1, the eldest sister-in-law is very beautiful. Divorced today. Move to my house. After dinner in the evening, the eldest sister-in-law wants to take a bath. My wife was afraid that I would peek at my sister-in-law taking a bath and told me to go out and hang out. I'm angry

1, the eldest sister-in-law is very beautiful. Divorced today. Move to my house. After dinner in the evening, the eldest sister-in-law wants to take a bath. My wife was afraid that I would peek at my sister-in-law taking a bath and told me to go out and hang out. I said indignantly, Am I that kind of person? Then I went out the door breathlessly. Just after arriving at the door of the community, a strange young woman pulled me aside. The young woman said that she had come here for a tour, and that her mobile phone and wallet had been stolen. Tell me to do well and lend her 50 bucks. She was hungry and wanted to have dinner. I was surprised and said, does it cost 50 yuan for dinner? I'll give you ten bucks, there's a bun shop over there, two bucks for a meat bun, and you can buy five. The young woman nodded and said, ten dollars is fine. ???

2. Meet with the blind date girl in a Western restaurant today, she looks very beautiful. When ordering, she said gracefully, "I only drink Rafi!" "It seems that the next two months will eat soil, and I ordered a bottle with a hard scalp." Beauty smacked a mouthful, "That's the taste!" "When you check out, you count the steaks, and it's only 500 yuan in total. I whispered to the cashier, "Why is it so cheap?" The little sister said: "We don't have Rafite here, it's all ordinary dry red!" ”?

3. Stole my mother's bank card and bought a halterneck fan on Taobao. When I first started to use it, it was very good, the wind blew on the face was particularly cool, and the fan on the left side of the face did not turn for ten minutes. I immediately asked the merchant: "There is a problem with the quality of your fan, you are selling waste?" 20+ pieces for 10 minutes? Is this appropriate? Money! Or bad reviews! Customer service is very polite: "Pro, can you take a video to see?" If there is a problem with the quality, you can return it. "I looked for a bright spot here to shoot, and then I found that the little fan wheel was full of my broken hair. I said how to blow the wind while the scalp is tingling, the feeling is that the wind is flashing hair.

4. The father-in-law made more than 8 million yuan selling mineral water in India, and he took the whole family to travel. My father-in-law deliberately stayed in the Burj Al Arab Hotel, hoping to experience the fun of a rich man as soon as possible. After checking in, the waiter took him to a room. After closing the door, the father-in-law shouted: Do you think I am stupid? The most expensive single room here is as big as a cupboard, and there is nothing in it except a chair? The waiter said: Sir please come in, this is the elevator!

5, the last time I bought the big lottery, I won 87000000, but I went to work every day in order to enrich myself, the female boss scolded me in the past, I did not return my mouth, but today when she scolded me, I was angry at once, saying: "You are saying one more word, I will buy your company!" "I didn't expect to be unable to stop the boss, and I was scolded five times, but I was angry and signed a contract with her to buy the company." It turned out that the company was severely shrinking. The landlady said triumphantly: "Actually, I already knew that you won the jackpot!" Carelessly lost Jingzhou, this is a pit, and when she was frustrated, she smiled and said: "Fool, don't worry, I am your girlfriend, isn't this money back in your hands?" "The landlady is thirty years older than me, and you say, can you agree to this?"

6, the sister-in-law and her boyfriend have been together for five years, and the relationship has been very good. But recently, it was found that the boyfriend's mobile phone had the mobile phone number of the "girlfriend", not hers. She didn't want to break up, so she called back that phone behind her boyfriend's back, hoping to save the relationship. After the phone was connected, there was a magnetic uncle's voice. So she cried, feeling that she had been deceived even more. What she didn't know was that there was another type of person in the world, and their surname was female...

7. At night, my wife was woken up by a cry. When I sat up, I saw the husband next to me crying inexplicably, and hurriedly woke up my husband and asked what? After the husband woke up, he was silent for a while and said: Dreaming that he is married again. The wife listened, smiled and said: Isn't that very good? Haven't you long wanted to find another one, crying, should you be happy? The husband looked at his wife and said: As soon as the cave house was uncovered, it was actually you!

8, watching idol dramas with my girlfriend, I let my girlfriend help me charge 100 yuan of phone bills, my girlfriend's mind is all on the small fresh flesh, the charge fee accidentally lost a number, the result was that I rushed 100 yuan to others. I thought I wouldn't come back anyway, so I sent a text message: "Don't thank me, rich and willful!" "After a while, my mobile phone text message actually prompted a successful recharge of 1,000 yuan." Then, a text message was added: "No thanks, I'm poor, but only money is left!"

9. When I got home, I heard my brother and sister-in-law arguing and arguing, and the quarrel was very fierce. The sister-in-law said, "Break up! My brother: "Break up and break up, go tomorrow!" The next morning, they still didn't agree to reconcile, and then went out together. Then the niece was very anxious for them, so she chased them out, and after a while she cried and came back. I asked, "Baby, what's going on?" What are you crying about? The niece said: "They broke up and forgot to bring their marriage certificate and household registration book, I sent them over, and I was beaten up before I was ready!"

10, I have a cousin, she is very good, is very good at life. Selling vegetables in the vegetable market, a bunch of green vegetables, the leaves are yellow and reluctant to throw away, and no one wants three dollars. The cousin came back from work, stripped off all the yellow leaves, and snatched up five pieces and a pound. Cousin education cousin: This dish is like a woman who needs to lose weight and dress up, weight loss and dress up is worth it, if you were willing to spend money to make a fuss, why can you be cheap enough to marry me? How much is the bride price worth? The cousin thought it was a loss, spent more than five thousand to buy cosmetics, and the cousin regretted it...?

11, met a beautiful woman on the Internet, at first I thought her photo was a network map, but then added a V letter. I clicked into her circle of friends to see, all of them are beautiful and shiny self-pai pictures. I didn't expect the beautiful woman to look so beautiful, and I fell into it all at once. I chuckled and said, "What do you think I'm like to be your boyfriend?" Beauty said: You are like a joke! I immediately became serious: I was serious. Beauty: I said that the self-pai photos in your circle of friends are like a joke!

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #