Wen | Cheats Jun
From ancient times to the present, there are many forms of singing the praises of the greatness of maternal love. The more poetic ones are "whoever says anything will repay the three Chunhui", the blunt one is "the woman is weak, the mother is strong", and the older generation often says "a good woman, benefit three generations".
Whether you admit it or not, the facts are in front of you. In a family, the sense of experience of a motherly woman can have a decisive influence on the family atmosphere.
On the other hand, the only criterion for judging the happiness of the family is actually the feeling of this woman.
So, is it that the more women pay, the better the family building, and the happier the whole family will be?
My next words may be a bit subversive. In a family, the harder the mother, the less happy the family may be.
◆ Why is it that the harder the mother works, the less happy the family may be?
Such "hardship" does not refer to how much labor the mother undertakes in the family from the perspective of outsiders, but the mother's own feelings.
Because it is also busy, some mothers will have a feeling of "hard work but worth it", and some mothers will have a particularly heavy sense of grievance and sacrifice in their hearts, and feel that their efforts cannot be exchanged for the same return.
An important premise is that the mother's feelings in the family can affect the whole family atmosphere. The mother, as the husband's wife, the mother of the child, naturally has a major influence on the whole family. Especially when the child is young, because the emotional connection with the mother will be more intimate, it is more psychologically affected by the mother's emotions.
Psychologically speaking, the relationship between husband and wife is the needle of the sea god in the family relationship, which is equivalent to the plant in the soil and the pot compared with the parent-child relationship. In the relationship between husband and wife, women's feelings will affect the entire husband and wife relationship, because women are sensual and delicate.
The mother who has worked hard for many years is likely not to have the support of family members
A harmonious and happy family must help and understand each other. If only the mother pays alone, then she is likely not to have the support of family members, whether materially or psychologically.
Take the most common group of full-time mothers, full-time mothers should be happy or unhappy, in fact, it has a lot to do with the support of their families.
Even if a person herself likes to teach her husband and children, but the family does not approve, always feel that she is eating idle food, enjoying happiness, and encountering any problems that she has to deal with herself, then, such a mother will be very hard in the family. Everything in the family was undoubtedly her own.
In this way, while her body is hard, she must add a layer of mental fatigue. Because the more you do, the more you go wrong. The consequence of being ignored by the family is that it is not their own credit to do a good job, but once there is a small difference, it must be asked by you.
The mother who always feels that she is working hard shows that she does not identify with her "pay", and her psychology will gradually become unbalanced
Taking care of children and families is always hard, and some mothers are tired but enjoy it, so she can get a sense of accomplishment from tedious family affairs and can draw spiritual strength from them. In this way, she will not feel very hard, at least not psychologically.
But if a mother doesn't love housework and has to work day in and day out to take care of the family, her sense of hard work will be strong. Moreover, in addition to hard work, I will also aggravate the sense of sacrifice, feeling that "I have to do everything alone."
In this psychological imbalance, her emotions are suppressed, and family members will be blamed at every turn. The whole family will be shrouded in a somber atmosphere, and the natural sense of happiness is not strong.
[Topic Discussion: Are you a hard mom? Do you feel your family is happy? 】
Senior nursery, psychological counselor. Understand the parenting and psychology, but also pay attention to the self-growth and family management of baoma, and strive to be the intimate person of mothers.
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