1. Seven years after graduation, I finally took over a big project, built a thirty-meter chimney, the construction period was two months, and the cost was 300,000, but it was necessary to advance funds. It was finally done at the end of last year. Today people go

1. Seven years after graduation, I finally took over a big project, built a thirty-meter chimney, the construction period was two months, and the cost was 300,000, but it was necessary to advance funds. It was finally done at the end of last year. Today, people go to the acceptance, and they are scolded to death, and they have no money to take it. Damn it! The drawings looked the other way around, and they were digging a well!

2, a drunk man accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by to watch, a policeman came over: what happened? Drunkard: I don't know, I just arrived.



3. The doctor asks the patient how the fracture is broken. The patient said that I felt that there was sand in my shoes, so I shook my shoes with the pole. TMD had an asshole pass by, thought I was electrocuted, and grabbed a stick and gave me two sticks!

4, one day, the cow gave the donkey a problem, asked the word "stupid" under the two bugs which is only male and which is female. The donkey racked his brains, but still could not answer. The cow scolded: What a stupid donkey, male left female right!

5. The turtle is injured. Let the snail go buy the medicine. After 2 hours. The snail has not returned. The turtle scolded urgently: "Fuck don't come back lao tzu will die!" At this time, a snail's voice came from outside the door: You say Lao Tzu is not going!

6, someone raises a pig, annoyed, abandoned, but the pig knows the way back, the number of abandonment is useless. One day, his car turned a lot of abandoned pigs, and he called his family late at night and asked: "Is the pig home?" Answered: "Returned!" He roared: "Let it answer the phone, Lao Tzu is lost!" "

7, the elephant accidentally stepped on the ant nest, the ants poured out of the nest, have climbed on the elephant. The elephants shook their bodies, and the ants fell. At this time, there was also an ant on the neck of the elephant, and the fallen ant shouted loudly to "strangle it".

8, a day of computer class, there is a row of classmates' computers crashed. So a classmate stood up and said, "Teacher, the computer is dead, our platoon is all dead." At this time, many of my classmates said, "We are also dead." At this time, the teacher asked, "Who else is not dead?" Only one classmate stood up: "I'm not dead yet!" The teacher said strangely: "The whole class is dead, why don't you die?" ”

9, a monkey must first stuff the butt before eating peanuts and then take it out to eat. The administrator explained: Someone once fed it peaches, but the peach core could not be pulled out, and the monkey was scared, and now it must be measured and eaten.

10, Xiaoming: "Daddy, am I a stupid child?" Dad: "Silly child, how can you be a stupid child..."

11, a person just learned a foreign language, this day walking on the street, accidentally stepped on the feet of a foreigner, the person hurriedly said: "I'm sorry." The foreigner also said politely: "I'm sorry too." When the man heard this, he hurriedly said, "I'm sorry three." The foreigner was dumbfounded and asked, "What are you sorry for?" The man said helplessly, "I'm sorry five."

12, a patient with indigestion complained to the doctor: I have been very abnormal lately, what to eat, eat cucumber to pull cucumber, eat watermelon to pull watermelon, how to return to normal? The doctor is silent for a moment, then you can only eat.

13, someone went to Shanghai on a business trip and lost a dollar on the street, the police said: "We must help you find" After a month, the person went again, the street where he lost money was dug up because of the construction of roads, and he could not help but sigh "Shanghai is the real."

14, one day an ant was basking in the sun, suddenly saw an elephant slowly approaching, busy getting up and straightening its front legs, the rabbit next to you was busy asking what are you doing? The ant said, "Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh