A few days ago, a message rushed to the hot search:
In 2021, 2.139 million couples completed divorce registrations for the whole year, a figure that is about 43% lower than last year's registrations (3.733 million pairs).
What do you think of this data?
Netizens are naturally divided, and one comment seems very witty:
Although this sentence is a bit heartfelt, it also shows some facts at a certain level.
Modern society, whether it is men or women, is more cautious about entering marriage.
Unlike in the past, as long as it was a man, a woman, and a living person, they would just get together and get married at about the same age.
As for feelings, they are slowly run-in after marriage.
The generation of parents, even if the run-in is not good, the life is not happy enough, they will not easily divorce.
Because most of the older generation will regard divorce as a very humiliating thing, and it is not good to say it.
So whether it's good or not, at least on the surface it will maintain the appearance of a marriage.
And today's young people, first of all, from the step of marriage is very cautious, this point, look at the marriage rate of the past years can be seen;
If you are not happy after marriage, you are generally not willing to hide and endure, but choose to break up simply and neatly.
The data shows:
The post-80s generation is a relatively high divorce rate group, and among them, women mention divorce more first.
Why the post-80s?
Today we invite two middle-aged women in the post-80s and post-70s who are divorced and single, let them share their own mental journey.
Zhou Yan, 37 years old, company personnel
I would like to advise all unmarried girls not to marry "foolish filial piety men" when they marry.
The man you are looking for can have no money, no power, no ability, but he must not be foolish.
If you hadn't had the same experience as me, you simply wouldn't have understood what it would be like to marry a foolish filial man, or what a mother-in-law would experience in a chicken-flying dog-like marriage.
My former mother-in-law, an old lady of sixty years old, with clear ears and eyes, strong spirits, small but loud as a bell.
From the first day of marriage, I was picked up and called up to my house to teach me how to be the hostess of a family.
After she came, all the furniture in our house had to be moved according to her wishes, and even I didn't even have the right to hang clothes on the balcony.
The reason is that she thinks that the balcony hangs clothes to block her from basking in the sun, so let me buy a simple hanger and put the wet clothes in my bedroom to dry?
At first I ignored it, but I dried my clothes on the balcony as was my custom.
As a result, I came home from work that night and found all the wet clothes neatly arranged on my bed, wetting my mattress, pillows, and four-piece set.
I asked my mother-in-law why she did this, and she said innocently, "I see that the clothes are already dry, and I am kind enough to help you put them in." ”
I packed up my bags and went back to my mother's house that night, and my ex-husband came to intercede, saying that he would help take care of his mother in the future.
But you know, the foolish man couldn't do his promise at all.
The only thing he did was say weakly when I had a head-on conflict with his mother:
"Don't argue, don't worry."
I made the final showdown: if their mother and son insisted on going their own way, then I would not serve.
The ex-husband cowardly did not make any statement, and the ex-mother-in-law still went her own way and took my family as her home.
Now divorced, really liberated.
For the ex-husband's family, there is nothing to say, then I wish them mother and son to support each other for a lifetime.
Li Lin, 43 years old, is a company employee
My daughter graduated from college last year, successfully found a job, and began her professional career.
When I saw a picture of my child wearing a company badge sent to me, a sentence came to my mind:
My life's task is complete.
Many people will say, how to complete, do not you still have to watch the children get married, have a baby, and then help the child with the baby?
Generations of parents have not always done this.
No, I don't think so.
Today's children are different from ours, they don't have to get married and have children.
As long as I can find my place in society, have a self-supporting job, and have a skill to survive, I feel that I have raised my children to this extent, and I am very satisfied with myself and with my children.
As for getting married and having children, that's the daughter's own choice, and I don't want to interfere or urge.
To be honest, I don't think my daughter will have to be in the future, if I look back on these forty years of life, more than twenty years of married life, my conclusion is:
If a woman can support herself, she can actually not get married.
As early as my daughter's junior year, my ex-husband and I began a de facto separation.
I own a house and a small house for my daughter.
What I can do for my daughter is to make sure that in the future, in case she is hurt in her marriage, she has a safe haven that she can go back to whenever she wants.
That's right, until today I understand what a true "safe haven" is:
A shelter that allows you to hide, that gives you rest, that gives you a sense of security.
I often wonder why women should get married.
After a woman gets married, the first thing to face is all kinds of housework and various duties.
And these things unconsciously become a woman's obligation, as long as you are someone's wife, you have to do it.
When a woman becomes a mother, childcare is the most important thing for the rest of her life.
She will lose her career prospects, she will lose her time, and every day in her future she will have to circle around her children, and everything must be considered on the premise of children, otherwise everyone can come up and accuse her.
Divorcing at 43 is not an easy decision.
But I hope that at least for the rest of my life, I can live a little more freely.
discuss
The divorce rate has dropped by 43%, do you think this is a good thing or a bad thing? What do you think?
Feel free to share in the comments section.