1. In the morning, I went to the vegetable market to buy vegetables, weighed a pound of river shrimp, and the boss skillfully filled the bag and threw it on the electronic scale. I shouted: Slow! He said and pulled out a 500ml bottle of mineral water. Didn't think about it

1. In the morning, I went to the market to buy vegetables, weighed a pound of river shrimp, and the boss skillfully filled the bag and threw it on the electronic scale. I shouted: Slow! He said and pulled out a 500ml bottle of mineral water. Unexpectedly, the stall owner also reacted to God, and immediately picked up the bag and said: Just remembered, this scale was just broken yesterday, come and I will take you to the opposite side to weigh it. And then I walked away without looking back!。。。。。 A year later, it was found before it was gone. It turned out that the wife used all the money in it to buy bags and cosmetics....

2. When I was in college, there was a classmate with a special female man in the class, who usually treated us like a brother-in-law. After work today, we both went to drink bubble tea together, and the girl dressed as a lady and listened to me very gently while drinking milk tea. During this time, I forgot what I said, and she wanted to "hum" like a little girl. Did you know that a hum hummed out of the nose with a small black pearl mixed with snot? At that time, I was embarrassed, and I could only hold back if I wanted to laugh.

3. After graduating from a college in Shanghai, I installed air conditioning in Gree. When I came home from work last night, my daughter-in-law said to me with some concern: "Husband, I am really afraid that your leaders will send you to work on the roof of a high-rise building. Me: "Don't worry! He will not send me to anyone. The daughter-in-law asked curiously, "Why?" Me: "Because I borrowed 8,000 yuan from the leader, would he dare to let me do dangerous work?" The daughter-in-law's eyes immediately lit up: "Money, hurry up and give it to me." ”

4. Tonight, I drank a lot of wine and plucked up the courage to confess to the girl I liked. At that time, I wrote a long love story and finally asked: Would you like to be my girlfriend? After a while, the other side replied: I am her mother, I already saw that you liked my daughter. I was embarrassed for a while, but I didn't know where the courage came from and sent another sentence in the past: So Auntie, would you like to be my mother-in-law? Three words quickly came over there: I do.

5. Our company recently came to a very good female colleague. Once, when the company was at a meeting, she called her mobile phone and answered it in front of everyone. Then in front of the manager, he said, "Okay, I'll look for you, rest assured, our manager is very good, just say that I have a stomachache." Then she stood up and said, "Manager, I want to take a leave of absence." The manager said: "You have a stomachache, I know, go ahead, I'm good at coaxing." "And then she was really gone...

6. The landlady told me to rent a house for her, and I happened to have a friend I paid a 6,000 deposit. In the afternoon the landlady went to see the house and felt satisfied, but raised a question, saying that it was a little scary to live in a two-bedroom apartment alone, and ordered me to live in it too. I'm just an employee, and the boss is what he says. After moving in, I consciously took on the housework, including helping her fold the quilt. At first, one person and one room, but then she changed my house into a gym, so I had to make it up with two people. But within a few days I was not happy, did she not want to pay rent to me like that?

7. After layers of selection, I became a life assistant to the billionaires. There is a subsidy of 500,000 per month, and the requirement is to take care of the food and living of the rich. Yesterday, the rich man handed me a Hillton room card and said to me: Eating and living, living is the most important! My mind was very confused, and I didn't know what was going on in the rich man's heart. I could only hand over the room card to his wife and say to him: Tonight, the boss asked you to get together in room 520 of the Hillton Hotel, invite you to dinner and have a very pleasant night!?

8. My husband and I both work at Foxconn, and together we can earn 20,000 yuan a month. On weekend weekends, I woke up at 6 a.m. and said to my husband, "Get up!" Let's go shopping! I want to buy a bag..." My husband stayed motionless and slept until 3 p.m. I stared at him deadly and said calmly, "If you have the ability, you will always sleep, don't get up!" ”?

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