Zhang Xiaoxian said: "Good feelings are to see the whole world through a person, and bad feelings are because a person abandons the world." ”
If a person loves you, he will not bear to make you cry, but will stand in your point of view and let you feel the joy and beauty of life.
On the contrary, we need to think about whether this feeling is worth it.
On the Internet, seeing the marriage of Mr. Liu and Ms. Wang, even the emotional experts could not sit still, bluntly saying that the man was too utilitarian, and Ms. Wang was crying on the side, what did she experience?
01. Husbands are emotionally betrayed and publicly admit to "one-night stands"
Ms. Wang and her husband, Mr. Liu, met each other on a blind date, and after their marriage, they opened a factory, and the business became bigger and bigger.
In the eyes of many people, they are a happy couple, from no house to have a house, from a small high-rise to a villa, and 2 luxury cars, have long achieved wealth freedom, the only regret of the two is that they have no children, but with the advancement of science and technology, this problem has also been solved.
Ms. Wang finally became pregnant and became a mother through embryo transfer, but after becoming pregnant, she found that her husband had changed, returning home later and later, and traveling more and more frequently.
Once when her husband was taking a bath, she heard someone calling, and after connecting it was a woman's voice, and the other party was directly looking for Mr. Liu, which made her question.
Under her questioning, Mr. Liu did not deny it, saying that the other party was a female client of his own, and the two did have a little relationship, but it would never affect the marriage, and he had no intention of divorce.
Ms. Wang was very devastated, but Mr. Liu ignored her, took some items and left, and did not return all night.
After a period of time, Mr. Liu said that he broke off with the other party, Ms. Wang expressed disbelief, through the telephone inquiry, she found that her husband and a woman called more than 5 times a day, she has always thought that the feelings of husband and wife will be estranged because of the lack of children, how did not expect that she was pregnant, but the husband had someone else in his heart.
Ms. Wang has quarreled with her husband, and her husband swore to her that he would never betray the marriage again, but he turned around and did not pay attention to it, how to do it, his indifference, let the emotional experts feel angry, pointed out to the point: "You are a very utilitarian person, for your own business, do not hesitate to violate the principle of being a person, the heart does not know how to respect the wife, the face is too thick." ”
In this regard, Mr. Liu did not comment, but said another thing, the reason why he and his wife have a bad relationship is not because of women, but the two personalities are incompatible.
02. Men's desperation, women's can't put it down
Husband and wife run business together, men run business, and women manage finances, which is the standard of many enterprises.
Mr. Liu felt unfree, he gave an example, once he wanted to travel, need travel expenses of 2,000, the wife just did not want to give, but also said that there is no need to travel, let him be very annoyed, he considered the credibility of doing business, even if you can't get the business, at least you can't be a dishonest person.
But the wife does not understand himself, when he goes to work, he asks his wife to take a box for himself, the wife takes a relatively small size, in addition to sending samples, generally will give the customer a gift in the box, but the wife does not agree.
Mr. Liu feels that such a thing is very tiring to explain to his wife, in the end, his wife has a small heart, does not know how to be flexible, so he feels that it is an obstacle, for this reason, he proposed to let his wife return to the family, he can put the income to her account on time, but he does not want his wife to manage the finances anymore.
Ms. Wang's attitude is just the opposite, her husband's emotional betrayal has made her have a sense of crisis, she feels that if she quits the company again, she will be snubbed by her husband step by step, and in the end, she will get nothing.
Husband and wife, one desperate, one can not put down, it seems that the feelings have faded, in fact, also unveiled the cruel side of the marriage.
Many couples will also encounter such a situation, when they first got married, everything is just starting, they can tolerate and tolerate each other, with the development of their careers, one of them will progress fast, they will dislike the other person, and find ways to get rid of each other.
It's just that feelings are not a deal, tearing broken bones is still connected to the tendons, especially when two people have children, how can they be absolutely rational, and people who can calmly propose to clear the relationship are not rational, but thin feelings.
In Mr. Liu's view, all problems can be measured by interests, which is also the place where the emotional teacher criticizes, he and other women come together because the other party is conducive to their own business, let their wives go home, in order to expand the business, but ignored, if the husband and wife lack trust, there is no way to maintain feelings.
03. When you meet someone who doesn't love themselves, let it go
Someone on the Internet asked: "What should I do when I meet a desperate person?" ”
Below there was a high praise who replied: "Let it go!" ”
Admittedly, when a person doesn't love you, it doesn't matter how hard you try, because you can't wake up a person who is pretending to be asleep.
When Mr. Liu was mediating, he said something like this: "I only have 50% hope for marriage, that is to say, if I continue to go on, if I want to divorce, I don't care, even if my wife comes over and slaps me, I will not be angry, I am already like water." ”
Compared with Ms. Wang, who was crying on the side, Mr. Liu behaved very rationally.
But the discerning person can find that his rationality is precisely a manifestation of a rogue, because your indifferent appearance has already shown that you do not want to take on the responsibility of marriage, and his heart has shifted elsewhere.
In Mr. Liu's view, even if the divorce will not affect him, he has already thought of a way out, so marriage has become a unilateral concern for Ms. Wang.
We know that love is a two-way journey, and if one person loses enthusiasm, no matter how hard another person tries, it is not long-term.
Ms. Wang is like this, she is more and more humble in the marriage, promised to quit the company, can not check her husband's current account, or even do not interfere with her husband's freedom, but the more humble she is, the more her husband looks down on her.
Humility cannot be exchanged for love, and it will only plunge yourself into a deeper predicament.
Although in marriage mediation, most of them are persuaded and not persuaded, but still want to say the truth to Ms. Wang, break up, let go of a person who is not suitable for themselves, and also let their second half of life get peace.
You really don't need to be in a humble corner for the sake of each other, let yourself be emotionally depressed, life is not fun, learn to let go, you can focus on your own life, accompany your children to grow, let the body stay healthy, these are the most important assets in life.
Life is a process of continuous self-growth, sometimes it hurts, but only when you uncover the scars can you make the wounds scabb and slowly become armor to protect yourself.
Give a thumbs up to Ms. Wang! Do you think women should let go of loveless marriages?