1, the husband went to take a shower, and a female friend on his mobile phone sent a message: What are you doing? On a whim, I replied: I was thinking of you. The other person said: Really? I think it's boring, just go back

1, the husband went to take a shower, and a female friend on his mobile phone sent a message: What are you doing? On a whim, I replied: I was thinking of you. The other person said: Really? I felt bored, so I replied: I sent the message just now, I am his wife. The other party seconds back: Great! I wondered: Huh? What's too good? The other party said: While they are not there, let's talk for a while, right? I'm her husband!

2, get up in the morning, go downstairs to buy breakfast, found a couple because they want to buy Mercedes-Benz or Audi quarrel, women want to buy Mercedes-Benz said good-looking, men want to buy Audi said mature and safe. They agreed to go one to the left, one to the right, and after a hundred steps to turn back and if they could see each other, they would be reconciled. They took a step each, and they didn't hold back and turned back. As a result, they broke up anyway because the smog was too bad.....

3, the night is about to go to bed, my wife said that she is hungry, want me to order a takeaway. I said to my wife: Honey, you still eat, you are about to fat into a ball. The wife said angrily: Do you dare to say it again?? Me: You're really fat again. The wife roared angrily: Who gave you the courage to say it a second time!! Add another pizza to the takeaway, or wait for a new keyboard.

4, there is a little girl opposite my house, my son goes to play with her every day, today the little girl came to my house to play. The son took out the juice I had just bought for him, poured a glass for the little girl, and then poured himself a small cup with the bottle cap, and touched the cup with the little girl, and after drinking it, the son pretended to be drunk, and his body was shaking. The little girl was very happy and laughed at him: this is juice, not wine, you will not be drunk. The son replied: It was the little dimples on your face that made me drunk... The little girl smiled even happier... I looked at the side stunned, the daughter-in-law has ah.

5, school holidays, on the weekend my mother and I just returned from the mall, I heard an unknown scream at home. Immediately opened the door defensively, and when he entered the house, he saw that it was the fitness brother who was beating his nephew's ass!!!! When the mother saw the situation, she punched the elder brother: What is this, beating my obedient grandson to the whole time? The nephew seemed to see the hope of life, and the speed of one hundred and eighty miles suddenly sneaked behind his mother. The elder brother took out his nephew's final results from the table and showed them to his mother. Mom: I'm dripping a good one, this is not as high as my blood pressure, you two continue... Don't stop!!!!

6. After three years with his boyfriend, he ran away with a 60-year-old rich woman who drove a Maybach. Even one of them came to fool me and said: "Boy, your life is very good, and you will develop in the future." I didn't want to pay attention to her, and my aunt then fooled me, saying one by one! Finally I couldn't stand it, yelling: After reading books for so many years, are you stupid? Will I believe you? So I shouted out all the recent unhappiness, and the aunt said awkwardly: I'm sorry, obesity changes fate. After hearing this sentence, I cried even more sadly...?

7. When I got off work, A car insurance seller called me and wanted me to buy some. I said, "Buy me three"! The girl on the other side of the phone said happily: "Okay sir, then please tell me the name, I will register here." I smiled and said, "I have a copy, you a share, and our future children have a copy!" "Just after the words were finished, the sister hung up the phone decisively.?

8. Working overtime in the Futukang workshop until nine o'clock, I had to hit a Didi. I didn't expect to hit the Maybach s450, and I watched it carefully after getting on the bus. But after driving for a while, I didn't feel right, so I said to the master, "Master, I have never taken a taxi before on this road?" The driver master said calmly: "They have their choice, I have my choice, and you will reach the same destination, but you have chosen me, you have to take this road." "I really didn't expect ah, to drive the Maybach is to have culture!"

9, once came back late, from the door rushed in, just when our cat was scared by me to fly. It was six months old, and now it's a year old, and almost every time I run up, it jumps out from behind the door to scare me. And this guy scared me in exactly the same position every time, stood up and raised his front paws to jump forward, I brought my cat with me.?

10, when I went to bed last night, I looked at my sleeping girlfriend and couldn't help but think about her whole, just when a mosquito stopped on her cheek. As I raised my hand to shoot it, the mosquito cried and said, "Today is my birthday, please don't kill me." "After I listened, I carefully put the mosquito in the palm of my hand and clapped my hands while singing a birthday song, do you think I am witty???

11, fa small home decoration, I went to help him install chandeliers, I took a cloth underneath to support the lamp, buddy screw screws, screws a little more, several minutes did not screw on. My arm was very tired, and when I saw my little sister coming, I said, "Little sister, you come over and take care of me." His sister hesitated for a moment and motioned for me to repeat. I had to say again: You take my place, my arm is very tired. This time his sister didn't hesitate to fly up and kick at my P shares...

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #