Don't be afraid of real bad people, you are afraid of fake good people.
The evil that is exposed is not terrible, and whoever suffers a loss will have a memory. Evil hidden under good intentions is frightening.
There is no such thing as being unconditionally good to you, and many things are complicated. As the old saying goes: If you have nothing to offer, you are either a traitor or a thief. No one can defeat human nature.
I have seen a story where seven people live together, there is a shortage of food, and their daily rations are a big bucket of porridge.
However, this bucket of porridge has become a knot in their hearts, because how to divide it is not good, there are always some people who have more in the bowl, and some people who have less in the bowl.
In the end, someone came up with a method: take turns dividing the porridge, but the person who divided the porridge had to wait for the others to finish picking and take the last bowl left.
Therefore, in order not to let themselves eat the least, everyone tried to divide it evenly, and the contradiction was solved.
Of course, we can't say that these people who share the porridge are bad people, and what they do is just to obey human nature.
I just want to say this question to tell everyone that human nature is selfish. Therefore, there must be demons when things go wrong, and we must learn to protect ourselves and be wary of such "good people" around us.
Moral kidnapping, persuade you to be generous
There is a kind of person, false hypocrisy, who always stands on the moral high ground and judges the problem, of course, provided that the matter does not involve himself.
Once watching a movie, a good emotional and rich tear-jerking film, I was disturbed by a bear child as if I was in a playground.
A girl on the side said, whose children don't care? In the back row, a parent who was five seats diagonally separated came and led the child away. By the way, people are really careful now, the cinema is your home?
The girl did not respond, and when the time came to leave, she found the parent and asked him to apologize. Some people were surrounded by a lot of noise, and some of them said, "Forget it, it's just a child", "This little thing, there is no need to make such a serious fuss".
Many times, if you don't care about yourself, your temperament becomes extraordinary, and moral kidnapping in disguise is terrible.
I have seen an interview where my husband is a well-known man who has been using most of his salary to support others since he started working. After getting married and having children, this is still the case, and the wife's salary has to support a large family.
On the child's birthday, his wife bought the sneakers that the child had always wanted, which he also used to fund, and criticized and educated his son not to have selfish desires.
His wife was overwhelmed and wanted a divorce. But he was reprimanded by the people around him. The husband earns a reputation, and the wife has a bad reputation throughout her life.
If you want to be a good person and a good person, you can, provided that you don't affect others by paying yourself. Otherwise, they are not really good people, or even evil people who have pulled a family into the abyss.
Pretend to listen, snoop on privacy
We have been curious since childhood. This is also normal by nature, and it is precisely because of curiosity and curiosity that human beings can progress.
But the terrible thing is that some people have plenty of time and energy, but they don't use these advantages rationally, but use them to spy on other people's privacy.
They usually appear as a confidant sister and a warm-hearted big brother, giving you a gentle and rational feeling, so that you can rest assured that your troubles, problems, inner words and interrogations are expressed.
Unfortunately, even some advice from them is not practical. Instead, turn your head and your secret becomes the capital that they can use to bring them closer together when they make friends with others.
Why do people want to snoop on someone else's privacy? Curiosity is a reason, and so is controlling psychology.
Some people always want to grasp more of other people's secrets, so that they have more control over others. When you encounter a situation that is unfavorable to you, you can threaten others and protect yourself.
But if we meet such a person, but we know the face and do not know the heart, we are extremely dangerous.
Because you have revealed your softest side to others, and that other person can choose to treat you as an outcast at any time for your own benefit.
And you trust the other person wholeheartedly and treat him as a good person, but you don't know that there is a good person who is more dangerous than a bad person.
Don't love yourself, accumulate resentment
A person who does not know how to be good to himself must not know how to be good to others.
The heroine Esther in "Orphan Complaint", in order to provoke the relationship between her adoptive parents, directly broke her own hand, and then married her adoptive mother.
People who don't know how to love themselves are not only cruel to others, but also to themselves. And this kind of fierceness is the resentment that is derived and accumulated without knowing how to love oneself; the other is the hostility that is done at all costs in order to achieve one's own goals.
They do not love themselves, always deliberately try to please others and grievance themselves, at first glance it seems harmless to people and animals, but everyone's ability to bear is limited, once this resentment accumulates to a certain extent, it will definitely spread outward.
And for such people, usually we are defenseless. In fact, they are also pitiful and pathetic, but it does not prevent them from appearing in everyone's field of vision in a kind of image of being miserable and wronged, reflecting that the people who oppose him are so hateful.
And the kind of person who can hurt his body in order to achieve his own goals is even more terrifying. It is counterintuitive for a person not to even love himself, but to say that he loves others.
For things that go against common sense and go against human nature, we must keep one more eye in our hearts.
Such a so-called good person, it is easy to push people with normal needs to a level of selfishness, you are sorry for him, as if you are sorry for the whole world.
My dear readers and friends please remember one sentence:
The healthiest and longest-lasting relationship between people is to complete each other, not to sacrifice one to perfect the other.
There is a concept in psychology called the voyeuristic effect. It means that when a person's eyes can only see things through a tube, then he can only see what is inside the tube.
This is like a frog at the bottom of a well, controlling its own vision, while putting itself in danger without knowing it.
The heart of harming others must not be there, and the heart of preventing people must not be without.
If you want to live less hard in this society, you must understand the law of the jungle, look at the world with a good heart, and be wary of the "good people" around you who are more dangerous than the real villains.
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The world is so big, thank you, you can see me!
[Wen | Wei Wei'an: the pen has temperature, for the voice of emotion, an atypical writer who loves words, invites you to perceive life together]