There is a couple newly married soon. The husband was sent by the company to a foreign country to reside permanently. A year later, the husband returned home on leave. After a cloud and rain that night, the couple snored and fell asleep. There was a sudden knock at the door in the middle of the night

There is a couple newly married soon. The husband was sent by the company to a foreign country to reside permanently. A year later, the husband returned home on leave. After a cloud and rain that night, the couple snored and fell asleep. There was a sudden knock at the door in the middle of the night. The husband jumped up from his sleep and exclaimed, "Not good! Your husband is back! The wife muttered, "No way, he's abroad." ＂

Once upon a time, there was a stupid son, married a good daughter-in-law, and entered the cave house after visiting the church. Dumb Er felt strange, so he asked his daughter-in-law, "Hey hey, what name did I call you?" The daughter-in-law was angry and funny, so she replied to him: "Shout to Prince Yan." On the wedding night, the husband and wife slept one head each, and the wife used her feet to hook her husband, and after the idiot was woken up, she didn't know what to do, so she called out to his father: "Father, you see, Yama Wang ye is hooking me." When his father heard this, he was shocked, and he loudly told Yama Wangye: "Yama Wangye, Yama Wangye, my son is still young, I am already old, if you want to hook me, you can hook me." ”

I was a coach at the driving school, and today when I was a teacher, a female student gave me 2,000 yuan when she first got on the bus. I quickly refused when I saw it: "You can't bribe the coach, this is not good." The female trainee hurriedly said: "Coach, I am not paying bribes, this 2,000 yuan is for you to buy life insurance." "Me: ...

I have been working outside for more than a year and have not come home. Near the end of the year, the boss issued a 10w bonus and finally stepped on the train home. Just got off the train, and it was already 1 o'clock in the morning when I looked at my phone. So I called a Didi, and I didn't expect to come to a Porsche 911. After a day on the train, I was so sleepy that I took a nap on the train. When I woke up and saw that I was almost home, I said, "Master, turn right in front of you." The master was so frightened that his soul was lost: "Oh my grandmother! How come there is a person behind! ”

Foxconn went out of business, employees went home from vacation, and I took my son to the zoo to see monkeys. In the zoo, my son saw that the monkey was specially surnamed Fen, shouted, saying that he also wanted to keep one, and I told my son: "But I don't know where to sell it?" The son looked disappointed, but after a while, he asked me: "Dad, the teacher said that we were monkeys, right?" I smiled and nodded, and he suddenly realized, "Oh, no wonder there are fewer and fewer monkeys, more and more people." ”

I am a homeroom teacher in the first year of Maotanchang Middle School. Today I angrily asked a student, "Why copy the class leader's homework?" Students: "Copying homework can't actually be called copying homework, language is called reference, mathematics is called analogy, English is called copy, geographical is migration, biological is transcription, physical is a reference system, chemical is called isomerism, politically called seeking common ground while reserving differences, history is the great unification of culture." When the students finished speaking, there was thunderous applause in the class...

Attending his party with his brothers with his husband, drunk to the half-drunk, they talked about what was particularly memorable, some said that they stepped on the snake on the toilet in the middle of the night, some said that they met their ex-girlfriends on a blind date... My husband smiled and said that the most memorable thing was that my daughter-in-law went to my house for the first time. His buddies all laughed badly, and they all coaxed, and said quickly, how unforgettable? Who knew that the husband took a sip of wine, and Yu Yu said: "The first time I saw the magic of makeup, I saw my daughter-in-law's face after removing makeup!" ”

Today I worked overtime until twelve o'clock in the evening to leave work, so I was too tired to hit Didi home, the car that came was BMW 530, and the driver was a beautiful woman. As soon as I got in the car, she asked me, "Do you want a horse?" I wondered what I wanted the horse to do, so I was resolute: "Don't! She was immediately upset when she heard it, and directly drove me out of the car, and I was still confused!

At the class reunion, I sat at the same table, and she whispered to me, "I heard you're not married." How? Still waiting for me! I nodded jokingly. She quietly grabbed my hand and whispered, "Wait a few years for me, and when the kids go to college I'll get a divorce." "Mader, I was angry at once, she was only 6 years old, let me wait another 12 years. I threw away her hand in a huff and said loudly, "Men and women can't kiss, don't take my hand." Everyone heard the news and looked at us, the female classmates bowed their heads in embarrassment, and I said: "It's okay, we have a little conflict..." The next day, the female colleague called me and said: "Brother, let's get married!" ”

I borrowed 500,000 yuan from my father and paid a down payment to buy a house. In order to pay off the mortgage, the husband went to work on the construction site, which was particularly hard. Yesterday I was resting at home and went to deliver food to my husband at noon. The family dog was also accompanying her husband on the construction site, so I took dog food for the dog. Maybe the dog was really hungry, and as soon as I threw the plastic bag to the ground, the dog tore open the bag and devoured it. After meeting my husband, I handed him the convenience bag for the meal, and he opened it and saw a box of dog food!!

#Funny paragraph # #搞笑 #