In the Song Dynasty Lin Kui's "Records of Provincial Hearts", there is a saying: "Those who are harmonious within are prosperous in their families, and those who are harmonious outside are prosperous in their affairs." ”
If a family wants to prosper, it needs all its relatives to work together, not selfish, not indifferent, clear and bounded.
I once heard the saying that the measure of a man's success is, just one point, whether he can maintain his own family well.
At first, I didn't understand it, didn't we all say that men's success is success? As I grew older, especially with my own marriage, I gradually understood the deep meaning of this sentence.
In the past, we all thought that family affection was very noble, but in front of real life, you will gradually find that some family affection is also very cheap.
I saw an old post on the Internet, but I had a new feeling, which was about:
The owner said that his father's old house was demolished and received 2.76 million yuan in demolition money. However, the money in her hand was not yet hot, and the people of the seven aunts and eight aunts gathered in her house from all directions.
Her uncle has always been very respected, and this time the uncle is also sitting in a precarious position, saying that he will give a meeting to the father of the lord. The content of the meeting is that the 2.76 million can be divided among the adherents, and the other 760,000 can be distributed to the uncle's son. The reason is that the cousin is the only male in the family.
The uncle's tone was unmistakable, and he had obviously been supported by his aunt and uncle who had come to help.
What they mean is that this little girl is a foreigner and does not deserve the money. The cousin is the male of the family, who wants to pass on the generations. And they stopped this money, but they did not let the fat water flow out and stop the loss in time.
The father of the Lord was an honest man who attached great importance to the kinship and family of the hands and siblings. Seeing his father's embarrassment, the poster took out a piece of paper from the drawer and handed it to the uncle.
This is the father's stomach cancer diagnosis certificate, the owner said that if the cousin can bear the father's medical expenses with me, and accompany and take care of the father's daily life, and the future pension (the doctor said there is hope for a cure), the last remaining money is willing to share with the cousin.
What made the owner of the post cold was that these uncles and relatives did not even have the courage to inquire about their father's condition, treatment, and affection, so they hurried away.
After people reach a certain age, they will find that a lot of family affection has become weak, which is not intentional, but many people really don't deserve it.
We don't have to blame ourselves for this, and we don't have to feel selfish. Everyone's life is not easy, first have the ability to improve their own living conditions, let themselves live happily is the most realistic.
The meaning of the existence of family affection is to help each other and run together to a better life. And blindly pulling down to fulfill the affection of others is a terrible whirlpool, not a real affection.
Many people feel that once they come to this world, there are only a few important people in their lives. Parents, relatives, brothers and sisters are related to themselves and have an emotional basis, and they cannot be separated.
But sometimes, the more relatives you are, the easier it is to hurt each other. Most family conflicts occur after they have established their own families.
When your brothers and sisters each have their own small family, they will begin to make calculations for their own small family, everyone becomes realistic, and the family relationship will be weak.
When there is a financial dispute between each other, some of which may also involve the unprincipled bias of the parents, it is easy to cause estrangement between brothers and sisters.
No matter how deep the blood and affection, they can't stand the coldness of people's hearts. When people reach middle age, who is not resisting the pressure of life, and who does not have a large family behind them?
For people like Uncle Thesis, we can't help but ask: In the flesh and blood affection, how can you take advantage of everything, and why should others fulfill you?
When calculations come and go, people's hearts are cold, and family affection is scattered.
Relatives are implicated by the word "love", so they will make appropriate concessions or be soft-hearted. But when you are indifferent in everything, take advantage of everything, and chill the hearts of others, this family affection is long gone.
Looking at the above post, the father of the post owner actually had a shaken heart in the end. This is actually very frightening, one is to imply that the father of the poster has always been an "exploited person", and the other is to show that the father of the poster has been brainwashed by the so-called affection.
If the head of a family, adhering to such a mentality, to weigh the pros and cons between the original family and his own small family, family affection, then who marries this man is a very sad thing.
The feelings between relatives are very delicate, just as the father, daughter, mother and child will gradually drift apart, and this is especially true between relatives.
We live in a world where, as life grows, we have to constantly switch in relationships and roles. It is important that you know how to adapt to your role in a timely manner in order to take on the corresponding responsibilities.
The fate between brothers and sisters is worth cherishing, and it is also worth maintaining and operating with true feelings. But only if it's worth it.
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The world is so big, thank you, you can see me!
[Wen | Wei Wei'an: the pen has temperature, for the voice of emotion, an atypical writer who loves words, invites you to perceive life together]