The full text of the | totals 2030 words, and the reading time is about 3 minutes
After every woman gets married and has children, her identity and psychology will change, and even the trajectory of her life will change dramatically. No matter how good you are before marriage or before you have a baby, once you become a mother, the focus of life will shift, and the most appropriate identity in the eyes of the people around you is a mother, and the most important thing to do is to take care of the family and take care of the children.
Many women have to quit the workplace and return to the family to become full-time mothers after having children, which is out of maternal instinct, but also out of family responsibility and attitude towards life. But people around them mistakenly believe that there is no pressure to not go to work and take the baby at home, and even because there is no income, they are despised by their husbands.
At the beginning of the new year in 2022, when everyone was preparing new year goods and planning a new year reunion, Ms. Li, a full-time mother in Xi'an, reported domestic violence in real name. The mother posted a video and said that she had been abused by her husband many times, and she had no financial resources and could only be controlled by her husband. After the quarrel, the husband did not even pay living expenses, and asked Ms. Li to bear half of the family's expenses.
Ms. Li, who has been a full-time mother for 6 years, is completely out of touch with society, it is difficult to find a suitable job as soon as possible, so she can't take out money to do living expenses, and in desperation, her husband gives 500 yuan for living expenses, she has to write an IOU, Ms. Li said that from the original husband's "I raise you" to the current "I borrow you". Looking at this, my tears fell down, which is the real experience after being trampled on as a stay-at-home mother.
Although this is an isolated case, it has to be said that stay-at-home mothers are extremely risky professions, and no matter how much they pay, they are not recognized, and they are looked down upon by their husbands. In addition to maintaining lovers and families with feelings, there is no other guarantee, there is always a hidden danger of "losing everything", and the heartache and hardship of full-time mothers cannot be understood.
Stay-at-home moms are also helpless
The "Family Status White Paper" in 2019 has data showing that the proportion of full-time mothers after 95 is very high, and the proportion of families with babies is more than 55%.
What young woman is not willing to do what she likes, does not want to have a job and income, wants to buy what she decides, but they sacrifice themselves for the sake of the family and the children.
Most people think that women at home with a baby to do housework is a natural division of labor, in reality many mothers are indeed the main force with babies. For the sake of the family and the children, they give up their good jobs, endure the pain of leaving the workplace that can bring them a good income, and eventually everything revolves around the family's children, and their living expenses depend on their husbands.
Some mothers are not willing to take the baby at home to do housework, but eventually they will be opposed by their husbands, because the children need to be raised and the family needs to be taken care of, so that men can work without worries, while the husband does not consider the situation of full-time mothers.
As a mother, you will face this problem, a full-time, year-round job, no salary, no freedom, and everything is based on the needs of children and family needs.
Seeing the news that a full-time mother in Guangdong paid for 3 years for the family and children, and finally for various reasons the couple went to the point of divorce, the mother was compensated 10,000 yuan. Many netizens said that they were uneven, and the income of finding a job in 3 years was more than 10,000 yuan, even if the income from picking up waste in the community was much higher than 10,000 yuan.
The most poignant thing is that this stay-at-home mother had a restaurant before marriage and had a good income, and gave up her original good career because she got married, got pregnant and had children. Unexpectedly, 3 years of hard work were finally exchanged for a "reward" of 10,000 yuan.
In 2021, the civil code of the mainland mentions provisions on compensation for domestic labor services, in which one of the spouses has the right to claim compensation in order to assist the other party in his work, take care of children and the elderly at home, and have the right to claim compensation in the event of divorce. But the final amount of compensation will be determined based on the time and intensity of the domestic labor and the income of the other party, and what the stay-at-home mother pays is not measurable by money, and the compensation of money is not equal to the payment.
Stay-at-home moms are out of touch with society
In addition to being on standby every day to take care of the baby, full-time mothers also have endless housework, unfinished clothes, and no time of their own. When the baby is young, it is inconvenient to take out a lot of things, and she can only move around the family, let alone participate in social interaction. The older ones have to tutor and study, and they don't have much time to contact the outside world, and almost the same thing is repeated every day.
Surrounded by trivialities, they feel worthless for a long time, in addition to the children are home, many full-time mothers have become no longer pay attention to the image, and life is aimless. Being a stay-at-home mom leaves the workplace, away from socializing and basically disconnected from society.
There is no economic freedom, not understood
There is no income without work, and raising children is also a big expense, even if the husband gives living expenses, it must be calculated from time to time, putting the children's expenses and the living expenses of the whole family first, and there is no personal economic freedom at all.
No one is willing to reach out to others for money, fortunate to meet a considerate husband will understand the wife's difficulties, full-time mothers feel hard and not easy to be seen, psychological comfort.
In reality, many husbands do not understand the efforts of full-time mothers, thinking that it is a simple thing to see the baby doing housework at home, which is much easier than working outside, so that full-time mothers become lost and feel depressed and not respected.
Stay-at-home moms deserve to be respected
There have been proposals to give men "parental leave", to help full-time mothers share the pressure of taking care of children and take care of the family, and some people have proposed to pay full-time mothers, all of which show that full-time mothers deserve to be cared for, worthy of recognition and respect.
South Korea has a precedent five years ago, rewarding families with children, from the initial monthly reward of 1800 yuan to about 2900 yuan later, which is the progress of people's ideology, and the efforts of full-time mothers are recognized and seen.
Women's Day is coming, a holiday that highlights the equality of men and women, celebrates the contributions of women in all aspects of the economy, family and other aspects, and every woman deserves to be recognized and respected. And stay-at-home mothers are more worthy of being cared for, because only when they are loved and respected, they feel valuable, and all the heartache and dedication are worth it.
In the early hours of the morning, mom came to nag:
Meticulous care, strong love is indispensable for the healthy growth of children, and the normal operation of family life requires economic support. In order to provide a better quality of life and environment for the family, the payment of full-time mothers is equally important for the growth of their children and the happiness of the family. Being willing to sacrifice oneself in exchange for the healthy growth of children, in exchange for family stability, recognition and respect is the greatest comfort for full-time mothers. Happy Goddess Day to every woman!
(The picture source of this article is the network, if there is infringement, please contact to delete)