In recent years, the two-child policy has been liberalized, and many neighbors and relatives have had a second child. I am an only son, many people persuade my parents to take advantage of their youth to ask for one, but my parents have refused... Yesterday I was homework again, old

In recent years, the two-child policy has been liberalized, and many neighbors and relatives have had a second child. I am an only son, many people persuade my parents to take advantage of their youth to ask for one, but my parents have refused... Yesterday I was doing my homework again, my father was smoking in the living room, and suddenly the power went out, but I was very happy, Threw the book away, and shouted to go to watch TV. Dad looked at my bouncing figure, took a deep breath of smoke, and was silent. At noon today, he announced at the dinner table that after family consultation, he was ready to have a child...

2, the cousin is almost thirty years old and has not found the object, looking for countless matchmakers to say that the media has not said it. Two days ago, I rode an electric car out to buy breakfast, but I didn't expect to be hit by a Porsche Cayenne that didn't brake the car. When he was hospitalized in the hospital, he fell in love with the little nurse who gave him injections. Every day, I keep pestering people to ask what kind of boys they really like. The little nurse was finally driven crazy by him and said: I like bad! The bad kind! My cousin smiled: "Then I just fit in, and I want to ask if the paralysis of the body is bad?"

3, adult interactions, sincere people are less and less. Society is very realistic, without money, no one can look up to you, it is difficult to meet nobles, and it is difficult to meet people who pull you by the hand. Fall in the wind and rain, you have to try to get up, don't wait for someone to hold an umbrella for you, you will be disappointed. Adults cut off friends, all are quiet, no quarrels. The feelings of people will change, change with the change of your identity, and change with the change of interests. The road that adults have to take, cold and warm self-knowledge, is sweet or bitter, slowly taste it yourself, do not have to find someone to complain about, and do not have to befriend anyone.

4. When I was a sophomore in college, there was a roommate in the dormitory who had been a single dog. A few of us changed several girlfriends, and he was still single. Now that he has graduated from college for many years, this dude is suddenly getting married. A few days before the wedding, he sent a text message to all the brothers. The guy said, "Brothers, I'm getting married soon, and before I get married, I have a request to send me the names of all the girlfriends you've talked about...

5, the wife has always been meticulous, advocating thrift. Every time, the egg whites left in the eggshell are smeared on the hands and even the face, saying that this is the best beauty skin care product for protein. Today, my son had a cold, and suddenly sneezed behind me in the kitchen, making a snot, and I scraped the snot with an eggshell. While cleaning up, the wife came in and habitually picked up the eggshell and smeared it on her face, evenly... He muttered, "There's more egg white left today!" Seeing this, I quickly took my son out of the kitchen.

6. Took two bottles of Wuliangye and went to the father-in-law's house to eat. When I arrived, I found my brother-in-law sitting on the sofa with a depressed face. I asked him what was wrong, and he said with a bitter face: "Today I was too back, I didn't stand still on the bus, I lost a handful of my uncle's hair, and I lost 36,000!" I was shocked: "Yo, this hair is so expensive?" The brother-in-law sighed, "Then he is not satisfied, saying that it was not easy to plant it." ”

7. Female colleagues take the driver's license. I failed three consecutive exams. The first time, she crashed a motorcycle parked on the side of the road; the second time, she crashed a Shali car parked on the side of the road; the third time, she crashed a Toyota car parked on the side of the road. The coach looked very guilty and comforted her: "Your driving skills have indeed not improved, but your vision has improved, and each time it is worth more than what you hit!" ”

8, female colleagues speak very exaggerated, we are not surprised. Just now she said that she was very serious about motion sickness, once took a bus, not yet to the place, felt too uncomfortable, asked the driver to stop urgently, got out of the car on the side of the road vomited diarrhea, diarrhea,,,

9, a few days ago, October 1, the second cousin was busy working and could not come back to give Grandpa a grave, last night only to plan to go this morning, which ever wanted to get up early in the morning and spread snow all over the mountains. There is no way but to go with the snow on their own, the family said that today's snow is too big, fortunately their memory is good, otherwise they can't find it. When I went to his house in the afternoon, I heard the wailing of my second cousin, and when I asked, I knew that my uncle was not at ease, and when I went to the mountain to find him, I found that my second cousin had gone to the wrong place and bumped into a pile of cow dung for half a day...

10, at night I and my wife got angry and ran away from home, walked for half a day there was no place to go to my parents' house, my mother learned the reason, had to rush me home, I was biased, lying on the sofa will not go, late at night lying on the sofa frozen can not sleep, then heard the bedroom door open, sit up to see is the nephew, the little guy holding the quilt: "Uncle, you are very cold, I secretly grandma sent you a quilt!" "I was touched by no, hard stuffed him for two hundred dollars, and then, when I covered it, I found that the quilt was wet and wet!"

1 Xiaohong: "When there are many people in the barbershop, I am embarrassed to go in and do it, I am too introverted." Xiaoming: "I used to be as shy as you, but when I got older, I didn't want to do so much, so I bought a pusher at home." ”

12, the sister-in-law is a bully, the college entrance examination scored 560 points, was admitted to Tsinghua University. When my sister-in-law took the train alone to school, the iPhone 11 phone she had just bought was stolen and she cried in front of the train station. The aunt who sold newspapers next to her couldn't bear it anymore and pointed to a man and said, "He's a thief, you ask him to go." So, the sister-in-law ran to the thief and cried: "I lost my mobile phone, I lost my mobile phone." Finally the thief got annoyed: "Don't cry, I'll steal a new one for you." ”

13, the female supervisor concealed her husband to give her brother 380,000, and her husband directly took her to go through the divorce procedures after she knew. I looked at the female supervisor very poorly, so I often accompanied her to eat and walk. Last night the two of us were walking in the park, and she suddenly stood still, facing me, her eyes slightly closed, her small mouth slightly open, and her breathing tight. At that time, my heart was pounding, and my heart was always hesitant to kiss it. I just leaned forward, I found that I really thought too much, the female supervisor this sneeze is really powerful!

14, visit the night market at night, buy a folding fan on a stall, I took a handful and asked the boss, how much, 10 yuan, I put the fan down, and took a few hands to pick and choose in that, then the side squatted two people in the fan, one of them picked up I just put down the fan and asked the boss, how much, 50 yuan, I listened, the price increased, immediately stood up, then found that the next squat is two foreigners. Then there was no then.