A rich man who runs a hospital and likes to speculate in bones, only to faint on the spot when he saw the stock market plummet. When he woke up, he was lying on the window of his hospital. By this time his family had arrived,

A rich man who runs a hospital and likes to speculate in bones, only to faint on the spot when he saw the stock market plummet. When he woke up, he was lying on the window of his hospital. By this time his family had arrived, gathered around the window, and asked him what was wrong, what did he want? The rich man who had just woken up weakly replied: I... I just want to... want...... Shanghai...... Rose! His wife slapped him in the face: Old thing, I already suspected that you and the head nurse had a leg!

2, a project and wife separated from each other, can only meet three or five times a year. But usually on the construction site every day with his wife online chat, one day, he was busy to get ready to go home, sitting on the train home on the Internet to ask his wife: Honey, how are you feeling now? His wife replied: My mood now is like meeting netizens.

3, the family traveled abroad, a flight sister saw that it was all foreigners, she sighed: "Wow! It's all foreigners!! As a result, a foreigner next to him said with a Chinese: "Please, now you are a foreigner, your whole family is a foreigner."

4, a sister paper told me today that she is unemployed. I asked, "Why dismiss you?" The sister replied, "They think I'm fat." I hugged my sister's paper: "This is discrimination, you can sue them, where do you work, what kind of work do you do?" Sister Paper: "I stepped on the back of the massage parlor." ”

5, a sister told me today that she is unemployed. I asked, "Why dismiss you?" The girl replied, "They think I'm fat." I hugged my sisters: "This is discrimination, you can sue them, where do you work, what kind of work do you do?" Sister: "I stepped on the back of the massage parlor!!! ”

6. One day, a barber beat up a sugar gourd seller, and went to the police station to ask the barber: Why did you beat the sugar gourd seller? The barber said: I'm going to be blown up, I'm burning my hair in the house, and he's shouting "hot paste" outside!

7, a small fly accidentally hit the spider web, the spider quickly came over to spit silk to wrap it, ready to make a good meal, but then flew a super large fly, shouted: "Little spider, what are you doing to my son?" The spider was startled, and when he saw that the big fly was about to break its cobwebs, he quickly sent the small fly: "Don't mess around, I saw that your son was not wearing clothes on a cold day, so I knitted a sweater for him to keep him warm." ”

8, before always do not understand, do not understand, so in the work always feel that the relationship with colleagues is bumpy, they feel very awkward. When you think about it for a moment, this is really a very sesame thing, but in ordinary life, I always feel disgusted with myself from time to time, making myself feel as if something is wrong and I don't know what it is. All in all, the relationship between work and colleagues, grasp the essence of the work, do not pull into personal grudges; get along with colleagues at work, look more at each other's advantages, learn more about each other's good places, as for the bad places, stay away, that is not the scope you should govern.

9, once I was alone at home, did not want to cook, but also slept past noon, is really hungry, I ordered two takeaways, not a family, the result of these two people outside the door actually met, I heard them in the house to ask each other: You are also for this family? You too? I opened the door to takeout, the two courier brothers saw that I was only one person and ordered two takeaways, that look was definitely adoration not disgust...

10, April Fool's Day to go to the buddy's house to play, I don't know who said a gas dew, we hurried to open the window to open the door, did not expect a second goods directly rushed into the bathroom to take out a wet towel on the nose, lying on the ground creeping forward, we all looked at him in horror, he stood up and said Happy April Fool's Day.

1 these two days turned cold, sleep without turning on the fan to sleep to cover the quilt to cover the window hula, as if suddenly autumn recently several colleagues in the office have a cold, I also nasal congestion, lying on the bed listening to the tide listened to more than an hour did not fall asleep This year the body seems to be worse than in previous years, either cough or cold, whenever this time will think "if there is someone around to accompany it" Alas, I hope that someone will let me make a fuss

12, Alipay Huabei opened after the quota of 5,000 yuan, I plan to buy a dress for my mother on Taobao. She saw a wide-sleeved flowing fairy dress, and I was going to click into it. But the internet speed is relatively slow, just stuck there, and the circle in the middle is non-stop. Then the mother said: Oh, it's so late that people close the door and go to bed, it's better to buy it tomorrow. When I heard this, my laughing waist couldn't stand up straight...

13, the nephew picked up a dollar in the balcony, happily showed it to me, let me save his small money bag for him, I took the money, casually put the coffee table on it, after a while the nephew ran over happily, said that he picked up another dollar in the living room, and also let me save a small money bag for him, I smiled and agreed, and threw the money on the table again! After a while, I heard my nephew shouting happily, and I picked up another dollar...

14, on the weekend to buy pants, I asked the boss: "Boss, how much are these pants?" Boss: "1500 pieces." I said, "Do you have a bank near you?" The boss whispered, "Yes, it's over there." I said, Then why the don't you grab it! ”