1, a female colleague fell out of love, she was drunk and sent a message: "Regardless of feelings, whoever gives half a million dowry will marry." "I didn't expect to receive a big one after half an hour

1, a female colleague fell out of love, she was drunk and sent a message: "Regardless of feelings, whoever gives half a million dowry will marry." "I didn't expect to receive large and small red envelopes after half an hour, but there was no total of 200 yuan, and several male colleagues sent messages to her: I have always treated you as a buddy, and you have such a thought, it is simply too much."

2, last night in overtime, I ordered a takeaway. More than two hours have not been delivered, I called the fierce: want to bad reviews are not? He was silent for a moment and said: Big brother, I am a student who just dropped out of school, but also a brother a day to work, six yuan delivery fee I found you for two hours, making money is too difficult, don't scold, I now want to go back to school to study well, your meal I eat now, complain about me to go! I......

3. After retirement, the old man took a lifetime of savings of 2 million yuan and opened a large hotel. Some time ago, the chef in the hotel hurt his eyes while cooking, because he was an old employee, and he was allowed to take a week off with pay! Yesterday was the seventh day, he called to say that his vision was blurred, and he applied for another three days of rest, and the old man also approved it. Today I was driving my husband out, and I met the cook, who was standing on the side of the road watching others play chess. The old man asked me to stop and honk the horn, and the cook was first stunned, then squinted his eyes and wiped the wall and left.

4. My brother was sick and hospitalized, and the attending doctor was his ex-girlfriend. This was embarrassing, the cousin was about to leave, but was stopped and said: "You are in line, now it is you, come in!" After the cousin went in, he said embarrassedly: "Doctor, look at it, it is cured, please eat!" The ex-girlfriend smiled and said, "One meal can be solved, it's cured, introduce me to a boyfriend!" The cousin was more embarrassed, the ex-boyfriend introduced, it sounded funny, but look at her serious expression, her eyes have been staring at the cousin, the cousin did not dare to laugh, nodded and agreed. Later, the cousin really sent a lot of colleague photos to her, and none of them replied, the cousin: "I want to fulfill my promise." " Sent a lot of photos she doesn't look at ah?

5. After the breakup, I drank at home all day and hardly went out. This morning, I was suddenly surprised by a rapid knock at the door. I yelled impatiently, "Whoa, there's something calling me." A voice came from outside the door: "I'm from the breakfast restaurant, bring you breakfast." Me: "I didn't call for breakfast." The man explained: "Your ex-boyfriend said that he promised to raise you for three years, and now that he has broken up, he still owes you two months, so let me deliver you food every day for the next two months." ”

6. This afternoon, the rich man took a small Internet celebrity he had just met to go shopping. The small Internet celebrity was suddenly anxious and went to the public toilet to facilitate it. Then, the rich man sat outside and waited, and the little Internet celebrity wanted to tease the rich man and sent him a message: "Honey, what should I do if my mobile phone falls out of the toilet?" The rich man coldly replied, "Is it true that SHI is sending me a message?" ”

7. When I was very young, I loved music, and my favorite thing was rock. Dream of having a drum kit of your own, having your own band, and being able to perform everywhere. Now my wish has finally come true, I have my own drum kit, my own band. Don't tell you more, the old Li in our village is dying, I want to go to his family to talk about business!

8. My cousin works in Futukang, lives with her boyfriend, and usually does not pay attention to the three fetuses. Now that she was pregnant again, the doctor told her that if she beat the child again, she would have no fertility. The cousin planned to give birth to the child, but did not dare to tell the father-in-law and the mother-in-law. She took a leave of absence to go home, wanting to make friends first with the tone of her parents. My cousin said, "Mom, I've been enjoying kids lately!" The aunt was secretly happy, glanced at her uncle, and said, "You just like it." The cousin was immediately overjoyed, felt that there was a drama, and planned to find a suitable time to tell the old couple. After a month, her aunt said to her: "Daughter, my mother is pregnant again, you like it, haha." ”

9, the girlfriend split her legs and found a tall and mighty man. I broke up with him heartbreakingly, but didn't delete V-letter friends. 10 days ago, my girlfriend posted a self-pai wearing a black and white striped T-shirt in the circle of friends. My comment: Now the prison treatment is good, and you can also be allowed to wear labor uniforms and send circles of friends. Today, I received a courier and opened it to see that it was my self-pai photo, black and white. There is also a sentence on the back of the photo: Heaven is worry-free, may you always be healthy!

10, overtime at night to change the contract, get up in the morning cold a little pain. When I was taking medicine, I was seen by my nephew, who came over and hugged me and asked: Aunt, are you taking medicine, are you sick? Don't be afraid. I was instantly moved: Well, but my aunt got better immediately after taking the medicine. The nephew jumped up happily: Really? Since my aunt is well, take me out to buy good food now.

11. My eldest sister-in-law is divorced and lives in my house temporarily. It happened that my wife was on a business trip, and I was at home with my eldest sister-in-law! One night, I was watching TV with my sister-in-law and two people. Nothing happened and I made small talk. I asked my sister-in-law how much money did she get divorced? She sighed and said. He did make a lot of money starting a company over the years. He bought the family's house and car. Although I divorced because he was looking for a woman. But I don't covet his money either. After the divorce, I only took two hundred million, and it can only be regarded as painless for him. I looked at my sister-in-law stunned, my mouth wide open and unable to speak.

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