Text: Zheng Shaoyuan wishes that my words can warm you
-01-
Teacher Tu Lei, an emotional expert, once described marriage like this:
Respect and freedom is the most basic rule of handling the marriage relationship, no matter how deep the love between husband and wife, do not ignore these two principles, otherwise the deepest love will be exhausted, there is no love without respect, there is no love without freedom, if you want to make the marriage long, we must keep these two basic bottom lines.
In fact, in a marriage relationship, the feelings of both husband and wife are rarely equal, and everyone yearns for a love that is evenly matched, but unfortunately, everyone can meet.
The balance in the relationship is often tilted, and more often women pay more, although the emphasis on independence, but women are more concerned about the family than men, naturally also stemming from the cultural influence of so many years.
Although you say that you do these things because you are willing, if your husband takes everything you do for granted and still can't accept it emotionally, you will still feel that your feelings are wrong.
Marriage, some say it's beautiful, some say it's ugly. People who run successful marriages praise it, and people who fail to run marriages curse it. After entering the marriage, people began to carefully manage their marriages in the besieged city that decided the second half of their lives.
-02-
Regarding love, there is a hot comment on the NetEase cloud: "You think you are married to love, in fact, people are just poor and do not choose a wife, and it costs the least money to marry you." This sentence largely summarizes the mentality of the poor boy or the phoenix man marrying his wife, people are poor, there are few choices, so he marries you, but there is no choice, but you have use value. This statement is very heartfelt, but it is an objective fact. Sun Tuo is a poor boy and phoenix man with such logic.
Sun Tuo was born in a poor family in the countryside, he also has 3 sisters above, seeing here, we can actually realize. Sun Tuo's family is not only poor, but his parents also prefer sons to daughters. With such parents and such family education, Although Sun Tuo's original family has poor economic conditions, he has not suffered any hardships.
Not only in life, all the good things in the family came to him first, and as a man, he never worked in the ground. In terms of study and education, even if several sisters are better than his academic performance, they still do not continue to study after graduating from junior high school, but go to work to earn money. The monthly salary, in addition to the necessary living expenses, the rest is sent back to Sun Tuo's younger brother.
Speaking of which, Sun Tuo is still grateful for the efforts of his parents and several sisters.
-03-
For the original family, he is indeed not a white-eyed wolf. Like most phoenix men, he took these favors to heart and vowed that he would be rewarded with a show. Sun Tuo did not live up to the hopes of his family, he was admitted to a prestigious university, and after graduation, he entered a large company with his own results.
When Jiang Yi had just graduated from college, she found a job. It was at this company that she met Sun Tuo.
At that time, Sun Tuo had been working for two years, he was three years older than Jiang Yi, and he was considered Tonai's predecessor.
The fledgling Jiang Yi has a lot of things she doesn't understand at work, and Sun Tuo takes good care of her and often teaches her. Jiang Yi grew up quickly under his care, so she was very grateful to him.
Sun Tuo has good ability and is often appreciated by his boss, and Jiang Yi also admires him. A man who takes good care of himself, has good ability, and is not bad looking, Jiang Yi quickly likes him.
Later, she heard other colleagues tell her that Sun Tuo's family was not well-off, that his hometown was rural, and that he had no house or car. Tell Jiang Yi to think clearly.
-04-
At that time, Jiang Yi was already deeply in love with Sun Tuo, and these material conditions mentioned by her colleagues were nothing in her eyes. She felt that as long as two people worked together, they would definitely change their lives.
When the two people discussed marriage, Sun Tuo put forward his request, saying that he wanted the AA system after marriage. Jiang Yi did not agree at first, but Sun Tuo insisted, saying that it would be good for everyone and would not quarrel over the problem of money. Jiang Yi could not convince him, so he had to agree.
The two men made a down payment for the house, sun Tuo's parents borrowed a lot of money from him outside, and the two got married.
After marriage, two people really live according to the AA system of marriage, the mortgage is divided equally between the two people, and the cost of living is the same. Jiang Yi felt that this was just a whim of Sun Tuo, which would change later.
However, unexpectedly, after four years of marriage, the two people have always been AA marriages, during which Jiang Yi proposed many times to end this way, but they were rejected by Sun Tuo.
Because Sun Tuo earned more than Jiang Yi, his careful thinking was that after the AA system, his remaining money could be used to subsidize his parents and siblings in a fair way. Otherwise, Jiang Yi would definitely oppose him subsidizing the original family.
With such a calculated idea, Sun Tuo insisted on AA marriage, and no matter how Jiang Yi objected, he was not moved.
-05-
A year after marriage, Jiang Yi's mother suddenly had a car accident, and she took out all her savings and still wasn't enough. Jiang Yi wanted to borrow some money from Sun Tuo, the kind that made an IOU. Sun Tuo said: "I'm sorry, we said that the AA system is good, and your mother's business has nothing to do with me." ”
At that moment, Jiang Yi really wanted to get a divorce. At this moment, Jiang Yi found out that she was pregnant.
Jiang Yi survived the most difficult days, and even when she was pregnant, she did not relax herself, and identified making money as the most worthwhile thing to do at the moment. Jiang Yi believes that feng shui takes turns, and sooner or later, the injuries she once suffered will definitely return to Sun Tuo.
The scope of the AA system includes everything in the family, even the child's milk powder money, toys, diapers, etc., to tell the truth, Jiang Yi is particularly speechless. However, this man was chosen by herself, and who could she complain about?
When his mother-in-law was sick and hospitalized, Sun Tuo asked Jiang Yi to serve, and Jiang Yi said: "When my mother was sick, you didn't serve for a day, so why did your mother get sick, and I had to saddle up before and after the horse?" You think too much. ”
Sun Tuo knew that he didn't pay attention, and when he said those words to Jiang Yi, he didn't think that he would encounter a similar situation. After the mother-in-law was discharged from the hospital, she was paralyzed, and Jiang Yi acted as if she did not know. As long as it is about the mother-in-law, sun Tuo must do it himself. The couple's feelings are also getting weaker and weaker.
-06-
Jiang Yi's work ability is very strong, and she has slowly been promoted and raised in recent years, and her income has gradually caught up with Sun Tuo. Moreover, Jiang Yi's original family is also much stronger than Sun Tuo, and her parents often give her some money, and she has secretly saved it.
Just some time ago, Jiang Yi talked about the next project, and the company gave her a large bonus. Coupled with the money she had saved over the years, she was ready to change her father's car.
The new car was quickly bought, and Jiang Yi led her parents to pick up the car. My father was very happy, and although he complained that she had spent money indiscriminately, he could see that he was still very happy.
After this matter was known to Sun Tuo, he was both angry and jealous. Over the years, his money has been subsidized to his parents and siblings, and he has no savings in his hands. Seeing that Jiang Yi actually bought a car for his father-in-law, and he was still taking the bus, his heart was unbalanced.
Sun Tuo found Jiang Yi and asked: Where did you get so much money to buy a car for your father? Are you hiding something from me? Besides, our family doesn't have a car yet, why don't you buy it for our family and buy it for your parents?
Jiang Yi felt that he was making a fuss without reason: You proposed the AA system marriage yourself, the rest of the money I want to spend as much as I want, I have saved a lot of money over the years, what is wrong with buying a car for my father? Can we buy a car? Let's AA.
Sun Tuo was choked by Jiang Yi's words, and couldn't help but be annoyed and angry: I am still riding the subway, how dare you buy a car for your father? I'll kill you!
-07-
The couple quarreled without a word, and finally Sun Tuo actually gave Jiang Yi a slap. This slap also broke up the marriage of the two people. Jiang Yi packed up her things and went back to her mother's house, leaving a sentence before leaving: I want to divorce you, you phoenix man!
Jiang Yi's mother was overjoyed to hear that her daughter was divorcing this phoenix man. Immediately contacted a blind date to give Jiang Yi an acquaintance.
These days, Jiang Yi and this blind date have met several times, and they feel that each other is not bad. The two people decided to get married, and they waited to divorce Sun Tuo before getting married.
At first, Sun Tuo felt that he had eaten Jiang Yi, so he waited for her to come back and apologize to himself, but after waiting for more than a month, Jiang Yi still did not come back, he could not hold back, so he went to the door to find Jiang Yi. Only to find that he was waiting for him was a divorce agreement, and his home had a new man.
Sun Tuo's mentality collapsed on the spot, and he did not expect that Jiang Yi would really divorce himself. He knelt down and wept bitterly, begging Jiang Yi to forgive him, but how could Jiang Yi agree?
Marriage should be a husband and wife supporting each other, understanding each other, and going through a lifetime together; but the phoenix man calculates the other half because of selfishness, which is doomed to lead to the failure of the marriage. I hope you can take this as a warning.
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