1. The professor sits opposite the peasant on the train. When bored, the professor said: I have a problem, if you don't know, give me 5 yuan; If you come up with a question, if I don't know, give you 500 yuan, such as

1. The professor sits opposite the peasant on the train. When bored, the professor said: I have a problem, if you don't know, give me 5 yuan; If you come up with a question, if I don't know, I will give you 500 yuan, how? Farmers agree. PROFESSOR: How far is the Moon from Earth? The farmer did not say a word and handed the professor 5 yuan. The farmer asked: Three legs up the mountain, four legs down the mountain, what kind of animal? The professor was puzzled and had no choice but to give the farmer 500 yuan. The farmer took the money and prepared to sleep. The professor asked: What is the animal with three legs up the mountain and four legs down the mountain? The farmer didn't say a word, handed the professor 5 yuan, and went to sleep! Low education and high IQ, too terrible!

2. A painter who makes a living by painting puts his works on display in a gallery, and a rich woman chooses a painting for a long time and finally selects the painter's painting. When the rich woman paid, the painter asked the rich woman: "Do you buy this painting because you like the subject matter, or because you like the style of my work?" The rich woman said, "Compared to coming and going, this painting is the widest, and it can cover three holes in the wall of my house." The painter said in utter disappointment, "That's the way it is! ”"

3. Two drunkards are drunk, one asking the other: Which one are you? A: I'm from Shandong. wow! I'm also from Shandong, fellow countryman, and have a drink. Q: Where are you from Shandong? A: I'm from Jinan. Wow, I'm also from Jinan, one more drink. Ask again: Which point are you in Jinan? Answer: Eight milewa' wow! What a coincidence, I'm also eight mile-old, and I'll have another drink. Then ask: What's your last name? A: My last name is Cheng. Ha ha! Hard or clever, I am also surnamed Cheng, and then do it! At this time, the owner of the barbecue shop really couldn't look at it anymore and called and said: Sister-in-law! Come on, your husband and your son have drunk too much!

4. I went to bed late with my girlfriend Hi Pi at night, and as a result, I overslept this morning. After I got dressed, I hurried to the company. Only later did I find out that my phone had been forgotten at home. Half an hour later, my mother actually sent it to me personally, and I was very moved. After my mother left, I opened my mobile phone and saw a text message: Son, your mobile phone forgot the window, do you want to send it to you?

5. The sister's birthday is approaching and she asks her brother-in-law for a birthday gift, and the brother-in-law sends a red envelope of 88.88 to her sister. The sister was very angry and yelled at her brother-in-law: "I am worth 88 yuan in your heart?? At this time, the niece next to her quickly helped her brother-in-law speak: "Mom, don't you understand? Dad is praising you for getting thinner in a different way, you think about how many pounds of meat can be bought for 88 yuan according to the cheapest meat calculation!! The sister was pleased to be told this by her niece.

6. Too angry, a good female colleague said that the child did not have money to pay tuition, borrowed 8800 yuan from me, and as a result, three days later, her family bought a car and set up a banquet, and sent invitations to all colleagues. Someone was curious to ask how much the car cost, and the female colleague's husband said triumphantly: "Good luck, 8800 yuan to buy a Jetta car." "You see. Am I being tricked? I bought a car for their family and returned it as a gift.

7. The sister-in-law was dumped after being played by the rich second-generation boyfriend, and she found the spare tire in her heartbreak. The spare tire took good care of her, and the sister-in-law followed the spare tire to eat the food street over and over again. Then asked the sister-in-law if her mood was better, and the sister-in-law shook her head and cried again. The spare tire was about to cry at that time, but the sister-in-law was embarrassed to tell him that he had eaten and felt bad!!

8. 1, 1, go to the market on the weekend to buy crayfish, by the way bought a bag of salt, the boss said good, I casually put the salt on the scale, the net weight of 500 salt is only 450 grams. I looked at the boss, who was also staring at me, and then "bar" all the crayfish I gave me and said: This selling name is really faceless!!!!!

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