Text/Little Snow Mom
In the past few days, I believe that everyone has brushed such a video on the Internet, the daughter returns to her mother's home during the Spring Festival, and the big bag and small bag take things at home, and the father first said that there is no shortage of anything at home after seeing it, don't buy so many things.
Later, he quickly asked his daughter: "Did you buy something for your mother-in-law?" The daughter said indifferently: "My mother-in-law does not lack anything, so she did not buy anything." ”
At that time, my father was angry, "I don't lack anything, why did you buy something?" The daughter felt very wronged, so she replied: "Who goes back to her mother's house without anything!" ”
But the father was even more angry, and said bluntly: "Mother-in-law is also a mother, is it easy for your mother-in-law to show you a child all year round?" I can't let people say that the daughter I taught doesn't understand things, go back and buy it for your mother-in-law, you must buy it. ”
The father's attitude makes the daughter feel aggrieved, feel that he has not done anything wrong, but the father's idea is also correct, both sides are also old people, can not engage in differential treatment, and the mother-in-law at home is to take the child and help, do the children to be treated equally, to learn to be grateful, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law needs to be paid by both sides.
"They are all with babies, why is Grandma free and Grandma has a salary?"
Speaking of this topic, it is inevitable to talk about the elderly to help with the baby, nowadays many families are the elderly to help with children, some are grandma belts and some are grandma belts, but although they are with children, the treatment of the two is indeed somewhat different.
Like my cousin's family, at the beginning it was the child's grandmother to help take care of it, the cousin discussed with the husband, can not let their own mother and money and effort, each month to their own mother 2,000 yuan, counted as a daily family expenses, the child's grandmother in this way at home to help bring children for more than a year.
Later, when the cousin and brother were born, the old man went back to take his own grandson, and the younger two had to take the child's grandmother over. The cousin's husband discussed 2,000 yuan to his mother according to the same standard, and he did not think that the cousin was unwilling on the spot.
The cousin felt: "Your mother is a grandmother, my mother is a grandmother, can the grandchildren and grandchildren be the same?" Your mother with the child is a natural thing, the child and your family name, I give my mother a salary, that is to let my brother balance in his heart, what salary does your mother want! ”
The cousin-in-law is very uncomfortable in his heart, he feels that the cousin is very unreasonable, the elderly on both sides are old people, so discriminating, for the family harmony is a kind of destruction, will also affect the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
analyse:
The difference between grandma with a baby and a grandma with a baby is actually the same as the difference between the above for the mother-in-law and the in-laws to bring things, there is nothing that should be done or not, only that there is no equal treatment.
It can be said that the mother's family has raised itself, so after marriage, she is not often around her parents, buy more things to honor her parents, but if the mother-in-law is helping to take care of the children at home, and taking care of the family outside the home, the daughter-in-law thinks that it should be taken for granted, there is no reason, and it will only make the family contradiction more and more prominent.
No matter which side of the elderly, the children should be filial piety, especially the elderly have paid us, help us share, we naturally have to honor the elderly from time to time, parents have no obligation to manage us to the old for a lifetime, they just hurt us and want to help us share, but we can not treat the elderly as a "free nanny" to call.
Like now many are only children, the elderly on both sides are towards our family of three, can help to help, in the old man is willing to pay at the same time, we can not let the old man "chill", so as far as possible the two sides of the old man treated equally, whether it is to give money, or the New Year to bring things as far as possible a bowl of water flat, this is human so it is also reasonable.
What is needed for mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to get along is mutual understanding and dedication
Maybe someone was not convinced, the child is with your family name, your family should help, but you have to say carefully, the child does not follow the grandmother's surname, this kind of statement is unreasonable.
A family wants to live happily and harmoniously, in the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law issue, both sides must understand and pay, when parents understand the hardships of their children, children should also be grateful for the help of their parents, no one must unilaterally and unconditionally pay, even if there is and how long can it last?
People are mutual, you are good to me, I am good to you, you understand my difficulties, I respect your choice, otherwise all day long suspicion and mixing, this family will only live more and more chaotic, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will only get worse and worse.
Of course, all of this we hope to develop in a good direction, but the family has a difficult scripture, just hope that in a fair and just situation, we can treat the elderly on both sides reasonably, and do not chill the hearts of those who are helpful to you.
Interactive topic: Do you think it is natural for grandma to take the baby?
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