How important a woman's PU is, just look at the rich melon in Hong Kong

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New Year's relatives

New Year to deal with the seven aunts and eight aunts,

Do you have any tips?

After a hard year, I was the happiest to go home for the New Year! It's just that I'm most afraid of the sudden "concern" of the seven aunts and eight aunts: asking about income, marriage, children...

Smart girl come to support, how do you skillfully deal with the excess curiosity, excessive concern, and privacy issues of your relatives?

What wonderful words do you want to share with other fairies?

Or how did you get the upper hand in previous years?

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*Title source: Question 1 of this issue of Micro-Q&A

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Question 1

(Source of the title of this issue)

Keywords: parenting investment 

Father, 57 years old, cloth, not alone, cadre of organs in fourth-tier cities (father's father and brother are both), 2 commercial houses in fourth-tier cities, 1 self-built house and 1 car; 

mother, 54 years old, Shibu, not alone, primary school teacher turned sales, no house and no car debt of 100,000 yuan; 

Father girlfriend, 53 years old, cloth cutting, no house and no car, supermarket cashier. Divorced at an early age, he raised his son alone, and his son is currently 25 years old and unmarried. 

My only daughter was raised by my father, my parents lived apart for many years, and when I was 24, my mother left the house, and my father and girlfriend had lived together before the divorce. 

Currently confused: 

My father intended to get a license with his girlfriend, but the elders of the family objected because the woman was too tight on money, and I also said that it was risky to get a license, and my father said to consider it again. 

In the marriage of my parents, the younger generation should not interfere too much, but when I started a business smoothly, I gave my father a full BMW car (my girlfriend was already there, and the car was taken by my father to my girlfriend's son)

Later, I started a business and was depressed, my father did not pay to help me, and my aunt blamed my father for caring about me and actively letting her son meet with the elders of the family to build a relationship, while my mother left the house and did not fight for me.

I now have low income during pregnancy, no car, no house, no sense of security, I don't know what kind of mentality and action should I use to face the risk of parental investment diversification?

I hope to get the guidance of Sister Wa, and wish Sister Wajie an early third child and family harmony.

answer

Your mother's "elementary school teacher resold 100,000 yuan without a house and no car", which is indeed something that Shibu will do. Your dad is so good to his girlfriend, so active to give his girlfriend a long-term choice, to invest in parenthood, it shows that what your girlfriend does is most likely the opposite of your mother, making your father very satisfied.

Since this is the case, then she can indeed get the corresponding return, no matter how sad you are, it is difficult to change this result.

Some time ago, Hong Kong's rich man Liu Xxiong held a press conference, and from his attitude towards Lu Xujun and Gan X, it is obvious that if a woman's PU is low, this blessing should be on the child; If a woman has a high PU, the child will not get much pro-investment.

So why do you say that some women can "do"? For example, when Lu Xjun and Da Liu are together, they can play casually, on the contrary, Gan X has always been self-denying and maintaining a cautious attitude. This is equivalent to one person squandering and the other saving a lot of money. What the former squanders may have to be paid back by children, and what the latter accumulates is the blessing of future generations.

So back to your question, your mother consumed your share of blessings, and although I don't know what she did before, since it has already happened, then what you do now is useless.

It's like having two faucets in a pool, you are the tap that enters the water, and your mother is the faucet that puts the water. Your mother's faucet has been left on all day, and the water in the pool has been drained, and relying on your incoming faucet to open for more than an hour, there will not be much water in the pool. My advice to you is that instead of relying on your mother, you should hold on to your husband's house.

For you, this may also remind you that you should always remember not to consume the blessings of your offspring like your mother, to strive to get rid of the fate given by your native family, and to stand up to make good fortunes for yourself and your descendants. Go for it.

Question 2

Keyword: marriage 

Dear doll, I usually read the tweets of the public account, and I feel that there are a lot of dry goods in the Q&A. You give rational and point-to-the-head comments on everyone's confusion, rather than just saying nice things or talking in generalities. So today I also want to try my luck, it would be great if I could be drawn, my problem is a little special, I hope I don't dislike me, and I don't mind making a negative typical ha. 

I am 36 years old this year, 170 cm tall, 120 pounds, average appearance, undergraduate, second-tier city clerk, monthly income of 3,000 yuan, only daughter, parents have a house, so I live in my parents' house, I am a proletariat without a car and no house, but fortunately, life is thrifty than my peers, usually do financial management, daily living expenses are removed, the most is to buy idle books, occasionally travel, life is still passable.

My confusion right now is: Am I getting married?

The reason for this confusion is that I really have no desire to get married, maybe there are no successful examples around, and I am even afraid of love and marriage. I am still at this age, and it is really not the reason why it is not high or low, but that I have not thought about marriage at all.

However, friends and parents around me told me that in the future, when there is pain or change, there may be no way to support independently. In addition, when my parents are old, it is difficult to say whether I can take care of me independently. These are realistic, and I think it makes sense.

So I was thinking, is it really going to get married? What kind of people do I choose to have the possibility of success? Or where else do I need to work on? Thank you

answer

You are 36 years old, live with your parents, live a stable and comfortable life, and "have never wanted to get married", then you might as well imagine your future life.

For example, after ten years, parents are getting older, the body is inevitably suffering from various diseases, you have to work alone, but also take care of two elderly people at the same time, all day and year, no one can give you a hand.

For example, twenty years later, your parents may have passed away one after another, leaving you alone. Even if you still have friends, they will only contact you occasionally, after all, your peers basically have their own families, and some are even starting to bring grandchildren.

When you are alone, if you encounter a home lockdown (maybe there will be any new love in the future), you have to face it alone day and night, in addition to watching TV is playing with mobile phones, you don't even have a talking partner, day after day, you will feel boundless loneliness; When you have an uncomfortable body, no one can take care of you, when you lie uncomfortable in bed, wanting to drink a glass of water is a luxury, if you faint in a serious way, the consequences are even more unimaginable.

For example, in thirty or forty years, you can search for "old people living alone", and that is the situation you will face.

All of these listed above are very real difficulties, and they are the difficulties that you will most likely encounter, and there is no way to hide. But if you are married, run well, and have a partner who shares happiness and suffering, then you can avoid these difficulties, or even if you encounter difficulties, you can minimize the pain, and have someone to accompany you to help you through it. In other words, getting married is actually equivalent to buying an insurance for your future to ensure that your future is more stable.

If you insist that you don't mind dying alone, then let's logically talk about whether marriage is good or not.

Is it harder for you to get married now, or is it harder not to get married? That must be harder to get married, right? After all, if you want to not get married, you can continue to lie down easily, but "36 years old, 170 cm tall, 120 pounds, average appearance... Monthly income of 3000 yuan... The proletariat without a car and no house" is not easy to find a suitable marriage partner.

In that case, is it better for us to keep doing simple things, or is it better for us to work hard to do more difficult things?

You can recall our school experience from childhood to adulthood, in most cases, excellent students who study hard will have more prospects and better life after work; And the lazy and playful poor students will be exhausted to make a living after entering society. That is to say, endure the hardships of more than ten years of study, and exchange for a rich life in the future; If you are greedy for fun and refuse to eat the hardships of learning, you will have to suffer the hardships of a lifetime of life in the future.

Speaking of you, if you have been letting yourself lie in your comfort zone when you are young, lying flat and not getting married, what awaits you will most likely be a lonely and miserable old age.

If you change your mind and want to get married, "What kind of person do you have to choose to have the possibility of success?" ”

Not long ago, I looked at a public account, there was a girl with similar conditions to you, she finally found a 60+ old man, this old man is a demolition household, gave the girl a lot of money. If you really don't have a good choice, you can also try this road, find an object that is many years older than yourself, the other party's children are basically already a family, you don't have the pressure of being a stepmother, and you can also harvest his large pro-investment;

If you can't accept such a big age difference, you can also find a 50+ uncle, just be prepared to be a stepmother;

Or you can go to the countryside to find a son-in-law and live with you in your parents' house, he has no money, but he can contribute, and is willing to be good to you and your parents.

The above three are about the possibility of you succeeding in getting a long-term choice, which may be unexpected to you, and may be difficult for you to accept for a while, but this is the reality. If it was ten years earlier, five years earlier, even three years earlier, your mate choice situation would be different, but now, there are only these few possibilities, which is the price to pay for so many years.

Of course, you can refuse and continue to live alone, just be prepared to face the difficulties I mentioned at the beginning. All I can say is good luck.

Old fans advanced

Question 3

Keywords: second child surname 

Dear baby sister, hello, thank you for having you, let me harvest an excellent husband and a happy life.

I am 160cm, 52kg (currently pregnant with the second child for more than 7 months), non-only student, undergraduate, primary school teacher;

Husband 180cm, 75kg, only student, graduate student, company employee. At the age of 29, they gave each other their first love in college, and they gave each other for the first time, and they had a son who was more than three years old. Choose two out of three, and ask full marks for five questions before marriage.

Our mode of getting along is:

1. Financially, my husband is responsible for all the expenses of the family, give me more money, my money is arranged by myself, and my in-laws sometimes sponsor some.

2. In life, my husband takes care of all the housework, and I occasionally sort out the items.

3. In terms of relationship, my husband loves me very much, and sometimes I don't have a good temper.

4. In parenting, my husband is a little doting on the baby, but most of them will listen to my parenting methods.

My husband is fit, loves to watch game videos, wants to buy a motorcycle, and feels a tendency to cut; I read books and occasionally play the piano and draw (very amateur, but versatile in the eyes of my in-laws).

I am really grateful for my current life, but I am sincerely afraid, so I have the following appeal:

1. My in-laws asked my husband to discuss with me about Erbao and my mother-in-law's surname (my father-in-law is a son-in-law, but my husband still has my father-in-law's surname), I don't agree, I think our children must have a surname with my husband. Will it lay a mine for the future relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law?

2. Which part does it need to be adjusted?

3. What do I need to pay special attention to in my future relationship?

Concealment with a license. Whether you win the lottery or not, I wish Sister Wa and the little sisters of the team a happy day!

answer

Let's look at your questions one by one.

First, regarding the surname of the second child, you said "I think our children must have a surname with their husband", which is correct, your husband does not have a mother-in-law's surname, why should your child have a mother-in-law's surname. Therefore, if you insist that the second child and the husband's surname are good, explain it and say that if the surname of Dabao Erbao is different, it is easy to suffer gossip outside, and it is not good for the child. Unless the husband changes his surname to his mother-in-law, the two children will change their surnames together.

Second, about which part needs to be adjusted. You have small eyes with single eyelids, a flat nose, and high cheekbones, strictly speaking, you need both ocular synthesis and nasal synthesis. However, at present, whether you adjust or not has little impact on your relationship, so you can not adjust it, and as an elementary school teacher, it is normal and not contrary to you.

Third, precautions for getting along in the future.

First of all, in the description you mentioned that "in terms of relationship, my husband loves me very much, sometimes I don't have a good temper", from the photo, you are indeed a bad temper, you can start by improving the bad temper. Every time you get angry, irritable and want to lose your temper, think about all the good treatment you have received, and remember that you will not die if you don't die.

Secondly, you said that "economically, my husband is responsible for all the expenses of the family, give me more money", "In life, my husband takes care of all the housework", "In terms of relationship, my husband cherishes me very much", in short, your husband has made cloth, stones, and cuts, which can be described as a model husband of three good, I hope you can also quickly stand up, enhance the sense of crisis, and stop continuing to sit and enjoy the fruits of your husband's efforts with peace of mind.

Not to mention that you go to compete or provide emotional value for your husband, after all, these two will be difficult for you to do for a while, but at least you should take the initiative to take more part of the housework, and the cooking should strive to improve to a higher level.

Your relationship doesn't seem to be a big problem at the moment, but if you don't work hard to improve now and don't take the initiative to find some hardships, then after five years, your marriage is likely to have hidden dangers.

Question 4

Keyword: mate selection 

The conditions are good, because of low self-esteem, I took the initiative to break up. Later, another person who looked like an average income was okay for 5 years, because he was in debt and his family couldn't help at all, and he broke up because he felt hopeless. It is also related to my delay in advancing into marriage.

I am 32 years old, with a monthly income of about 20,000, a house and no car, and now working abroad.

My appeal is, how do I recognize myself, what kind of girl should I find for me. I was particularly confused, since I was a child, my parents' fighting violence made me have a lot of disgust for marriage, do I have to die alone. It's good to be worried and feel free and rich. I don't know what to do.

answer

You have pink hair, a comb, a silver chain on your hand, a photo T-shirt with sunglasses pinned to it, dressed so trendy, and do nail art, which girl dares to be with you? Aside from your dress, look at your appearance, and quite handsome, a bit like Wu Jing when he was young.

You also said that you will not take the initiative to chase girls, and on the whole, you are like a stone clipper with bad family conditions. It's hard for a guy like you to find a partner. Because most stone clippers are relatively harmonious and stable in their homes, and the original family is harmonious and stable, they are difficult to find objects, not to mention that there is a short version of stone clippers in your family.

You see that Wang Xfei's mood is so unstable, Zhang YY mentioned that he is all disgusted, if it is a Wang Xfei from a bad family, with the eyes of the scissors above the top, there is no way to find an object. Wang Xfei is at least dressed quite appropriately now, not like you who is fancy from head to toe.

If you want to choose a mate, now you can only rely on luck. There may be some girls who have a black history, you can accept it, she knows Entu, you may be able to deal with it.

All in all, broaden your circle and increase your social surface, especially with spiritual communication and spiritual collision as the main content, more circles for girls can improve your chances of finding your other half.

Knowledge Planet Pico Quiz Questions

01

Keywords: Rock-cutting man 

Hello baby sister and marriage master fairies~ Facing the stone scissor man said: "The little sister who just walked over is so good-looking, quack heart", this sentence I want to think of the side to reflect the woman's own lack of MV, but also want to know how the boy should reply to this sentence. Thank you fairies great~

answer

I've never seen a rock-scissor man like this in my life.

02

Keyword: low sound 

Good afternoon dear baby sisters and marriage masters, there is a question that has been bothering me for a long time, and I hope it will be answered ❤️. My husband is a very introverted person, he speaks very little, his voice is still very small, and he can't hear him clearly in the normal range, but he himself doesn't feel that if I don't hear clearly, he will not be happy and will not say it again. This situation has to be played out every day, and I am so tired that I want to ask if there is any good way?

answer

Generally speaking, people with heavy cloth sex such as my small ball ears are not sensitive, and people with heavy shear sex such as my pearl ears are particularly pointy. It may not be his homework, it's your homework.