1, the first time I slept with my boyfriend, I hid in the bed and did not dare to come out. My boyfriend saw that I was unwilling and embarrassed to force me, so we fell asleep at a long distance

1, the first time I slept with my boyfriend, I hid in the bed and did not dare to come out. My boyfriend saw that I was unwilling and embarrassed to force me, so we fell asleep at a long distance. At night, suddenly the boyfriend said that this life is so short. At that time, I slipped into his arms and asked him shyly: Have you ever fought for anyone? As a result, the boyfriend came to say: My stomach has been frozen for an hour, and I don't cover the quilt anymore, and I guess I really have diarrhea

2. I lost my left leg due to an accident when I worked in an electronics factory, and after my job was gone, I did live broadcasting at home. Later, I met a rich woman fan, and we added A V letter and talked well, so I was ready to go to Henan to find her. But because I didn't have much money on my body, I had to take a long-distance bus. In the car, I suddenly heard a woman anxiously saying: My son can't hold back, who has an empty bottle, borrow me to use it!! In the spirit of helping others, I put the large bottle of drink in my hand to my mouth, lifted my head and drank it all, and handed the bottle to her. Half an hour later, I asked the driver with a look of pain: Master, how long will it take to get to the service area? I can't hold back!!

3, a woman bought a pair of shoes online, after receiving the courier, she saw a note at the bottom of the shoe box: "Today was scolded by the boss, give you an extra pair, don't ask, deliberately !!! But the woman looked through the courier box and did not find the extra pair of shoes, only to understand that the delivery man was naughty, and she was teased. Although she was very satisfied with the quality of the shoes purchased online, the woman was still very angry, she took a picture of the note, gave the merchant a bad review, and wanted the boss to punish the "untrustworthy" shipper! The shipper may just feel bored at work, improvise a bit, did not expect the woman to be so stingy, did not take advantage of the complaint to complain about themselves, dumbfounded!

4, I am 28 years old this year, I have not had menstruation, I am very scared but embarrassed to say it. Yesterday, I finally plucked up the courage to go to the hospital gynecological examination. When the gynecologist listened to my account, he sighed and said that it is normal for men not to menstruate. When I heard the doctor's advice and suppressed the worry in my heart for nearly 30 years, I finally let go, and I felt much more relaxed

5, the wife is a woman, the courage is greater than my man. Today at Shanghai Disneyland, I propose to play a roller coaster. The wife said indifferently: "Just go up and see the scenery." When I was ready to start, I took out the screw prop and shouted to my wife: "How did the screws in your seat fall off?" "As a result, the wife was really scared to pee, hahahahaha...

6. My sister-in-law is nine months pregnant, and suddenly wants to eat five-minute cooked Filet steak, so she can't take her to eat it. I was eating it when I suddenly had abdominal pain and was pushed into the delivery room. Halfway through the operation, the doctor came out and said to the husband, "Your wife has a difficult birth, do you want to protect the adult or the child?" The old man did not hesitate at all: "Lord Bao! The doctor looked shocked: "Are you sure of Bao Da?" Don't you need to think? The old man looked puzzled: "Thinking about what?" I'm her dad, not her husband! ”

7. My daughter-in-law used my Jingdong white strips to buy a weighing scale. After the arrival of the goods, the daughter-in-law will often stand up with the family's teddy to weigh. Today, she wrapped her dog and shouted happily: "Skinny! I actually got thinner on a business trip! I said helplessly: "Daughter-in-law, this is not that you are thin, it is the dog that is thin, you have been traveling for a few days, I myself eat instant noodles, there is nothing to feed it." ”

8. On the train, the man is alone in a soft bed, and a woman pushes the door in and inserts the door. Open your chest, scratch your hair and say: Give 5,000 yuan, otherwise shout that you are flirting with me. The man was stunned for a moment, took out a pen and paper from his bag and wrote: I am deaf and mute, what do you want to do? The woman took the pen and wrote down what she had just said on the paper. The man smiled and closed the note to open the door: You can go out.

9, (Fu) in the toilet squatting pit, I put the mobile phone in the living room to charge, suddenly came to the phone, so first let the mother help to pick up. Only to see my mother pick up the phone and look at the screen, and then shouted heartily: Dad! Then stunned for 3 seconds, quickly threw the phone to me! I was also a little confused, picked up the phone and said: Hello, Grandpa? Then I heard my dad's depressed voice on the other end of the phone: Who are you?

10, my girlfriend and I met in college, the two of us confirmed the relationship in the first year of college and fell in love! When I first started, I didn't expect that she could actually eat two bowls of rice in one meal, and the amount of food was very large. At noon today, my brother took her home once, and she was afraid of not having enough to eat and the second bowl would be embarrassed, so she secretly told me to press a little tighter when serving rice. I did as I was told, and a bowl of rice was pounded and pressed against the pan with a rolling pin. At the dinner table, she used chopsticks to put a pestle on the rice, the stone slipped like a stone, and the bang finally came a few times, the chopsticks broke, and everyone at the table stared at her bowl of rice in shock.

11. My sister-in-law came to my house, pointed to a red piggy bank and asked me: "Wow, brother-in-law, this piggy bank is so beautiful, is there money in it?" I replied, "No, it's an ornament!" The sister-in-law smiled: "Brother-in-law, will you give it to me?" Me: "This..... This is my gift to your sister! At this time, the daughter-in-law interjected: "An empty piggy bank, what's wrong with giving it to my sister, sister, like to take it!" "The sister-in-law happily took the piggy bank away, I went, she must have seen me saving money for my private room!?"

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