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When it comes to marriage, everyone has their own beliefs.
In the hit drama "Our Marriage", Jiang Jing suffered betrayal from her husband.
Some people feel that she is not worthy, and some people feel that this is expected.
After all, as a stay-at-home mother, losing the ability to be financially independent also loses the right to speak.
So, when her husband was out on a business trip and betrayed her, she also didn't have the ability to resist the other party.
Divorce is the only option.
I have to say, this is tragic. It could have been avoided, but it buried happiness with my own hands.
There is a saying in "The Age of Two Cores": "Marriage without love is an immoral marriage, and marriage with only love is an unrealistic marriage." ”
I deeply believe that as an adult, if you encounter an unhappy marriage, you must not put the responsibility on one party.
After all, marriage is a matter for two people, and if you don't know how to run it, you will only come to an end.
Therefore, there are many reasons why men change their minds, and as a woman, these three major traps must be known.
1, figure anything, don't just picture men being good to you
Love begins with the heartbeat and ends with indifference.
Don't think of marriage as easy, you feel that a man is good for you, but, in the end, you will only lose badly.
There's a saying that goes, "Sometimes I don't know if I like to be nice to you or if I'm used to being nice to you." ”
It is true that likes and habits, if they cannot be distinguished, then marriage is just an empty shell.
In the first issue of the variety show "Spring Day Late departure", 7 divorced singles told their stories.
Among them, there are 4 women.
Lu Ying's story impressed me deeply.
She said that when she and her husband met each other, they were very in love, and she was absolutely very good to each other.
However, after six months of marriage, the physical examination found that he had nephritis and may not be able to have children. After the operation, the husband hid himself and told his father that he wanted to divorce Lu Ying.
At first, Lu Ying didn't know. Later, she offered to go out and have noodles with her husband, and while waiting, the other party filed for divorce.
At that time, she never expected that the man who had taken care of herself in every way would file for divorce at her most difficult time.
I have to say that this hurt Lu Ying a lot, and it also made her feel that it was a joke to treat this matter of being good to herself as a promise of the Sea Oath Mountain Alliance.
In real life, I think there are a lot of people who are overbearing to men and have no ability to resist.
In fact, this is an illusion before you have attained the right results.
After all, men are sometimes more realistic than women.
So, women figure out that men are good to you, but don't just try to make each other good.
2, women who are not financially independent can not keep the hearts of men
There is a saying: "Economic independence can be independent personality, and economic independence has no right to speak." ”
I deeply agree with this, and women who are not financially independent do not even have the courage to say break up.
Just like Jiang Jing in "Our Marriage".
She and Shen Huixing took the baby in the park, Shen Huixing complained that her husband did not let her go out to work, but Jiang Jing advised her to accept the reality and make her husband the boss, so that the family could be harmonious.
However, can this view of marriage really be happy?
not necessarily. After all, not everyone just happens to meet a lover who is absolutely loyal to you.
And Jiang Jing is the unfortunate one.
In her husband's suitcase, she found evidence of betrayal of her, and at first she turned a blind eye.
Later, she raided her husband and arrested him, and the two completely broke out into a conflict.
In contrast, the husband also installed a video at home to observe Jiang Jing's daily life, and finally beat a rake.
Based on this, Jiang Jing had to be discouraged, chose to divorce, and got nothing.
This ending is very sad, but in fact, what is not the true portrayal of most women?
Women who have lost their earning power have no choice.
If you can, whether before or after marriage, I hope that you can maintain financial independence, so that you can withdraw from it.
3, get married too early, don't have children
Plato once said: "Children are afraid of darkness, and there are excuses; the real tragedy of life is that adults are afraid of light." ”
Admittedly, children are a bridge between a wife and a husband.
In marriage, there can be no love, but there can be no care and attention to loving oneself.
Recently, a reader left me a message in the background.
He is 45 years old, his wife is 43, married for 18 years and has a 15-year-old daughter.
Because he usually neglects to care about his wife, the other party chooses to betray the family in disappointment, and last month she and the reader filed for divorce, on the grounds that she felt that she was too painful and depressed in this family.
The two feared that their daughter would take the exam in June, so they pushed the divorce back.
To this reader, all I can say is to respect each other's choices.
After all, the marriage has already had a rift, and the other party has done something unfaithful to the family.
Even if you keep it now, you can maintain the marriage, but what about later?
Problems will still go wrong.
It can be seen that both men and women in marriage are concerned about their children, so when there is a conflict, they also try to minimize this harm to the children.
So, as a woman, if you get married too early, it is recommended to spend two years together and have children.
Because, when the relationship is unstable, if you have a child, there will be a contradiction in the back, and the child will be hurt.
Marriage, there are many people and things involved, think twice, is the world sober.
Xiaoyuan's message: Men's change of heart is sometimes not the fault of women, but caused by a variety of factors.
Therefore, when we evaluate a thing, we must not evaluate it with our own subjective views, which is really irrational.
Women, do not take their own efforts as a habit, first be good to themselves, and then be good to others, is the right solution.
For the rest of your life, love yourself well and be a woman with love in your heart.
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Topic: What do you think are the factors that make men change their minds?
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