1, the boss's Qianjin looks particularly beautiful, after graduating from Tongji, he came to work in the company. Later, Qianjin became pregnant, and the boss was very angry and asked: Whose child is it? Qianjin did not dare to say it directly

1, the boss's Qianjin looks particularly beautiful, after graduating from Tongji, he came to work in the company. Later, Qianjin became pregnant, and the boss was very angry and asked: Whose child is it? Qianjin did not dare to say it directly, so he replied: It is our company... The boss was furious, and the next morning more than 90 people in the company resigned, and I also prepared the resignation application with trepidation. The boss looked at me and said: Xiao Wu, you don't have to resign. I was so happy, I couldn't imagine that the boss trusted himself so much! As a result, the boss went on to say: You are the ugliest in the whole company, and my daughter will not look at you if she is blind! Qianjin cried and said, "Dad, I'm really blind!?

2. After a fight with my wife, I came to the room alone, took the door and lay on the bed with my eyes closed. At some point, my kindergarten son stood in front of the bed and asked in a sympathetic tone, "Very depressed, isn't it?" I opened my eyes to look at my son and sighed. My son tapped me on the shoulder and said, "Oh, that's how women are!" I've been putting up with her for a long time. ”

3. When I was in college, one of our roommates found a girlfriend, so he generously invited us to a big meal. After graduation, we have not been in contact, and we do not know what the situation is now. Yesterday my aunt introduced me to a blind date and asked me to meet today. When I arrived at the place where I had made an appointment, Cai found out that the woman was actually the girlfriend of the roommate. I was a little embarrassed and didn't know if I should talk about it. As a result, she actually said that what she liked before was actually me, who was a roommate's girlfriend in order to get close to me. I don't know if I should believe it, should this relative be in the end?

4. At night, my boyfriend sent me home, and suddenly lightning and thunder began, and my boyfriend asked me, "Are you afraid of thunder?" Me: "I'm afraid, how?" Boyfriend: "Then tell your mother that you are afraid of thunder, let me stay and sleep with you!" Me: "My mother must have returned to me, 'You've lived for thirty years, and today you are starting to be afraid of thunder, you are stupid!' "The boyfriend is speechless, and the mother-in-law is not easy to deal with...?

5. Working at Shun f Express, resulting in a married female manager becoming pregnant. The female manager fired me in order not to let this matter go out. I looked for a job for many days, and finally saw a favorite, which was to work as a driver for the big boss, with a monthly salary of more than 90,000 yuan. When I went to apply, I found out that the boss was a woman, in her forties. We didn't talk about anything, we talked a little bit about homework, and work experience. The boss brought me a bottle of nutrition express, and I shook my head and said I wouldn't drink it. Then the boss brought me another bottle of rock candy Sydney, and I still shook my head. Finally, the boss brought me a Chinese cigarette, and I didn't even think about it. Then the boss said no driver, let me leave, I was confused at the time, what is the situation?

6, the wife went out to carefully hit a car, helplessly can only call the insurance company. Wife: Husband, I just drove someone else's car, what can I do? Me: It's all right, didn't you buy insurance at me, what kind of car is across the street? Wife: The owner told me it was a Koenigsegg CCX R. I was silent for a while and said: Wife, now our family has only two choices. The first is that you pretend to be fully responsible for drunk driving, file for bankruptcy, and I will let the company prepare 600W of cash for you. The second article is to file for bankruptcy tomorrow, and our company will go bankrupt with you.

7. The manager sent a form to all of us in our department, asking us to fill in personal information, and declared that each person had one and could not be altered. A brother came up and filled it in, and it turned out that the ethnic "Han" was filled in the gender column. Because he said that he could not be altered, he was very anxious, and as a result, he made a clever move and added a "zi" word after the word "Han".

8. A few days ago, my sister-in-law just got her driver's license and borrowed my newly purchased Bentley. I had to take the subway to work, and suddenly Alipay rang out: 2 million yuan was in the account. Suddenly everyone on the bus was looking at me, and I was scared to take out my phone and open it. It turned out that my ex-girlfriend, who had just broken up, sent me a WeChat message: This money buys you a Porsche. I was touched: Why is it so good for me now? Do you want to get me back? Her: Huh? I was just playing Truth or Dare, and you'll remember to give me back the money later!!! I.....

9. Usually have a good relationship with female colleagues, I am sick and hospitalized, she ignored her husband's objections and took care of me in the hospital for three days and three nights. After being discharged from the hospital, I thanked her specially and invited her to dinner as a reward, she said: "Brother, I am sincere to you, I will not hide from you now, I have encountered some difficulties, I want to ask you to borrow some money." I said, "No problem, as long as you open your mouth!" The female colleague said, "30,000." "I agreed and transferred the money on the spot. Half a year later, she didn't pay it back, and after a year, she still didn't pay it back. Recently, I have been tight on hand, so I can't help but send WeChat to ask her when it will be convenient for her to return my money? She replied with three poems: Between the clouds of the White Emperor, the apes on both sides of the strait could not stop crying, and the light boat had passed through the Ten Thousand Heavy Mountains. "I don't understand what it means?" This is an ancient poem from junior high school, but it is missing something. I realized that this lady is not simple, and the layout is a little set. You say, am I being tricked?

10. The mother-in-law worked in the electronics factory and saved more than 1 million yuan, and then sent her brother-in-law to Hengshui School to study, so that he could be admitted to the 985 University. But the brother-in-law did not argue, fell off the list, the mother-in-law found a good relationship for him to re-read, the brother-in-law said that he was not willing to say anything. The family took turns to persuade him to no avail, and the mother-in-law let him go to a hotel to work, saying that he would wash the dishes for two months and know that it was hard, and he would beg to go to school. However, in less than a month, the brother-in-law actually got along with the only daughter of the hotel owner, and the two were still very affectionate. This proves that going to school is not the only way out!

11. When I first arrived at the office, the boss patted me on the shoulder and said to me in a serious voice, Ah Xiang, you are already an adult, so even if you are not happy in your heart, don't write your true thoughts on your face? Everyone is blind and can see it. I think his words are indeed very reasonable, so today I washed away the words "a group of mentally retarded" on my face.

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