1
I have a lover P who has been together for almost seven years. We get along happily, almost everything we talk about, especially in sexual life, we can discuss each other and pursue common satisfaction together. We would also meet to sing, play ball, eat, watch movies, go on outings, and even travel to other provinces. Arguably of all my friends of the opposite sex, I have the easiest time with him and can talk about the most topics.
We met in the Drift bottle, and yes, that's the magical platform. At first, I thought it was a place to make a wish or vent my emotions, so when I clashed with my mother-in-law, she took my one-and-a-half-year-old son away and went back to my hometown, I was very angry but there was no way, and after communicating with my husband without success, I sent some more negative words in the drift bottle, and I didn't expect to receive a reply from P. We left QQ for each other.
P is very talkative, not only comforting me, but also making me feel that chatting with strangers is a pleasant and relaxing thing.
During the chat, I learned that P is a local, just divorced, has a 4-year-old son, the wife is relatively strong, or a brother-in-law, long-term use of his salary to supplement the mother's family, when they are together they often quarrel. I asked him for a picture, and after reading it, I felt good - he was tall, looked very energetic, and had the idea of meeting.
Here is my husband, he is a good old man, good to me, very careful, but the level of education is not high, not much money, not much self-motivated, no planning for the future, a look of getting by. Because his family was not well-off, there was no bride price when he got married, and after marriage, I also used the dowry to help him pay off more than 20,000 debts. We buy houses, decorate, get married, have children, except for the tens of thousands of yuan given to us by our mother's family, the rest are on our own.
The first time I met P, it was still a bit awkward. We went to the movie together, watched him keep sending messages, I thought he might not be interested in me, so he was ready to sneak away from the toilet, but in the end he chose to stay politely, but he didn't expect to stay for seven years.
Then we went to open a house and had an intimate relationship, and the idea at that time was to indulge myself for three months and come back after three months. So I deceived P with a picked up ID card, telling him that he was unmarried, 6 years younger than him, and a local based on the information of the fake ID. In fact, I was the same year as him, and my hometown was in another province.
After getting acquainted, we basically see each other every week. Probably because of the long-term work of coordinating reception, he can especially mobilize the atmosphere, there are endless words, I just need to listen quietly, never feel cold.
He also tried his best in terms of sex, developing various new positions, trying to make me orgasm, and always offered to give me mouths, which I refused at first, and then became very enjoyable. Our X was so harmonious that with him I could easily have a high chao, so much so that he later couldn't resist showing off to me that he had mastered the code of my body.
Three months together was fresh and exciting, and on the day we decided to separate, I invited him to dinner, saying that it was the last meal between the two of us, and that we would not see each other again tomorrow. He was very sad and said: Will you forget me? I replied very seriously: Why forget? Good people and things are remembered for a lifetime, as long as we are sincere and happy at this moment, it is enough. These are my true words.
After blocking him for a week, he added me every day, saw that I did not respond, and sent a small essay to my mailbox, saying that he missed me very much and felt very uncomfortable thinking of me. I was also a little reluctant, and after a month of entanglement, I finally re-added him with a soft heart.
He happily invited me to dinner to celebrate, during which he asked me how I was so cruel and what I had been doing all month. I casually said that I was married, and he immediately forgave me and said that he understood my desperation. Then he apologized to me and confessed to me that he and his wife were not actually divorced, but just had a fight, and the TV tablets at home were smashed by my wife. In fact, I don't care about this, after all, I didn't plan to be together for a long time.
That night he took me to the lake, sat in the car and told me about the nasty relatives in his family when he was a child, and the first time he went to KFC to eat five hamburgers after earning money, he said that there used to be two cats in the family, and every time the big cat bullied the kitten, he would go all over the house to pick it up, and finally the big cat could always hide accurately under a big stool, he couldn't reach it, it knew it was safe, and he didn't want to come out again. He looked down at me and said he really liked me and hoped we could be each other's last stool.
It was a very beautiful night, the soft moonlight sprinkled on our faces, everything was so calm and peaceful, and we were also sincere.
2
Later, I blacked him out again, it was the third year of our acquaintance, when his unit was laid off, he took the initiative to do a buyout, but because the work was temporarily unsettled, the pressure was great, the wife fell on him every day, he kept complaining to me, bringing me a lot of negative energy, and I didn't care much, meeting was to open a room to solve physiological needs, which made me extremely disgusted, and simply blocked him. It was during that time that he was taking the examination for the director's certificate, and he did not bother me much, and he was at ease studying at home.
Almost a year later, he sent me crazy emails to tell me that he had passed the exam, and at the same time told about the hard work and efforts of the year, saying that the first person who wanted to notify me when he passed the exam was me. I was happy for him too, and finally passed him again.
He asked me why I deleted him again, and this time I lied to him that the baby had just been born because she was pregnant. After listening to it, he hugged me and said very movingly that every time you disappeared, you didn't want to cause me trouble!
Since then, I feel like he trusts me more, whether it's at work, between friends, or what happens between husband and wife and family, he was the first to tell me. I said I wanted to eat the food he made, and he found the opportunity to do it in the company's kitchen, and then drove more than 20 kilometers to bring it to me.
In the following years, we experienced two job hops together, I only gained some life experience because of my limited ability, and P, I watched him change from the anxiety when he first came into contact with the project to the calm and confident he is now.
From P, I feel that men really need to be trained, so I also try to encourage my husband to get out of his comfort zone, go out and exercise his ability, and don't soak in warm water for a lifetime because of a salary of thousands of yuan a month. Unfortunately, the world has different personalities, he thinks that as much money can be earned, he also enjoys the days of playing cards and drinking tea with colleagues after work every day, afraid that life will be more difficult after losing this stable job. Later, I no longer insisted, after all, I was older, and I knew that living a good life was never achieved by the efforts of others, even if the other party was the person closest to you. It is better to cultivate the next generation and have time to think of ways to develop side businesses on your own.
As for P and I, we are both more rational people in our bones and will not divorce each other. For seven years, we have used QQ to contact, and both sides tacitly ask each other's WeChat and mobile phone numbers. To be safe, we never spend the night out on dates, usually during the day, just my time. He is the vice president of the company and has relatively free working hours. Except for the occasional message on holidays, we almost never meet each other.
He and his wife still quarrel a lot. Two years ago, he changed cars, and the old car was given to his brother by his wife to drive. Last year, his brother was getting married, and his wife asked him to give him 60,000 red envelopes, and his father-in-law and mother-in-law and brother, who were paralyzed on the bed when they renovated the marriage room, moved to his house and asked him to buy vegetables and cook. All of this annoyed him, and he often made excuses to return late, sometimes with me, sometimes with his brothers to play cards.
In the first half of this year, they quarreled over some trivial matters, and finally moved their hands, I advised him not to try to reason with women when quarreling, first avoid, and wait until they calm down. After a while, he told me that he had been forced to endure the recent quarrels, and turned around to go to the balcony to smoke, and sure enough, the number of quarrels was less. Then he hugged me contentedly and said that I balanced his family, and without me, he and his wife might have been divorced.
He has a sweet mouth, always says that I have a good personality, look good and beautiful, and now I am more and more inseparable from me. He also said that when he was old, he would go to the same nursing home and take care of each other. His mother has an empty house near my house, and he often says that he will move in when he is old, and in case my husband is gone (my husband is more than 200 pounds, his living habits are poor, and his health is not very good), he hopes that I can live with him and accompany each other.
Often he said this, maybe he was serious, but I just listened silently and never responded. Pension together, in my opinion, is a man telling a utopian fairy tale to women, beautiful but far away.
3
P is actually a simple and realistic man. His pay card was handed over to his mother for safekeeping before marriage, and then transferred to his wife after marriage, and in his words, he was just a money-making machine at home. Although he has an annual salary of more than 200,000 yuan (which is still OK in this second-tier city), his wife only gives him a thousand pocket money every month, fortunately, he also has a little gray income.
I date him, in addition to opening a room, the cost of eating, singing, watching movies is mostly my burden, of course, sometimes he will invite me to eat and drink milk tea. I have sent him cups, scarves, couples mobile phone cases, clothes, he has sent me a book, a bottle of perfume, materially basically AA, but every New Year he will wrap me a red envelope.
He is very cautious, using cash to open the house, afraid that his wife will find the transaction records. One year on his birthday, I gave him a durian cake, and he ate a little, and threw away the rest, just for fear that his wife would get into trouble smelling the durian smell on the car. It is these small details that allow me to quickly put myself in the right position, and there is no gain or loss for this feeling.
I knew very well that he chose me to see me safe and independent, gentle and courteous to him, to be his emotional garbage can, and to satisfy his physical desires, which of course he liked, and he wanted to keep this good situation going. And me? It is nothing more than coveting that little bit of physical pleasure, and the little emotional value of his everything that follows me, of course, we are also very happy to read and chat together.
But now, I don't want to continue.
Seven years of his relationship with his wife has not eased a little, some time ago the other party finally suspected that he had someone outside, began to check his mobile phone, and he became more confident because of the increase in experience in recent years, perhaps because of my existence let him have a little confidence, his wife and then manage him is obviously a little inadequate. In fact, in addition to being strong and taking care of her mother's family, she can be okay with P, and the children are also much more managed by her.
And I don't want to ruin my hard-earned family because of P, although this home is relatively simple, but it is the place where I can shelter from the wind and rain. And I know that even without me, P will have someone else, and even if I don't touch P, I will encounter ABC or D. So sometimes the relationship between men and women is nothing more than the accidental collision of two lonely ghosts for a while, comforting each other's bodies and minds at a certain moment, and finally going back to the right track to live a good life.
But I still want to ask Yu Wei a question: Do you think the idea of retiring with your lover is reliable? I'd love to hear what people think about this.
Wei Wei replied:
We often lament friendship and get lost as we walk.
Looking back at our childhood friends, elementary school classmates, junior high school classmates, high school classmates, college classmates, how many are still in contact?
People are together because of needs.
Extramarital affairs, we criticize it, but no matter how much we criticize it, it will exist, because men and women in marriage have a huge need for it.
The first is the need for sex;
The second is emotional need;
The depression or blandness of a third marriage requires an outlet;
The fourth may also be mixed with interests;
The fifth may be for the sake of regret;
……
It is difficult to prohibit, so we advocate "knowing and stopping".
This extramarital affair of the heroine, jokingly said, the most worth learning may be their sense of security, seven years have not been found by each other's spouses a little hint, really extramarital affairs master, both enthusiastic and rational, security and confidentiality work done so well.
But what about security? Extramarital affairs also have a "seven-year itch", and it is time to break the extramarital affairs that only know that you know and I know.
I sometimes feel that in this case, their spouses are happy, because they don't know anything, a pair of years are quiet, and in the future, they will still be the most beautiful sunset red for their old husbands and wives.
And the female protagonist and the male protagonist, respectively, are the best marriage objects that her husband and his wife can get, and live a silly life, why not be a fool with a stupid fortune?
Why is it unlikely that the female protagonist and the male protagonist will retire together?
Just like when we graduated from school, everyone wrote "May friendship last forever" on the blessing, which is just a good wish, in fact, whether we can continue to maintain contact depends on the needs of both parties.
The two have an extramarital affair, tired of being together for seven years, as analyzed before, first of all, both parties have sexual needs, there are emotional comfort needs, the release needs of family chores, both are very sensible, especially the female protagonist, only take what she needs, and do not care about the man's material efforts, it can be said that it is a very perfect lover.
Imagine that when both parties are over 60 years old, the sexual needs are greatly reduced, the emotional comfort is no longer strong, and the focus of attention, emotional sustenance, and sense of belonging on both sides fall on their respective children.
If you choose to be fair and honest with each other, what is the impact on the child, and what does the child think?
The older you get, the more you want dignity, and the decades of secret love finally come together, is it not for the old disrespect? Is it a very serious injury to another close relative of the respective child? Will children hate?
In short, there is a risk of losing the respect of the child, and if one party is unwilling to take this risk, it is impossible to provide for the elderly together.
Some people think that two people can talk very well and it will be good to be together, but the so-called exchange of ideas, two people together for a few months, the ideas are all exchanged. Two people really live together, how to spend time is a real problem, it needs some common emotions, common interests, common sustenance, and common troubles, two people to face it, solve it, unconsciously pass the day off, this is normal life, rather than sitting there face to face every day to exchange ideas.
Now two people can not be separated (unwilling to leave), and in the future will not be, because in the future, the common things of two people will only be less and less, and their needs for each other will be less and less, and even dispensable.
So in my opinion, this extramarital affair, even if it is unharmed, is still at the end of life.
Euthanasia should be its best ending.
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