1, the mother with 4-year-old daughter to the unit to play, this little girl is smart and clever, the addition and subtraction within the number 100 will be counted, everyone has a variety of questions to test her, this little girl is all right

1, the mother with 4-year-old daughter to the unit to play, this little girl is smart and clever, the addition and subtraction within the number 100 will be counted, everyone has a variety of questions to test her, this little girl is all right. At this time, someone gave the little girl a difficulty: "Little friend, how much is 1 minus 2?" The little girl looked at the man and said, "You're such a stupid person that you've made a mistake in the title!"

2, someone went to eat spicy hot put half a bowl of chili oil, after eating a taxi home, walking and asking the driver; Do I fart? The driver said urgently; You let go, and I didn't block your asshole. This is good, a fart for 15 minutes, he is comfortable, just look at the blue smoke coming out of the car, can not see the road, the driver hit the double flash forward, a moment and asked the driver I put a fart line? At this time, the driver cried and said: Big brother, don't let go, the smell will be even if it is hot.

3, that will, especially like a girl, for her I practiced hard to cook the skill, finally in a party to show their skills, won a full of applause, the girl was also surprised to say to me, I can't imagine that your dish is so good, in fact, I think the boy who likes to cook is not out of the ordinary... Later, she married a cook!

4, a few days ago, the teacher recorded the children in the self-study writing homework video, I suddenly found that the son's table, the little girl used the pencil is my son's, the eraser is also my son's, my family boy, using a small pencil head, next to there is a fingernail-sized eraser, the magic is back from school in the afternoon, all the stationery is back, in the pencil box, son, what is this cao work?

5, the other day, I met a beautiful woman on social networking sites. The two of us talked well, so we added her V letter. As soon as I looked at her circle of friends, my saliva flowed down in an instant!!! This figure, this look, is simply the goddess of my dreams!!! So, I asked her: You are so beautiful, your figure is really good, how did you keep it??? She was sincere and sincere, and came directly to a sentence: p's !!!

6. When going to work, I have a very close feeling to a colleague. Show her dad a picture of her before. Dad had a serious look: she was 20 years ago... Our cousin's lost daughter, I remember this birthmark, your boy has done such a thing in his life... No wonder I feel a sense of closeness, I thought I liked people... Thanks..

7, last month lent a housemate a thousand yuan, today he will pay me back, and call me more than a hundred, said it is interest, I said you don't do this, on our relationship to return what interest, next time is not allowed to do this, you want to do this again, I will lend you a hundred thousand.

8, the president chat paragraph: just graduated students went to the top 500 companies to apply, the result was that when the interview materials were handed over, they accidentally knocked the interviewer's mobile phone down on the ground and broke it, and the interviewer looked helpless. At this time, the classmate said: "Leader, I will lose you, but I have no money now, so I will deduct it from my salary next month!" Then he went in.

9, Shi tai likes to play LOL, played more than 8,000 blind monks. On that occasion, the abbot said to Shi Tai, "Honey, I often dream of being a millionaire!" Shi Tai said dismissively, "No, I can make you a billionaire." The abbot asked Shi Tai with a shocked face: "Is it really fake?" Shi Tai said, "Really, I use my hands to fulfill your dreams!" ”

More than 10 years ago, the first job after graduating from college was to be a secretary to a group boss! In less than a week, at the plenary meeting of the group company, he received the roll call of praise from the boss: The little soldier will definitely have a big appearance in the future, every time he takes him out, as soon as his ass is in the passenger seat, he can immediately fall asleep. This ability to make up for sleep at any time, I am quite envious, but also very good! That ~ the human resources department to arrange it, starting tomorrow, let him go home and sleep well!

11, the same community and my age of the leather egg has always been bald, I once convulsed to touch his head, asked him why is he always bald? He was angry, he met me every time he met me, and last night he met this kid in the supermarket again, deliberately pushing me! I'm on fire, and I have to make a threat today, or he'll be my sick cat!" I grabbed him by the collar and asked him to apologize!

12, classmates came to Wuhan on business, I took him back to my hometown, and we both drank too much at night. In the morning, when we finished packing up and returning, my mother brought a snakeskin bag in the corner of the courtyard and asked my classmates to bring it back, I said what is this, my mother patted me and said: "Onion!" Last night he sat there and ate this thing, eating one bite and throwing one bite and one throwing one, like a monkey eating peach! "I...

13, my baby son's hair was surprisingly good as soon as he was born, and it was dark and long. My daughter-in-law said to me, 'Husband, let's make a fetal brush for the baby!' I said, "My son's hair is so good, I guess he can make more than one, right?" The daughter-in-law smiled and said, "Oh, yes, husband, then make a fetal hair mop!" ”

14, I especially like abstract drawing, so I bought a lot of photos of the runaway comics to paste in my room, and once my girlfriend came to my house as a guest. She saw my wall of rampage cartoons and asked me if I still had this habit, I explained that it was mainly used to ward off evil spirits, and my girlfriend laughed after hearing it: "Just like you, take off your makeup to sleep ghosts can scare away, and also use to ward off evil spirits?" ”

15, I am working, colleague Xiao Li pointed to the mobile phone and said: "Someone sent a post, if you are a staff member, how will you wash Luo Zhixiang white?" Zhang San: "This is not easy to do, it is all black like this, how to wash it white?" Me: "This post may have been from Luo Zhixiang, who intends to brainstorm." ”