Author: Lemon [original content, welcome to personal collection forwarding]
Yesterday, the neighbor Aunt Qin came to my house to chat with my mother-in-law, and the two of them talked about Aunt Qin's "ignorant daughter-in-law". I heard Aunt Qin complain again: "My daughter-in-law doesn't cook at home, and she comes back after eating outside after work, do I still want to help her bring her baby?" He said as he hammered his own arm, which was sore all day because he was holding his grandson.
My mother-in-law listened to a sigh: "Hey, young people really can't say it now." All of us who are elders are offered as bodhisattvas, but we also blame you for raising your daughter-in-law too high, as if you owe her every day. You see my daughter-in-law, we are both like friends, I respect her, she also respects me, cares for each other, lifts each other up. Also, young people like to go out shopping, eat, party with friends or something, you don't always nag her, but also everywhere said, she listened to the natural unhappiness, after work do not want to go home, home naturally lazy to pay attention to you, lazy to hurt you. ”
Seeing that Aunt Qin was touched, my mother-in-law continued: "Also, don't hang on to your daughter-in-law with your baby all day, that grandson is yours, and it is nothing to be a grandmother." Moreover, that is also your son's child, not only to make your daughter-in-law grateful, but also to let your son know that it hurts you, and to take your daughter-in-law to thank you together. ”
To be honest, after listening to the chat between the two mothers-in-law, I really feel that my mother-in-law is more intelligent and more enlightened. If two generations live together, the elderly can do the following, then the daughter-in-law who is "ignorant" will also become sensible.
Keep your mouth shut and don't nag and say bad things about young people all day
It is undeniable that there are indeed such ignorant daughters-in-law. However, if the elderly lead by example as elders and first use their own words and deeds to influence young people, then young people will also respect the elderly and slowly change their hearts for a good daughter-in-law. Therefore, an old man like my neighbor Aunt Qin, who loves to nag and love to manage things, should actually learn to manage his mouth well, don't nag young people all day, and don't always say bad things about young people outside.
In fact, if the family has anything to say, it can be communicated in person at home. It's not a big deal, and it's best not to open your mouth to nag. If it's really a big problem and can't stand it, it is recommended to sit down and communicate well. If your family solves the problem behind closed doors, you don't have to let outsiders see jokes, and you don't have to let young people get angry because they hear old people say bad things about themselves from other people.
To be clear about right and wrong, don't always elbow to "inward", be more considerate of your daughter-in-law
In addition, from the fact that Aunt Qin always said "help her daughter-in-law with her baby", she felt that she was helping her daughter-in-law with her children, not helping her son, so she always complained that her daughter-in-law did not understand things and did not know gratitude. In fact, the child is also her son's, should help her son with the baby, should not put the responsibility of the baby on the daughter-in-law, feel that they help to take the baby is to help the daughter-in-law.
That is to say, as a mother-in-law, you must be clear about right and wrong, don't always elbow to "inward", and be more considerate of your daughter-in-law. For example, if you feel that your daughter-in-law does not cook at home and does not know how to feel sorry for the elderly, you can start with your son, urge your son to learn to cook and do housework, and accuse your son of not caring for his parents and ignoring family affairs. At the same time, it can also be said that the son and the daughter-in-law do housework together, educate the children, and emphasize that the family is two people, so that the daughter-in-law can understand the meaning no matter how stupid. In this way, you can also tell the little two that these things are what they should have done, and the old man just went to help.
Don't put your posture too low, and know how to guide your son and daughter-in-law to learn contentment and gratitude
As an old man, helping children, there is nothing wrong with hurting children, but you must not put your posture too low. You know, many "giant baby children" and "nibbling on the old people" are used to the old people. If the old man does not put his posture too low at the beginning, clearly telling his parents that raising his children has fulfilled his obligations, after they get married and start a family, their parents will no longer be their free nannies and no longer bear their living expenses, at most they can help.
Therefore, want to help with housework, with the baby, these are not parents should do, children have no right to ask parents to do this and that, and should not be critical of their parents' efforts and do not understand gratitude. Only by knowing how to guide sons and daughters-in-law to learn contentment and gratitude, the elderly will not be wronged when helping them with their babies, and the family can live in harmony.
Today's topic: Netizens, what do you think of Aunt Qin's complaint about her daughter-in-law?
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After becoming a mother, every day the mood is like riding a roller coaster. Just because of the child's naughtiness half dead, in the blink of an eye because of the child's warm words and moved to the end. To be a mother is to shuttle back and forth between anger and love... I hope to keep charging and be the "mother" that children want most in their hearts.
He has been engaged in children's book editing, children's famous book analysis, and has written interviews with entrepreneurs, pension directors, lawyers and other celebrities, and is now keen on parenting writing. Pay attention to [Lemon Fruit Parenting] Everyone learns together every day, makes progress together, warms each other, and shepherds babies on the clouds.
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