The class teacher found that there were two children in the class who were in early love. She did not invite parents, nor did she criticize education, but directly let the two children sit at the same table with the most beautiful Lori in the class and the most handsome Zhengtai in the class

The class teacher found that there were two children in the class who were in early love. She did not invite parents, nor did she criticize education, but directly let the two children sit at the same table with the most beautiful Lori in the class and the most handsome Zhengtai in the class. A week later, the young couple ended their budding love affair in a state of jealousy and jealousy.

2, finally know what is called occupational disease, my friend was originally sent courier, and now in another friend to open a food stall to help, last night a table of guests wanted beer, shouted to the boss of the fourth table to come to a case of beer, my friend said ok, and then picked up a case of beer and threw it over. Beer shards all over the floor... Friends who open shops have green faces.

3. "Baby, what are you learning today?" "The teacher taught Cao Cao's Guancang Sea." "Yo, Cow X." Come, back to Dad. "East of jieshi..." Snap! He slapped the child in the face: "Who's the stone!" Curse your dad? What about you dying? Guo Donglin was angry.

4, a different kind of Mid-Autumn Festival In this Mid-Autumn Festival, which is related to Chinese tradition, the most cutting-edge spirit of mankind has really touched the Mid-Autumn Festival on the far side of the moon, and I stand in the moonlight like a bunch of stupid idiots who stare at the moon cake and miss you!

5, buddy Internet café opened today, I went to the scene, found that the cashier girl looks particularly good- So I immediately walked over and said, "Beauty, what kind of man do you like?" Girl: "Girls are the same, I like handsome boys, but you are an exception!" I was immediately ecstatic: "Do you like me so ugly?" Sister: "Don't be funny, as far as your clothes are concerned, I don't like it no matter how handsome you look." ”

6, shareholder A: "Brother, tomorrow I want to buy a full position toy stocks, two-child concept stocks, will definitely get rich!" Shareholder B: "You Hong Kong governor (Shanghainese, meaning fool), now start to have children, a year later will need toys, what toy stocks do you buy?" ”。 A: "So what to buy?" B: "Buy stocks for wall paint, you think, the policy is landed, the propaganda is first, the original family planning slogans do not have to be changed, what a big market, and it is about to be changed." ”

7, and the wife to take the subway home, the wife tired of hooking her hand on my neck, after a while, came a text message, the wife snatched the past, the content is as follows: report big brother, in the subway found sister-in-law and a very obscene shabi man together, what to do? Wife: Kill it directly! There will be heavy thanks

8, after breaking up with his girlfriend, grief-stricken, when he is alone, he will remember the bits and pieces of the two of us, and he can run to the barbecue stall to get drunk. As a result, the next day, before waking up, my stomach grumbled, and I ran to the toilet and almost squirted out, and I didn't stop for a day. Just thinking of posting a dynamic in the circle of friends, I said that I was upset, and I wanted to see if anyone would care about me. I didn't expect my ex-girlfriend to reply: People are handsome and beautiful women are called belly trouble, and you only deserve to be called Laxi!

9. Two college students talking. A: There are seven people in your dormitory, and I have heard that there are no, and some people call you quanzhen seven sons. B: Really, haha, I didn't expect us to be so popular! A: A fool, a madman, a dog leg, a bald man, a prodigal son, a dirt bun and your two poles. B: Ah~ Nima!

10, two colleagues in the office chatting, a female colleague talked about her daughter who went to college. She said her daughter would get by and spend only 300 yuan a month. Another female colleague said that his son would get 1500 yuan a month. Me: Big sister, let's see if your cabbage has been arched by pigs. I saw the two eldest sisters, with blue faces, saying that I could not speak.

1 Passing by the river, I saw a lot of people around, and when I got closer, it turned out to be a child drowning, no matter three seven twenty-one jumped down, it took a lot of effort to catch the child. Whose child is it, I ask? A big mom with a mobile phone taking a video suddenly shouted, "Mom! It turned out to be my child drowning! ”

12, the roommate's feet are particularly smelly, so it is very painful. That day, I happened to see a comment... It is said that using orange water can treat foot odor! So, our neighbors pooled their money to buy a box of oranges. A week later... Don't let me see that Duan Friend again... It's true! Have you ever smelled orange-smelling feet?

13, in order to save money for my son to buy a house, I went to work in an electronics factory. Today, when I went to work, I was chatting with my colleagues, and a female colleague talked about her daughter who went to college. She said her daughter would live and spend only $300 a month. Another female colleague said that his son would get 1500 yuan a month. Me: Big sister, you should take a quick look at whether your cabbage has been arched by pigs? I saw the expression of the two eldest sisters, Tie Qing, and I knew that I had said the wrong thing again!

14, the sister-in-law participates in the blind date program, there is a rich second generation disguised as an ordinary person! The sister-in-law asked, "What do you do?" FuErdai replied, "Driving." Suddenly, all the lights were extinguished, and only one of the little sister-in-law's lamps was left, and the rich second generation felt that the remaining sister-in-law must be true love, saying: "Actually, I opened a Rolls Royce for my father." Later, they successfully held hands successfully, and when they left, the sister-in-law threw a wink at the host, and the host was confused at the end, and after the prop team checked, it was found that the sister-in-law's lamp was broken