1, the young and beautiful sister-in-law is pregnant, when going to the hospital for pregnancy testing, the doctor said that the fetus is small, pay attention! Finally, after staying up until the child was born, the sister-in-law quickly asked the nurse: "Baby."

1, the young and beautiful sister-in-law is pregnant, when going to the hospital for pregnancy testing, the doctor said that the fetus is small, pay attention! Finally, after staying up until the child was born, the sister-in-law quickly asked the nurse: "How heavy is the child?" The nurse replied, "3.8!" The sister-in-law was confused at that time: "How can it be so small as 3.8, but what can I do?" Tears fell as he spoke! When the nurse saw it, she quickly said, "What are you crying?" You can't cry after giving birth! The sister-in-law choked and asked, "Wouldn't it be bad for a child to be so young?" The nurse said: "Where is it small, 3.8 kilograms..."??

2. In order to fight for less than 30 years, I married a 55-year-old rich woman and became a door-to-door son-in-law. Because the rich woman's villa is far from my home, I rarely go home. Yesterday was my mother's birthday, and I called my mother to say hello. The mother asked: Son, do you wear a mask when you go out? I said: Why wear a mask in such a hot weather? Mom: You are a big man as a door-to-door son-in-law, do you still have the face to go out to meet people? I:......

3, I went to the market, a pig killer and a tea seller in the market bet. The pig killer said, "The hammer hammer and the egg hammer cannot be broken." The tea seller said, "The hammer is broken!" The pig killer said, "The hammer does not break!" "The tea seller was not convinced, took out an egg, and beat it hard with a hammer, and the egg broke. The tea seller said, "Isn't this broken?" The pig killer said, "The egg is broken, but what I am saying is that the hammer is not broken!" ”

4. The old man called the brother-in-law to tell the brother-in-law that he had picked up a snake in the field and asked whether it was stewed or stuffy. The brother-in-law told him to release him, and he hung up the phone when he knew. When the brother-in-law came home from work, the old man brought a bowl of soup, and the brother-in-law asked, "What is this?" The old man replied, "Soup, there are ginseng!" ”

5. At a party, colleagues complained about how humble they were at home. Curiously, I asked: Don't you have the time to be in charge? Colleagues asked: Do you have one? Me: Of course I have, my wife must ask for my opinion to buy clothes! Colleagues asked curiously: Why? Me: Because if she buys light-colored clothes, I won't be able to wash them!?

6. My sister and I are dragons and phoenixes, and we have been reading together since we were young. When the results of the college entrance examination were issued that year, my sister and I rushed to the Internet café to check the results. I scored 600 points, my sister scored 432 points, and the undergraduate line of that year scored 452 points! My sister cried at that time, crying and saying that she was willing to exchange 10 years of life for 20 points! I looked at the computer and said: Don't cry, 452 is the undergraduate line of liberal arts, what are you excited about a science subject? The younger sister listened to it like another village, and quickly checked the undergraduate line of science! Unexpectedly, it was actually 433 points!

7. I scored 623 points in the college entrance examination, which is the college entrance examination in the province. Later, he was sent to a key university, and the younger brother of the school started one day, after turning off the lights at night. Our boys' dorm collectively shouted, "Call! incoming call! It turned out that 10 minutes later, the call really came, and then we collectively shouted: "Turn off the lights later!" Lights out later! I didn't expect to really turn off the lights until eleven o'clock, and finally, we collectively shouted: "Woman! Woman! "Then our housekeeper aunt came in and let us run around the playground five times...

8. In the middle of the night yesterday, a female thief came to my house to steal, and I caught her squarely. I was going to hit 110, and she asked me without hurrying, "Did you lose anything?" I replied, "No." She immediately showed a fierce light, "You hurry up, you didn't lose, but I lost." My 7-figure diamond was dropped, just so that the police could help me see it. "My brain cramped and I immediately threw her out of my house. Poor me, I searched at home for three days and three nights, but I didn't even see a shadow. Thinking back to the strange smile on the corner of her mouth, I finally knew that I was deeply tricked by her!

9, my wife is the female anchor of Douyu, and I spent a full three million to agree to marry me! After marriage, I found out that she was a shopaholic. Yesterday I saw the news of the sudden death of a young courier on my mobile phone. I said to my wife: There was a 23-year-old courier who sent about 400 couriers in the heat of 43 degrees, and died suddenly! The wife said regretfully: Oh, it is so pitiful to die at such a young age! I said to her who was shopping online: Without buying and selling, there is no killing!?

10. In the morning, I went to the breakfast restaurant at the entrance of the community to eat buns, and a family of three sitting next to me was also eating buns!? Suddenly the little boy asked his mother, "What does it mean to travel to get married?" His mother said: "It is that when men and women get married, they do not do business in hotels, but go on vacation together." The boy asked, "Did you and your father take me there?" Mom smiled and replied, "Take it, you follow your father when you go, and you follow your mother when you come back." ”

11, I do micro-business to sell slimming products, only one year to earn 1 million. Today I went to the Maserati 4S store to buy the president, and the sales manager warmly welcomed me. I took out my cigarette and put it in my mouth and just lit it, sales manager: Beauty, we don't let you smoke here. I got up and took two steps outside: Here? Sales Manager: Not either. I took a few more steps and asked: Is this okay? The sales manager shook his head: Still not. I continued to take two more steps outside and asked: Is it okay here too? The sales manager got angry: You're still asking me when you're done smoking?

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #