Recently, I have heard many people say: We Shandong people do not let women eat at the table, and today I, a Shandong person, will talk about my feelings for 30 years.
30 years ago, if someone said that Shandong people did not entertain guest women on the table, there really was. Notice that women don't come to the table, not that women aren't allowed to come to the table.
When I was a child, the guests in the house sat next to the man, and if the child sat down, there would be adults who said: Go and go! Go aside and give up your seat to your uncle, but the woman doesn't sit.
Entertaining guests, grandma, mother are busy in the kitchen, almost the guest side and the kitchen side is eating while cooking, many times afraid that the housewife can not eat, will be a separate grilled in the kitchen, you can eat while busy.
Because the housewife is busy to the end, eating at the table is also eating leftovers, and it does not prevent the woman from being on the table.
In addition to these 1 cases, there is also my aunt's kind that really does not come to the table.
My aunt is 17 years older than my dad, now in her 70s, and is the child my grandfather picked up.
When my aunt was still in her infancy, my grandfather picked it up on the railway and listened to him say: In the snowy weather, if you don't pick it up, you will die.
My grandmother, a lady of the landlord's family, taught my aunt and my father the concept from an early age: the door does not go out of the second door, and men and women are not seated at seven years old.
At the same time, my grandmother is also a hot landlord lady, when I was a child, I went out to play with my friends, and when I came back, she would scold me: Xiao Nizi's family did not stay home all day, nor did she work... Not afraid of jokes... So every time I go out to play, I will take a chopstick and a cotton thread out, cut the top of the chopsticks into a circle of grooves, and then tie the cotton thread, while playing, pick up poplar leaves and string them up, and when I go home, I will pull a large string of "caterpillars" to burn her, so that I don't get scolded when I go home.
When I was a teenager, I went to my uncle's house to visit relatives, but it was not a festival, so I simply followed my parents to visit my aunt.
However, cooking is the aunt's job, boiling water is the aunt's job, the uncle is only responsible for chatting and entertaining the guests, after making the meal, the men eat and drink, the aunt is in the kitchen, put the rest of the dishes on the plate into a bowl, the left hand tip of the bowl, the palm of the hand is still stuffed with half a steamed bun, the right hand with chopsticks to sit in the kitchen to eat.
Dad and uncle and cousin they ate and chatted in the house, and from time to time they shouted for help with steamed buns and poured water.
I went to pull my aunt into the house for dinner, and I didn't pull her into the house with all my strength.
What does it feel like? Patriarchy does not simply explain this phenomenon.
It can be understood that the early rules in Shandong were relatively heavy, and women had the concept of "different seats between men and women", and always felt that it was a kind of blasphemy against women when women and men sat on a table...
Even now, 30 years later, there is no obvious saying that women can't sit with men, and there is no clear feeling that women can't go to the table, only to see if they want to.
Two days ago to my uncle's house as a guest, the east house woman a table, the south house man a table, the men's house that side of the smoke, push the cup to change the cup, the seat is very orderly, the main escort, the deputy companion, the three P, the four companions have their own position, the old, the young, toast, circle, serve tea and pour water, serve dishes, persuade the wine have their own things to do. This is also the reason why women don't eat together.
My family entertains guests, in addition to the old man does not sit down, the old man does not dare to move with chopsticks, there is nothing else, a total of 3 tables, a table can drink and smoke, sitting is my grandmother and grandfather and 3 uncles who can drink, as well as cousins, my husband and brother-in-law, all smoke and drink.
The second table was a female dependent, my mother-in-law entertained, sitting on 4 aunts, 2 cousins, me and my eldest sister-in-law with children.
The third table was for children, about seventy or eighty children sitting at will, eating vegetables and not being able to stand up.
If the dishes on the child's table are finished and you still want to eat, you can serve them on our table or on the men's table, and there are no taboos.
After all, Shandong is the birthplace of Confucianism, there are many rules, the New Year procedures are complicated, the hospitality of guests is also exquisite, perhaps there were women who did not go to the table before, perhaps a family inherited the meaning of women not on the table, but not all families are like that.
After all, from the perspective of human nature, they are all our relatives, how can it be so excessive.
Our grandmothers are treated as ancestors, dinner, New Year's Day, birthday or festival, not only children and grandchildren to let the smoke toast to her but also to make her happy! #Boom boom over the year # #山东人吃饭女人不上桌 #
