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In the relationship between the elder and the son and daughter-in-law, many elders feel that they should be the leading person, and the son and daughter-in-law should adopt an attitude of obedience and implementation of their own experience and opinions. However, for many couples, the opinions of the elders can only be used as a reference, because sometimes they do not conform to the mainstream of the current era.
In such a difference, many elders will be angry, and even choose not to pay attention to their sons and daughters-in-law, and sometimes even if the sons and daughters-in-law show kindness, they will try to avoid, because in their subconscious, they will feel that their sons and daughters-in-law will suffer one day if they do not listen to their own words, but when things slowly develop, the reality is not as they think.
At this time, even if these elders have something to ask for, the son and daughter-in-law will also have some difficulties, after all, no matter in what kind of relationship, we need to sincerely consider each other to obtain each other's sincerity, if it is just as selfish as ever, from their own point of view to consider the problem, it is actually not good for each other, even parents and children.
Today's story comes from the sharing of netizen Liu Tian.
A mother-in-law who is content with the status quo
At that time, when Liu Tian and Zheng Yang were married, the two people agreed not to stay in their hometown, but to go to the provincial capital city to develop, because Liu Tian and Zheng Yangxue's majors would have better development prospects in large companies, and this was also for their future considerations.
However, the in-laws at that time strongly opposed it, because they felt that this was simply nonsense, saying that it was to go to the big city to develop, in fact, in the big city to suffer more, it was better to stay in the hometown, although it could not earn much money a month, but at least it was stable.
The mother-in-law's mentality of only knowing the status quo made Liu Tian very speechless, but fortunately, Zheng Yang was still more supportive of her, so in the second year of their marriage, they saved a sum of money to settle in a big city.
And when the two people left, the in-laws were still a look of disapproval, especially the mother-in-law, and also specially pulled Liu Tian into the room and said to her, "I don't know why you have to toss so much, but I also explained the words to you clearly, you have to take my son to what big city to develop, then don't blame our old two for not giving you a little help, after all, we still have to retire, but also take care of our young son." ”
The mother-in-law's words made Liu Tian have some chills, but Liu Tian also chose to understand at that time, but as a daughter-in-law, Liu Tian has not received any favor from her in-laws in the past year, so Liu Tian also said the same thing to her mother-in-law, that is, since her mother-in-law is not willing to help them, then she will not do much filial piety to her in-laws in the future, after all, between her daughter-in-law and her in-laws, there is more or less one for one, so I hope that the mother-in-law will not blame herself.
At that time, the mother-in-law was also very backbone, agreed to Liu Tian's condition, and said that she did not need Liu Tian to give herself a pension in the future, and had her own young son and daughter-in-law.
Liu Tian heard this and laughed a little, after all, the little uncle is not yet married, and the mother-in-law is already worried, but since the mother-in-law herself is willing, then Liu Tian is also happy to be close and comfortable.
After talking to her mother-in-law about these things, Liu Tian also said what her mother-in-law meant with Zheng Yang, and Zheng Yang also said that Liu Tian was right, and also said that in the future, when her parents have something, she will try not to bother Liu Tian as much as possible.
A little uncle who has no ability and no opinion
In this way, Liu Tian and Zheng Yang moved to another city, after two years of hard work, Liu Tian and Zheng Yang also had a savings, paid a down payment for a house, and even if they had established a foothold in this city, and as the two people's careers developed better and better, their living standards also rose in a straight line.
At this time, Liu Tian also wanted to take advantage of this opportunity to have a child, after all, the two of them now have the ability, and they can also spend a month to help share the pressure.
But things will always appear in a pile, just when Liu Tian and Zheng Yang were busy preparing for pregnancy, the father-in-law in his hometown had an accident, and after Liu Tian and Zheng Yang rushed back, the doctor declared the rescue ineffective.
This has brought a lot of impact to the family's heart, and now there is only one mother-in-law left in the family, an old man, Zheng Yang and the little uncle as the two sons of the family, naturally also have to consider the pension problem of the elderly.
According to Liu Tian's idea, in these two years, the mother-in-law and the father-in-law sold the old house, bought a new house for the little uncle, married a daughter-in-law, no matter what, the mother-in-law should also live in the little uncle's house, and then they paid some money to support it.
However, the little uncle's daughter-in-law is a relatively powerful, even if he knows that his family has taken a big advantage, he still refuses to let go, lets the mother-in-law live in his own home, and even says that Zheng Yang is the eldest son, and he should take on this responsibility, and the little uncle is a man who has no ability and no opinion, only knows to stand silently and listen to his wife and big brother discuss.
Such a scene made Liu Tian feel a little desolate in his heart, and it was inevitable that he would be a little soft-hearted, so he didn't bother to argue with his brother-in-law's daughter-in-law and decided to take his mother-in-law to his home to retire.
However, what Liu Tian did not expect was that her mother-in-law did not agree, feeling that when she went to live in Liu Tian's house now, she was violating what she had said at the beginning, and she was also a bit losing her face, so she would rather take out the savings she and her wife had saved over the years, and let her daughter-in-law accept herself.
The mother-in-law was very cold to prevent herself from going to Liu Tian in this way, so Liu Tian did not bother to put a hot face on the cold ass, and directly told Zheng Yang that he was already benevolent and righteous, and would give his mother-in-law two thousand yuan every month in the future, even if it was filial piety.
The mother-in-law regretted it
Zheng Yang also felt that his mother was a little unreasonable, so he was also a little angry, so he simply agreed to Liu Tian's suggestion, and then left his mother's alimony and went home with Liu Tian.
After that, the two people also gave their mother-in-law a sum of money every month, and other things were not much questioned, and the lives of the two people gradually got back on track, and half a year later, Liu Tian also successfully conceived a child.
After the birth of the child, Liu Tian spent money to invite a sister-in-law for a month, and then took turns with Zheng Yang to take care of the family's affairs, and the life was also orderly and prosperous. And the mother-in-law's side of the matter, although Liu Tian does not care, but still from time to time will let Zheng Yang to ask this is the mother-in-law this person stubborn, Liu Tian also knows that if there is no big deal, the mother-in-law will definitely not say.
Liu Tian and Zheng Yang are keenly aware that the mother-in-law is finally unable to stay under the trial and tear of the daughter-in-law, but Liu Tian is not the kind of person who can be used as a back road by others, after all, the mother-in-law's words and practices are still fresh in the mind, so Liu Tian must let the mother-in-law really understand her mistakes.
"Mother-in-law, the child is already in junior high school, and there is no need to help."
"But daughter-in-law, I need people for the elderly, I really regret it now, you are really a good daughter-in-law, your little brother-in-law's daughter-in-law does not take me as a person at all, my mother really knows that it is wrong, you forgive me." 」 The mother-in-law's tone was full of regret and guilt, and Liu Tian wanted the attitude of the mother-in-law, only in this way could she avoid the mother-in-law from coming and then frowning at herself.
And Liu Tian is also right, because there is a little twist and turn in the middle, so when the mother-in-law finally comes to the house, the mother-in-law presents a grateful attitude, and also tries her best to help Liu Tian, and Liu Tian can really and sincerely filial piety to the mother-in-law.
Many in-laws always want to keep their sons and daughters-in-law by their side after their sons get married, thinking that on the one hand, they can help their sons and daughters-in-law, on the other hand, they can also really guard against their daughter-in-law and do not let their daughter-in-law do something with their sons. But young people will always have some ideas of their own, and the so-called experience of the elders may sometimes be just a burden for them.
Under the collision of such ideological contradictions, the two generations will naturally have some irreconcilable contradictions, and most of the elders are very stubborn, so in this case, they would rather choose to turn their faces with their daughters-in-law than choose to understand them. Just like Liu Tian and her mother-in-law, when Liu Tian wanted to go out to develop, she was also strongly opposed by her mother-in-law.
But in fact, there may be another better way to get along between young people and elders, that is, the elders should not interfere too much in the choices and private lives of young people, and young people should not always consider the elders from their own perspective. A little respect for each other, give each other some space, maybe it is good for both parties, but also can make the two sides get along more harmoniously.
Today's topic
Do you think Liu Tian did the right thing?
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