The eldest sister-in-law is beautiful. Divorced today. Move to my house. After dinner in the evening, the eldest sister-in-law wants to take a bath. My wife was afraid that I would peek at my sister-in-law taking a bath and told me to go out and hang out. I'm indignant

The eldest sister-in-law is beautiful. Divorced today. Move to my house. After dinner in the evening, the eldest sister-in-law wants to take a bath. My wife was afraid that I would peek at my sister-in-law taking a bath and told me to go out and hang out. I said indignantly, Am I that kind of person? Then I went out the door breathlessly. Just after arriving at the door of the community, a strange young woman pulled me aside. The young woman said that she had come here for a tour, and that her mobile phone and wallet had been stolen. Tell me to do well and lend her 50 bucks. She was hungry and wanted to have dinner. I was surprised and said, does it cost 50 yuan for dinner? I'll give you ten bucks, there's a bun shop over there, two bucks for a meat bun, and you can buy five. The young woman nodded and said, ten dollars is also OK.?

2. A few days ago, when the freshman year started, I entered the university that all Qianqian students dream of. Standing on the podium excitedly, he said: Hello everyone, I know that some of you can only get here by relying on your relationships, some of you rely on your parents, and I have come here step by step by my own hands... Before I could finish speaking, there was a warm applause from the audience, and the teacher next to me asked me: What is your name, classmate? Just as I was about to answer, a group of security guards rushed in and shouted at me: This is the boy! Climb over the wall and come in, give me a catch on him!

3. Fa Xiao works at a listed company and talks about a girlfriend in Guangxi. When he went to her house to propose to her, the old man opened his mouth and asked for a dowry of 300,000 yuan. Fa Xiao listened to such a big number, and did not say anything to get up and leave. The old man stopped him and said, "Are you a man, you don't dare to struggle?" No counter-offer? Fa Xiao glanced at his 180-pound girlfriend and said: Forget it, I don't deserve her...

4. Working at SoftBank, yesterday our PR manager had a party that I went to. That day I dressed up and went in a yellow slim suit. When I came to the party, I found myself stared at by a little boy. I walked over to him and asked him: Little friend, why do you always stare at your uncle, is your uncle too handsome? The child innocently said: Uncle, hello Huang Oh.

5. Hanging out on the street with my girlfriend at night, feeling a little thirsty, and walking to the side of the road to sell ice cream. I asked the boss how much was a piece, and the boss said three dollars a piece. The girlfriend asked hurriedly next to her: Ten yuan three sells or not? The boss looked at my girlfriend and said to me: Boy, don't let your partner manage the money when you get married in the future! I glanced at my girlfriend, not caring that she had spent all her monthly salary and returned it to me.

There was a rich second generation who was not sincere, and the female guest asked, "What do you do?" The second generation replied: "Driving." Suddenly, all the lights went out, and only one lamp remained. The second generation felt that the remaining one must be true love, and said, "Actually, I opened a Rolls Royce for my father." Later, they successfully held hands successfully, and before leaving, the female guest threw a wink at the host, and the host looked sorry. Finally, after the props team checked, it was found that the lamp of the original female guest was broken.

2. In the Meituan delivery for 3 years to make more than 800,000 yuan, with this money to buy a house in the old community. The construction of the community is relatively poor, there is no garage, and the car is usually placed on the side of the road. It snowed last night, and early in the morning my daughter-in-law got up to clean the snow on the body of the car, and then wiped it again and again. I asked my daughter-in-law: There is a little snow, no need to wipe it, and I have never seen you like this! The daughter-in-law said: You know what, today I am going to attend the old classmates party, and I can't let people look down on me. Curiously, I asked: What does this have to do with wiping the car? Daughter-in-law: There will be no snow in the car in the garage.

3. The father-in-law is a wine gem, and every time he drinks too much, he will do something to his mother-in-law. The mother-in-law really couldn't stand it, so she spent all her savings to buy a purebred Tibetan mastiff, and when the father-in-law moved again, she was directly bitten by the Tibetan mastiff and became half-dead. The mother-in-law remarried to a foreign country, and the husband saw that the father-in-law was living alone, so he bought a wheelchair from the Internet and took him to our home. Once, the father-in-law was walking downstairs in the community in a wheelchair and met Uncle Zhang and his wife on crutches. The father-in-law said solemnly: Oh, both use helpers, both of them add up to 6 and a half legs! Uncle Zhang's wife listened, a little displeased, and said: You shake a broken wheelchair in front of your eyes every day, don't you die? They are all almost 80 years old, and they are not demented at all!

4. Yesterday, when I was idle and idle, I was suddenly photographed by a person. As soon as I looked back, I saw a little handsome guy, and the little handsome guy also looked at me and asked, "Sister, where is the nearest bus stop sign?" I stopped and thought about it seriously, then turned around and smiled and pointed out a direction to the handsome guy! The handsome man suddenly froze when he saw it, did not know how to be happy, and then suddenly ran away, and did not forget to shout: "Thank you, aunt!" ”

In the middle of the night, I couldn't sleep thinking about my daughter-in-law's affection, and as a result, my daughter-in-law woke up without saying a word about the small fist wheel like a windmill, giving me a smash, while beating and scolding: The old woman bought a lot of food, wore, and was about to pay the bill, and TM was woken up by you, you usually always prevented me, even if the old woman had a dream, you TM came to make trouble.

2. After graduating from college, I went to work at Foxconn, and after my efforts, I finally got the recognition of the leader, and the annual salary was as high as 500,000! On this day, I sent the preparation materials to the vice president, who asked me to sit down and said that I had a work task. The deputy general manager said with a heavy heart: You will preside over the meeting on Monday, and you must severely criticize and trace these indicators that have not been achieved, and I want to hear how they explain it? People in my position, this kind of unpleasant words really have no face to say...

3. It was almost 12 o'clock when I came home from overtime at work at night, and my wife gave me hot food while taking the child. Looking at her busy back, I secretly swore in my heart that I could not treat her badly in this life! She looked at me tenderly and said, "Come, wrap it up!" I walked over, gently breaded her from behind, and whispered in her ear, "Wife is hard!" The wife's heel chopped the surface of my foot: "Let you wrap the child!" Don't you think I'm tired of serving my kids all day long? ”