After marriage, the biggest pain of living with your in-laws is that you will always feel like an outsider. When I first joined the work, I heard a story that the two colleagues had been in love for many years, and the parents of both sides had also been

After marriage, the biggest pain of living with your in-laws is that you will always feel like an outsider.

When I first joined the work, I heard a story, the two colleagues have been in love for many years, the parents of both sides have agreed to the marriage, and there is only one wedding away from marriage, but the girl suddenly proposed to break up, it is said that a training doctor launched a fierce pursuit to her, and the girl was shaken.

The pursuit of a doctor is only a fuse, and there have long been contradictions between girls and boys. The girl's parents are rural, the boy's home is urban, and after the relationship between the two is approved by both parents, the girl lives in the boy's home. Boys love girls very much, but girls always feel that at home, they are an outsider. Although the two are about to have a wedding, but the income of the two is not enough to buy a house for themselves, and the parents of both sides have no intention of paying them a down payment for the house, the girl is always afraid to live in that "home" for the rest of her life.

At that time, I was young and had little experience, and I only felt that the girl was wrong to propose a breakup because of the pursuit of a doctor, and I couldn't understand why the girl would make such a choice.

It wasn't until I gave birth to my baby myself and lived in my mother-in-law's house for a few months that I felt what it meant to "always feel like an outsider."

My husband and I bought our own house, but after giving birth, in order to facilitate the mother-in-law to take care of me and the baby (the mother-in-law has no job and wants to take care of the baby very much), the baby and I still went to the mother-in-law's house for a while. My mother-in-law took good care of me very carefully, changing patterns every day to make food, and helping me cut fruit every day, I am very grateful to my mother-in-law, but even so, I will have a lot of discomfort.

The biggest discomfort is "some enthusiasm you can't refuse", whether you want to drink soup or not, the mother-in-law will first serve a large bowl of meat every meal, and there is a full of meat, I am not good at rejecting the kindness of others, I can only drink silently; I said to my mother-in-law that I don't have to help me cut fruit, but every day at the end of the day, I will serve a plate; at night, the child makes a little noise, and the mother-in-law will immediately rush into the room, so that I have until now, the child will wake up immediately when he hums at night.

If you encounter a conflict with your in-laws, you can feel your husband's protection for his parents even more. During the confinement period, my relatives wanted to come to see me, and naturally, they called me instead of my in-laws, and I didn't think much of it and agreed to let them come to see me. But my husband had a fight with me over this matter, and he accused me of not consulting my in-laws before making a decision, this is the in-laws' home, not our home, and I should not allow others to visit without permission.

Another conflict was that when my son was at the 100th banquet, in order to arrange the venue, I had to play a lot of balloons, balloons I bought from the Internet, so I was sorting out how to combine balloons on my mobile phone, and my in-laws were practical and began to play balloons. My husband accused me of "picking easy things to do and directing his parents to do physical work", and had a big fight with me in front of my in-laws.

These two things made me truly realize that "the home of my in-laws and mother-in-law is not my own home, and my husband's parents are not my own parents, let alone treated as my own parents", and also strengthened my determination that even if I bring my own baby, I cannot live with my in-laws.

By now, the child is almost two years old, and I have been forced to become a full-time mother, but even if I work hard, I think about the discomfort before, think about the freedom now, and watch my husband and children have fun, I think it is worth it.