1. On the day of Tanabata, the husband returned early from a business trip, just arrived at the door, heard the voice of a man in the bedroom, was very angry, and rushed into the bedroom in a panic. I saw my wife alone with a big head

1. On the day of Tanabata, the husband returned early from a business trip, just arrived at the door, heard the voice of a man in the bedroom, was very angry, and rushed into the bedroom in a panic. Seeing his wife sitting on the bed alone in sweat, the husband asked angrily: What about people! The wife replied breathlessly: Say... Say what, how can there be other people in this room. The husband's bedroom, living room, kitchen, under the bed, wardrobe are all looked for again, and sure enough, a figure was found on the bed table, the husband kicked down, and the wife came in later and said, "Hey, where did the master who repaired the air conditioner go?"

2. The female boss gave the mobile phone to Xiao Qiang, let Xiao Qiang buy her a ticket, Xiao Qiang took the mobile phone and entered the password skillfully, and then very skilledly bought the ticket. After finishing the incident, he suddenly realized how the landlady's password was the same as his birthday, and he asked curiously: "We are on the same day of birthday!" The landlady said, "Fool, that's your birthday!" Xiao Qiang's heart is beautiful, and the birthday of 911 is easy to remember. Seeing that he didn't show anything, the landlady was anxious: "You're not going to say something?" Xiao Qiang wanted to be hungry for a moment, and said: "Don't tell others about my birthday..." The female boss gritted her teeth with hatred in her heart and silently read it a hundred times, fool. In fact, Xiao Qiang is not stupid, who let the female boss 300 pounds.

3. The male doctor in the hospital likes a nurse in the department, and today they are on duty together to make up a story to make friends With the attitude of the nurse and the male doctor: Yesterday I dreamed of you. The nurse said: What happened to me? The male doctor said: I dreamed that I proposed to you in the office. The nurse said: Then did I say yes? The male doctor said: You were just about to answer me, and then an intern came in, and I woke up. So, can you say now, would you like to? The nurse blushed and twisted, just about to open her mouth, when an intern pushed the door in: Teacher!?

4. After my phD, I never found a girlfriend. Last night I was invited to Quanjude for a drink, and I asked him what kind of girlfriend he wanted to find. He said to me: Now that I am getting older, I have repeatedly lowered my mate selection standards, and now I only ask for two points, women, and live. Me: Isn't that simple? Dude: But I thought about it carefully, and I thought it was still inappropriate, and I guess I had to cancel one.

5. Wait! The female president stopped me and said: "Yueyue's father died three years ago, and you are a man in the family..." I refused even more, and she still wanted to put all the burden of the family on me.

6. Dad bought a Rolls-Royce, my parents have a driver's license, and they urged me to take the test. Before I was preparing to take the driver's license, in order to practice my skills, I drove the tractor around the village every day. As a result, the exam was done, and without turning, I shook down the glass and looked at the front wheel. The coach asked me, "What?" I said, "This car is not as advanced as a tractor, and I can't see how the front wheels turn!" ”

7. My buddies and I like to play with chicken and often double rows in Internet cafes. Every time it was late, so we both got hooked up in it. I remember once, my buddies and I bought train tickets to go back to our hometown, and the train was about to start, but we still hadn't found the platform. The buddy said urgently, "Strange, how come there is not even a coordinate here!" "I was about to laugh like crazy after listening to it, it was completely addicted!

8. Deposited 5 million yuan in china construction bank, and china construction bank loaned the 5 million yuan to Xiao Li. Xiao Li used the 5 million yuan from the loan to buy a house, and the real estate developer deposited the 5 million into the bank. So the problem is, there is only 5 million in total, and I and the real estate developer can take 5 million each, a total of 10 million. The bank can only collect a loan of 5 million yuan from Xiao Li, is the bank losing 5 million yuan? Where did the other 5 million go?

9. The sister-in-law is pregnant, and the man's family has been dragging on not getting married until the wedding is about to give birth! At the wedding, the sister-in-law had a big belly. I asked my sister-in-law's husband privately: "The sister-in-law looks like she is about to give birth, how can I delay getting married at this time, how inconvenient is it?" Her husband smiled: "You don't understand, what kind of personality she has, don't you know, at this time get married, in a few days she will be born, honeymoon will let her confinement, I don't have to accompany her around, how good." "I was stunned...??

10. The sister-in-law works in the Cayenne 4S shop and earns more than one million a year. With this money, he resigned and opened a small supermarket next to the Bentley 4S store. One night, a rich second generation driving a Cayenne came to the store to buy a bottle of black tea. FuErdai opened the black tea and took a sip, only to see that the lid said another bottle. So he threw the bottle cap to the sister-in-law and said: "Boss, I won the lottery, the bottle cap is given to you, I don't have to give money for this bottle!" "And then drove his Cayenne away...?" My sister-in-law thought about it all night and didn't understand what was wrong.

11 I went to a class reunion and many of my classmates were drunk. Before leaving, everyone sent the drunk home separately. There was still one female student left, so I had to drive to drop her off. Because he was afraid that his girlfriend would misunderstand, he did not tell her about it. Early the next morning, I drove my girlfriend to work and suddenly noticed a woman's shoe at her feet. So I took advantage of my girlfriend's look out the window and quickly picked up the shoe and threw it out the window, which was a relief. When she got to her girlfriend's company, she yelled, "Huh? What about my other shoe? ”"

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