Low-level families like to keep "reasoning", while high-level families, dads will do 3 things

Author | Miss Muang Lai

Recently, I saw a news that made people can't help but be funny:

On Father's Day, a Jiangsu student sent a message to his father:

Dad I love you.

Father replied: It's unfortunate, I only love your mother.

Children crying and laughing must not post screenshots,

Sigh "plastic father-daughter love".

Unexpectedly, netizens have liked:

Parents have such a good relationship, you steal the fun!

Such an interaction is indeed a good thing.

Psychologist Kohut argues:

The parents' mode of getting along is the child's first impression of the world.

Dad loves Mom, Mom loves this home even more;

Mom is pampered and the family atmosphere is more positive.

As a result, the child can grow up in love.

As an adult, you will also become more mature and confident.

And "Daddy loves Mommy",

It is also the best education that children get.

Smart dads know how to give mom a holiday

I once watched a video:

The father went to his daughter's house as a guest,

The son-in-law played the game leisurely,

Daughter while calling to dock work,

While cleaning up the pile of toys and dirty clothes.

The father was full of remorse when he saw this.

once

The wife was so busy at home that he ignored it;

Now, the daughter has followed in the footsteps of her mother,

She became the "old mother" of the whole family.

If time can be turned back,

He wanted to tell his former self:

Give your wife a vacation and take on more housework on her own.

Why?

Because, the husband's attitude toward his wife,

Hide what the child will look like in the future.

The female writer Irie Whale once told a story.

On the subway,

A little boy runs very fast,

occupied a vacant seat,

Then he said to the mother next to him:

Mom come over, there's a location here!

Mom said:

You sit, and I stand with your dad.

But the boy said:

I'm a boy don't have to sit, Mom you sit.

After she sat down, her husband gave his son a look of approval.

In fact

The husband is on his way to work,

And the son and wife are going to go out and play.

When the husband got out of the car,

He also solemnly told his son:

You must take good care of my daughter-in-law,

Don't cry, don't mess with her.

That's my daughter-in-law, you know?

I'm going to make money for you!"

The boy patted his chest to assure,

The appearance of the little adult amused the whole car.

There is such a father who loves his wife,

How can a parent-child relationship be bad?

American writer Joan. Anderson argues:

Mom must have her own little vacation.

After all, endless efforts,

It's scary for yourself and others.

And no stress mom,

Emotions are regulated,

Be able to take better care of children,

Empathize with your child's feelings.

Your child's body and mind will be healthier.

So

Smart dads know how to give mom a holiday,

A woman who is cared for by her husband,

The heart is soft and stable,

Better at accepting and inclusive,

It also creates a warm family atmosphere.

Good dads know how to respect mom

Girlfriend and son go out to run errands,

I overheard my husband commenting in front of her children that "Mom is stupid".

The girlfriend was angry, returned home, and questioned her husband:

Why don't you respect her in front of your child?

The husband realized the seriousness of the problem and quickly apologized:

"I just said it casually, I didn't expect my son to remember."

"Any dissatisfaction with me,

You can mention it to me privately,

But it must not hurt my image in the child's heart. ”

There is a "Pygmalion's Law" in psychology:

People will unconsciously accept the influence and suggestions of others,

Especially people who like, admire, and trust.

When parents have disputes and cold wars,

Children can feel it.

A 75-year harvard study found that:

Fathers respect mothers,

When the child reaches adulthood,

Can feel more positive emotions,

Have a higher level of self-confidence and self-esteem.

This respect,

It's not just from gift-giving, holding hands,

Rather, it is to respect the personality of the wife from the bottom of the heart.

For example, respect your mother's feelings.

French men take pride in praising their mothers,

Merchants will write words such as "I am as beautiful as my mother" and "I love my mother" on children's products.

They're going to do it with action.

Calling on husbands to defend their wives,

A university in the United States spent three years studying 169 children aged 5-10.

The results of the study found:

In families where the relationship between husband and wife is not harmonious and the parents are easy to get along with and accuse,

Children are prone to illness and are also more likely to have psychological problems.

But the children raised by parents with cheerful personalities and relaxed family atmosphere,

Not only is it rare to get sick, but it is also not easy to be troubled by psychological problems.

Another example is respecting the mother's right to speak.

In a good education,

Partners don't tear down the stage in front of their children.

There is a contradiction in the parent-child relationship,

Dad is always on Mom's side,

Allow children to express anger,

But I don't blame my wife for the gesture.

When there is a dispute over education,

Will not tear down the stage in front of the child,

Instead, they communicate privately.

Let the child know that "the mother at home has the final say".

Invisibly reduces the burden of childcare,

It also makes the mother more confident and principled.

When education is unified into one voice,

Children will also be mentally healthier.

There is a "watch law" in psychology:

A person wears only one watch,

He can accurately grasp the time.

If you wear two watches, you will not be able to grasp the time.

The child can't figure out which side is right,

The sense of proportion in speaking and doing things is destroyed.

Professor Medina, a famous American brain scientist,

I once received a question from a father:

How can I get my son into Harvard?

Professor Medina said:

From now on, you go home and love your wife well.

Someone asked:

Why did you let that dad come home and hurt his wife?

Medina replied:

In the United States,

the best predictors of academic achievement,

It is the stability of family emotions.

And the stability of family emotions,

Most can be predicted by the wife's emotions.

What he meant was:

The wife is emotionally stable and the family atmosphere is warm;

Children grow up in a warm atmosphere, self-discipline and self-improvement,

Only by studying and concentrating can you pass the entrance examination to a prestigious school.

Successful fathers know how to accompany their children

Psychologists believe that:

Even more frightening than the absence of a father is the lack of paternal love.

Father rarely stayed at home, or never seriously accompanied,

Even if the mother is extremely responsible, the child has shortcomings in his heart.

A pediatrician discovered that his son made up sentences during the exam:

My dad always worked the night shift.

He asked the child bitterly and guiltily:

How did you come up with the idea of making this sentence?

The child answered:

Because you're not home every day, I can't see you.

Developmental psychologists believe that:

After the child is 6-8 years old, the importance of the father gradually increases.

The same sentence,

By Dad say it,

The impact on children is 50 times that of mothers.

Therefore, wise dads value companionship.

Accompany the boy,

Dad should often play games with him and cultivate qualities such as bravery and initiative;

Accompany the girl,

Dad should often praise her efforts and merits, and guide her to establish a sense of self-protection;

How?

Smoke 20 minutes before going to bed with your child,

Tell him a few bedtime stories;

Traveling on business and insisting on video chatting with children;

Bring gifts for your child when you go out and get home.

Every once in a while, I take my children on a trip.

No matter how busy I am at work, I will also take time out every week to cook for my children.

As long as you are careful, you can make your child feel:

Dad loves me, loves Mom, loves this home.

Love is a spiritual consolation that transcends form,

Moms will also feel warm when they see their fathers accompanying their children:

"I'm not the only one fighting over parenting."

There is a saying on the Internet:

The dad who will earn money is a mortal,

Dads who can cook are treasures,

Dads who can bring babies are scarce,

Dads who can express love are superb.

Dad expressed love from two sources.

On the one hand, behavior:

Be kind to your wife, respect your wife, and accompany your children;

Another aspect is the language:

Frequently praise your wife, encourage your children, and convey positive opinions to your family.

So, a good dad knows how to express love,

Let love flow in relationships,

Accumulate a source of happiness for the whole family.

This article,

It is worth recommending that dads collect,

May dads know how to love people,

May all mothers be well guarded.

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Author: Miss Mang Lai, a national second-level psychological counselor, senior male and female observers, has published "Girl, Live An Atmosphere Is Wonderful Enough". Some of the pictures are from the Internet, and the copyright belongs to the original author.