A man promised his daughter-in-law that he would buy her a villa within 25 rings of Beijing. The daughter-in-law was not at ease, so she flew to Beijing to investigate. Got off the plane, took a taxi and asked the taxi driver, "Master,

A man promised his daughter-in-law that he would buy her a villa within 25 rings of Beijing. The daughter-in-law was not at ease, so she flew to Beijing to investigate. After getting off the plane, I took a taxi and asked the taxi driver: "Master, where is the 25th Ring Road in Beijing?" Driver: "Beijing's 7 rings are in Tianjin, 8 rings are in Hebei, 9 rings are in Xingtai, 10 rings are in Handan, and 20 rings are in Xinxiang." The daughter-in-law said, "I go, these 25 rings, don't you get Jiaozuo?" The driver smiled slightly and said, "No, it's the Danjiangkou Reservoir!" ”

2. I have nothing to say with the female boss, the relationship is the same as the buddies, today he suddenly told me, I want to get married, I joked, or I marry you, the result of the female boss at that time took out the household registration book, told me to go to get the certificate is. At that time, I thought I had reached the peak of my life and married Bai Fumei, but the next day I learned that the company was going bankrupt. You say that this is a major pre-marriage concealment, can it be separated?

3. On the bus, a fashion mm squeezed the old woman when she got on the bus, and the two quarreled. mm said, "You have to tell me I'm sorry. The old woman said, "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to. mm said, "You are not sincere enough, just give me a kneeling prostration!" "Of course the old woman won't do it." A bystander said, "You're good to go!" It's like going to the wrong grave! ”

4 My brother-in-law, who has only a junior high school education, recently went to work as a salesman at an insurance company. This month, he sold dozens of orders, and the company gave a bonus of 100,000 yuan. After the lady boss gave him the bonus that day, she said to him: "Don't put all the money in your pocket is not safe!" When the brother-in-law listened, his heart tightened: "Lady boss, you are right, I can't take this money away by my wife!" Then he solemnly returned the money to the lady boss.

5 Working at Foxconn, a colleague is 22 years old but he has a round of beard and is very old. When I first went to work this morning, I said to me depressedly, "Never take the bus again." I asked, "Is it called uncle again?" He said: "This morning I gave way to a mother with a child, and when I sat down, my mother said to her baby: 'Thank you Uncle!'" ’”

6 Today the supermarket was discounted, I bought two large bags of things to go home, and I went into the elevator with a sister. My sister went to the 18th floor, but I had something in both hands, so I said to her: Beauty, help down the 7th floor. Maybe I wasn't sincere enough, maybe she was annoyed today, and she rolled her eyes at me and said: I don't have hands! Then I put down my things and walked over to the 8th floor and said, "Look, brother has hands!" Also extra flexible! Then I pressed all floors above 8........

7 A few days ago, my cousin went to a newly opened Internet café to surf the Internet and found that the network manager was a university alumnus who had not been seen for a long time. So I happily chatted with him for a while, and then asked him, "Dude, do you have a girlfriend?" The alumnus shook their heads and said, "Not yet!" Cousin: "You're so old, why don't you look for one?" The alumnus smiled and said, "Alas, my daughter-in-law has been more strict recently, and I really can't find it!" ”

8 Yesterday I went to the zoo and told my son a lot, telling him that wild animals are more powerful, much more powerful than those in the family and captivity...

Then, in the afternoon, when they played mahjong with their husbands, the daughter-in-law won several games in a row, and she was shocked.

The son looked at it for a while, hurried to his mother, and gave a thumbs up: Mom, you are so powerful! You're wild, right?!

The old man's face is green!

9 When I was in junior high school, a boy chased me, he was too short, not as tall as me, I refused, he still insisted, and waited for me to go to school every morning. In order to hide from him, I wore my mother's clothes every day, covered my face and went out to pretend to be a big mother. My mother did not know the situation, see I snatched her clothes every day and wore them, one day said to me: You child, adolescence is a bit retrograde!

10 When I was in the first grade, in the middle of the night, I actually cried and woke up my parents. My mom rushed over and asked me: What's wrong, kid? I said: I want to eat bread! My mother picked up the feather duster next to me and was about to beat me, but my father stopped me and said, "Forget it, the child wants to eat, I'll go down and buy it for him." In the winter, Dad put on a military coat, knocked on several shops, bought bread, and handed it to me. I said lightly: I don't want to eat strawberry sandwiches, I want to eat bean paste fillings! Immediately after, a mixed doubles meal!

11 Classmates party, driving a lot of Mercedes BMW, I drive Wuling Hongguang. Before the dish, everyone bragged about the mountain. Someone asked me how to open Wuling Hongguang, is it not mixed up? I said solemnly, originally received a lot of luxury car coupons, but I am a dedicated person, just want to buy a car, in fact, Ferrari is very good, last year I took into account when I visited the car show, no matter its performance or configuration is the top, but the seats are too few, can not sit down my girlfriends, think about it, so finally chose Wuling Hongguang!

12 In order to chase me, the divorced landlady boss of the company sent me the Maserati that she had opened for a long time. The first time I drove a sports car, I went to my buddies to show off, and as a result, there was a car accident on the road, and the car was almost scrapped and sent to the 4s shop for repair. As a result, hail fell the next day, and several bags were smashed on the forehead that could not be dodged. When I got home in a daze, my mother asked: Is there a fight with someone again? Me: No, it's a day hit. My Mom: Thunderclap? Did you swear too much? I...... 

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