The company arranged for me and my female colleagues to travel on business, and on the way, her husband kept calling me, and I didn't answer once. When I got to the hotel, he called me again, and I had no choice but to connect. He said

The company arranged for me and my female colleagues to travel on business, and on the way, her husband kept calling me, and I didn't answer once. When I got to the hotel, he called me again, and I had no choice but to connect. He said, "Brother, I know you're on a business trip with my daughter-in-law, and I tell you that my daughter-in-law sleeps and snores and grinds her teeth. I said, "Brother, don't worry, it's all right!" Her husband said, "You, I am at ease, I am not at ease with my daughter-in-law." The next day, I called my eldest brother back and said, "Brother, my sister-in-law doesn't grind her teeth or talk about dreams. "One sentence annoyed him, saying that he would go back and beat me." I wondered, isn't the communication very good, how can you suddenly hit someone, do you say he is sick?

2. When she was in love with her wife, she was very ladylike, spoke nicely and gently, and dressed like a little XIAN girl every day. But after getting married, the whole woman was facing the sky every day, dressed like a big mother. And I don't pay attention to hygiene, I don't like to take a bath, and I grab snacks with my son all day long. Needless to say, I have to stop the two of them from grabbing snacks to eat!

3. After arriving at the Foxconn workshop, I found a female colleague laughing at the mobile phone. I felt particularly strange and asked my female colleague what was going on. She replied: I am idle today, to the male netizens, men I know, male classmates, each sent 5.21 yuan of red packets, as of 11 o'clock, I received red packets, the least 5.21, there are 52.1 yuan, 101, 200, 521, adding up to more than 4,000 yuan! My face adored: Oh, you're going to make a fortune from this!

4. I recently met a female webmaster when I was surfing the Internet in an Internet café, and I liked her, and last night I plucked up the courage to confess to her. Me: "I like you, let's be together!" She said to me very gently, "Then can you wait for me to graduate from college?" I felt that I still had hope, so I couldn't wait to ask, "When will you graduate?" Unexpectedly, she cried when she heard my words, and she said, "Whoops, I have to repeat my studies for another year, because I haven't been admitted to college yet!" ”

5. Yesterday I brought up a new Buick Yinglang, which is convenient for myself to find a daughter-in-law and invite a few colleagues to dinner in the evening. Several people talked about their lives after marriage, and one said: "Her husband will do anything for her before marriage, but after marriage, he wants her to constantly urge her to take out the garbage." A male colleague was very proud of the words: "Say he will at least open the door for his wife." His wife said, "Yeah, it's convenient for me to take out the garbage!" ”

6. It has been raining for seven consecutive days, and today I helped to see the store, when a beautiful woman in a short dress quickly ran to the bottom of the tin canopy in front of the store to avoid the rain. I watched the beauty stand for almost 10 minutes, it should be quite tired, so I enthusiastically took a stool out for the beauty to sit. Unexpectedly, the beauty glared at me fiercely. Then he scolded me: You turtle, don't think about good things! Then I ran out in the pouring rain!

7. Today Conan went to the park with his wife and the company secretary on his back to fly kites. The wife looked at Conan's phone, and Conan cried and explained, "Her phone is out of battery, let me take a picture of her." Then the wife carefully looked at the photo, not without irony: "Yo, it seems that you took a very hard picture of her, so good-looking!" Conan was almost scared to death, busy explaining: "Just shoot it." The wife directly whipped her leg and said, "So you mean that she looks good at any shot?" ”

8. The abbot drives the new car he just picked up. As a result, a BMW 5 Series was rear-ended on the road, and the abbot was in a hurry. The abbot got out of the car and asked angrily: How did you drive the car? A beautiful woman came down on the horse: What are you shouting? Isn't it just a broken Volkswagen? The abbot thought about it, could this beautiful woman not even distinguish between Maybach and the public? The abbot blindly bluffed her: I heard that Volkswagen has a twelve-cylinder engine? The beauty was terrified and said weakly: Are you Huiteng? Abbot: No, I'm Maybach!

  #Funny# #搞笑段子 #