shopping with other old ladies, and did not care about Xiaojing and the children.
Xiao Jing could only endure the pain to feed the child to sleep, and could not even eat a meal for a day.
For several days in a row, the mother-in-law is this kind of operation, and occasionally the mood is good to give Xiao Jing a steamed bun pickle to eat, and the child does not even look at it.
Xiao Jing originally wanted to endure it for a while, but there was no food to eat her own milk, she still chose to talk to her husband about her mother-in-law, who knew that in the face of her husband's questioning, her mother-in-law did not have a little remorse: "I am so old, I have not served anyone, I will not serve people, especially an outsider!" "
The mother-in-law's words are really word for word, Xiao Jing feels that she really can't stay in the in-laws' house, and her husband does not want Xiao Jing to be wronged, so the two people moved out of the mother-in-law's house and rented a small house to live on their own.
Because Xiao Jing was very weak after giving birth and no one took care of her, her husband also resigned from his job to take care of Xiao Jing for a while, during which the two people felt that going to work was too passive, or they should do some business to be free.
So the two people took out the money saved in recent years to open a shop, although Xiao Jing's education is not high, but the eloquence is very good, the person is also very affinity, the work is more orderly, the size of the store is Xiao Jing's personal efforts, the store is becoming more and more prosperous.
Watching her son and daughter-in-law earn money, the mother-in-law could not sit still, she came to the store to see if there was nothing to do, asked where she could help, and offered to help take care of the children, but Xiaojing could not let go of what the mother-in-law did to her in the month, and she was not willing to take care of the mother-in-law.
Blind dates in the street all think that Xiao Jing's mother-in-law is very good, looks very kind old man, Xiao Jing every time she hears the neighbor say this, she just smacks her lips and smiles, what kind of mind the mother-in-law knows too well, but she wants money!
The days passed day by day, the mother-in-law's body was not as good as the day, and the memory was getting worse and worse, and finally one day I couldn't remember anything.
The mother-in-law has Alzheimer's disease and needs to have someone to take care of, at this time, relatives in the family hope that Xiaojing can take care of the elderly at home, after all, the mother-in-law has a son. But Xiao Jing just smiled and said, "I don't serve outsiders." "
In the end, the mother-in-law was sent to a nursing home, which may be the best place for her.
03
Good and evil will be rewarded in the end, and we often say that people live a lifetime, and to be kind to others is to be kind to oneself.
First: a wise mother-in-law will not have a feud with her daughter-in-law.
Every mother feels that her son is excellent, always picks and chooses her daughter-in-law, does not care about the occasion, and never considers whether to say hurtful things.
The usual quarrels between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will rarely cause substantial harm to one of them, but why is the unfair treatment in the confinement hurt people so much that they can be remembered for a lifetime?
The first is the sense of gap between prenatal and postpartum, most women will get queen-like treatment when they are pregnant, clothes to reach out and open their mouths, everyone takes care of her emotions, afraid that her mood is not good and the child is affected.
But as soon as the child landed, no matter how much the mother suffered, the whole family began to circle around the child, no one cared about the mother's body and mood, the child was good, even if he occasionally thought of the mother, he was asked to feed the child.
No milk is the fault of the mother, the child eats milk powder is the fault of the mother, the child's poor physique is also the fault of the mother, in short, no matter what problems the child has, it is because there is no good mother.
Many examples have proved that mothers-in-law who care about women before childbirth and have a sudden change in postpartum attitudes are often more likely to be resented by mothers than mothers-in-law who are not good for women before and after childbirth.
Secondly, after childbirth, the woman's body is the weakest and most in need of care, so there is such a thing as "making confinement", which shows that this time is to give the mother the time to cultivate and adjust her body and mind.
At this time, women are originally worried about how to take care of the newborn child, full of confusion about their future, it is difficult to accept the postpartum life, if the mother-in-law not only does not care about the psychology of the mother, but also blames her for everything, it will naturally aggravate the psychology of maternal anxiety. This is also the reason why postpartum women are easily depressed, and the harm suffered during this time is really difficult to forgive and hard to forget.
Hurtful words are like spilled water, but you can't take it back if you want to, so the wise mother-in-law must be careful in her words and deeds, and don't make a feud with her daughter-in-law.
Second: The biggest contradiction in the family is the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has been the biggest contradiction in the family since ancient times, and if the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is good, family life can be smoothed out a lot.
But there are always some differences in thinking between people, let alone the thoughts of two generations.
In fact, there was also a collision of ideas between children and parents before, but because of the family affection, no matter how big the contradiction is, it is not a contradiction, and the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are originally two people who do not know each other, and even the smallest contradiction is not easy to resolve.
In the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, most of them are mother-in-law who are picky about daughters-in-law, suspect of appearance, dislike of family, dislike of academic qualifications, and suspect of work, and hope that their sons can find someone as they wish.
But the daughter-in-law or the son himself to find, can meet the mother's requirements of the very few, did not look at the daughter-in-law married into the family, then naturally how to see how unpleasant, full of shortcomings, contradictions of course are indispensable.
The most effective way to avoid the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is to meet less.
As long as you don't meet, you can't find each other's problems, even if you find each other's problems, it is impossible to find trouble in the past without a roof, and you can still exchange gifts for the New Year's Festival, and even think that the other party is good.
If you must live together for some reason, do not live in a house, can be upstairs and downstairs, can be a community, as long as you ensure that something can be on call, so that not only can close the relationship, but also effectively prevent the occurrence of contradictions.
Of course, as the role of the husband, it is also necessary to play a role in lubricant, and to say more good things for each other in front of two people, to show the other party's concern, but also to ease the original tense relationship a lot.
Although the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a difficult problem of the century, it is not necessary for you to live and die, in fact, it is handled properly, and it can also be done to respect each other as guests.
Text/No Pen